The Diary of Akane Tendo
by Trevelyan Duke
Summary: Akane's got a diary, and she writes about this guy. Ranma, perhaps? Probably, but he's surely sharing the pages with another one...
1. The New Guy

**Author's Notes:** I was almost done with _Changed Overnight_, but the 5-minute pineapple juice break had an effect on me, so I ended up posting this fic instead. I actually started making this two months ago with _The Princess Diaries_ in mind. Hope you like it. (",)

**Disclaimer:** Not mine, not yours, but hers.

* * *

**The Diary of Akane Tendo**

**Chapter One: The New Guy**

**Tuesday, November 30, my room **

Sometimes I wonder why people are born.

I mean, there's no point in living because we're all going to die anyway. Well, yeah, smart people go to school and end up living lifestyles of the rich and famous, but hey, one thing: just like homeless beggars with rotten teeth and normal people careworn to live, they're all going to DIE. Everyone ends up dead, and I'm not scared to say that. So what's the point of being born, eating, going to school, earning money, plastic surgeries and all that if we're all going to be decomposed into soil anyway?

Because of all the problems my life is fraught with – and with _my life_, I mean only my personal life, where I am tortured and degraded everyday until predictably one second I just shrink into smithereens in utter mortification – I just blow up and shriek inside my room in misery and being fed up with all of it, in the middle of the night.

So everyone in Nerima wakes up. People start banging on my door. I hear that voice, the owner of which is one of the main reasons I shrieked, and it went, "Akane! What's happening? Open the door!"

I covered myself with the blanket and just listened to their disturbed tones. "We're all going to _die_," I went when a minute of their upheaval passed. "Leave me alone!"

And as usual, as if the word PRIVACY didn't mean anything to him, Ranma Saotome broke into my room, expecting a ninja or assassin ready to take the ever helpless, weak me away through the window. I was under my covers so I didn't see his face, but he heaved a sigh of relief (or should I say aggravation) and went, "_Baka_! Why the heck did you go screaming like some terrorist was strangling you? You woke everyone up!"

Hearing that word again, the same bursting feeling built up inside of me. I didn't even hear anything – I just faintly detected Dad's, Uncle Genma's and my two sisters' voices that didn't make any sense – and I blew up.

"Get the _hell_ out of my room! I hate you!" I was screaming the whole time, pushing everybody out. Thanks to the adrenaline rush, I shoved them out of my room despite their pushing back. I blocked the door with my desk and everything else I could get hold of. In all the panic, I still managed to lock my window (because duh, with all the kung-fu-flying-jumping-leaping freaks in Nerima, the window is not at all an inconvenient entrance to my room).

And like the stupid crybaby that I am, I wept. They were still banging on my door, obviously confused and worried about my behavior, but I didn't say anything. I just sat against the desk and cuddled myself on the floor.

What, they didn't think I was human? "_All_ humans experience at least one breakdown in their lifetime," according to Dr. Phil when he guest showed in Oprah. Well, Dr. Phil, I know that – but unfortunately my family does not. It's either they're just plain lame at this whole decoding-human-emotions thing, or they don't think I'm human AT ALL. Now, if you could give me a solution to this whole dilemma, then I would immediately bow down at your feet and proclaim you the best psychoanalyst in the whole wide world!

Yes, those were the thoughts running through my head as the We-Think-Akane's-Going-Crazy Horde were frantically calling out my name – Dr. Phil and his psychological theories.

It just took my eldest sister to calm everyone down. She made them stop the banging on my door and then talked to me with her gentle, soothing voice. She went, "Akane, are you okay? What happened?"

Because nobody could really resist Kasumi's tone, and because I figured that if I didn't stop, they would eventually force me into seeing a real psychoanalyst (which I wasn't really in favor of even if it was Dr. Phil), I went, "I-I'm okay. I just had this nightmare. Sorry for waking all of you up…"

All of them went, "Are you really okay? Can we get you anything?" and such, but I said I was fine and sleepy. So they all went back to their rooms, thinking I was all right, because apparently they didn't hear my faint sobbing. But I wasn't all right. I just had a BREAKDOWN for crying out loud – who wouldn't be _okay_ after one of those? Huh? HUH?

With the very little strength I had left (it was midnight and I was so destabilized after that adrenaline rush), I got up and lay down on my bed. My crying resumed and it was a wonder why nobody was woken up by my late night psycho issue again. It was then that I felt great pity towards myself – didn't anybody care about me anymore (that was before I realized that I myself told them to leave, yeah)?

Much to my surprise, there was a knock on the door. "Akane?" the soothing voice of my eldest sister beseeched. "You're crying. Please open the door."

"I'm fine," I mumbled. But I could tell my sobs were as clear as… well, the clearest sound on earth for my sister, because she didn't leave – just like what she's been doing every time I was down in the dumps and consistently told everyone to leave me alone. Kasumi Tendo isn't only a sister to me; she's the shoulder I could always cry on, _my eyes when I couldn't see, my voice when I couldn't speak_… and the rest of the lyrics of that song.

Kasumi didn't really believe what I said because she knew me better than the rest of the family did. She said that if I had any problems, I could tell her, because she's my sister.

And so, having been touched by the realization that somebody _did_ care, it all just flooded out of me afterwards – how I want to die right now because I don't want to live long and suffer all the unbearable things _Kami-sama_ burdens me with, how I cry all the time but I want nobody to find out because it hurts me so much when CERTAIN PEOPLE call me names like _baka_ and _kawaiikune_, and I don't want to be labeled a crybaby because I already have diminishing self-esteem and things could really get worse.

"Nobody likes me," I concluded my emotional rant. "The people I love don't even recognize my concern for them and they just toss it away unknowingly."

"Akane, we all love you," Kasumi said after my long whining rant. "Father and Uncle Genma, Nabiki and I, Ranma and… _everybody_. You know that."

Not even caring about the probable number of ears listening, I answered dolefully, "_Ranma_ doesn't love me."

And I just had to say that.

There were many things that I could have said, like maybe, you know, "Thanks," or "Okay. I love you too." But NO, my stupid mouth went, "_Ranma_ doesn't love me" with a frightening emphasis on his name.

Right after I said that, there was this _thud_ sound of something – or someone – falling from up the roof to the ground outside. Someone was clearly listening from outside my window! Since it was locked and the curtains were closed, I let my breath escape quickly in the form of "_Oh crud_," and didn't even care to look.

Kasumi, having not noticed anything except what I said about Ranma not loving me, went, "You want him to love you? Because there's only one reason for that, Akane… _you love him, don't you?_"

If Kasumi was the only person listening, I would have said what I really wanted to say. But of course she wasn't the only one paying attention, so I answered tersely, "NO. Who would fall in love with an arrogant _baka_ like him?"

She felt I wasn't very truthful, so she asked me to open the door a little. I moved the desk and unlocked the door, and through a small gap a few inches wide she handed me this furry pink notebook. She said I should write my feelings more often because suppressing emotions is very detrimental and could be the cause of derangement.

I swear, I wouldn't know what to do if not for my eldest sister; I love her so much with all my being. But she told me that instead of restraining my feelings more, I should start writing them down because it would do me good, especially after my "nightmare".

It's like three in the morning, but okay, I'll write down my feelings:

WHY CAN'T I DIE RIGHT NOW?

* * *

**Tuesday, Homeroom **

When I woke up this morning, I was all, "Hey, another day at school. This wouldn't be so bad." I had begun to forget about what happened a few hours ago, because I was somehow drowsy due to lack of sleep (no wonder I do not grow any taller every year anymore; I don't get the eight hours of sleep I deserve every night – and my sleeping habits worsened when the Saotomes entered my life).

The first thing Ranma said when I walked into the dining room was, "Ohayou."

Maybe he was talking to a ghost behind me… er, not likely. I ignored him and minded my own business. I mean, _he_ was the reason I went ballistic last night. He was not going to get away with it in a million years! Or, you know, considering that humans have very short life spans due to the increasing quandary of global warming and pollution and all that, I give him ten years tops.

But he didn't know it. That he was the reason I blew up, I mean. It thought it would be cruel to act that way to someone innocent, so I had second thoughts. And that made my morning just great.

NOT.

While Ranma and I walked to school, he kept stealing glances and asking me what happened. I kept quiet and looked ahead, like I was angry. And I actually was! It was so totally his fault, even if he didn't know. I know that sounds unfair on his part, but he's supposed to be responsible for his actions. I mean, he's no five-year old kid – he's _sixteen_ for crying out loud!

He was still concerned, though. He said, "Listen, Akane. I don't know what happened, but I just hope you still have your sanity. Kasumi told me you had this little problem."

And in my head I was all, _Okay, here it comes. What's it going to be? That I was such an idiot for waking everybody up with a little problem, that I acted like some crazy gorilla, that it was unreasonable?_

Instead, to my surprise, he went, "Well, whatever it is, everybody's here to back you up." And he added, in a whisper that he might have thought I couldn't hear, "I'm always here for you."

My heart was fluttering that time, but I went, "You said something?" in a tone that I hope was nonchalant. He said it was nothing, but you know what? He actually blushed. I think.

What was that about?

I decided not to take it seriously because it may end up with false hopes and such, like many times before. I actually _believed_ he had feelings for me. But with all the name-calling, I thought, _Okay. No way he loves me._

Yet why do I feel like there's something about him that makes my heart beat fast like no other person could, and that somehow, he feels the same? I know – the hormones of a growing lady are most active at this age, thus resulting in terribly assuming habits run amok. It's supposed to be completely normal, yet I feel like a jerk for feeling this way towards someone who makes me want to end my own life.

**ODE TO RANMA **

_Saotome Ranma, why do you keep_

_Hurting and haunting me, hacking into my heart_

_Like it's just some computer you can violate_

_And play with anytime?_

_I don't know how you could make me feel_

_That I love you and hate you_

_At the same time_

_Or show that you could be caring and insensitive_

_All at once._

_But I just want you to stop it._

_Stop playing with my heart_

_Because it started hurting a long time ago._

_Pretty soon my heart's going to be cut into half_

_And I would just want my life to end by any means._

_STOP IT, BAKA!_

I wish I'd just said good morning back at him. He wouldn't have asked if I was okay, because he should have _known_ I was okay. So that wouldn't give him the reason to say he's always there for me. Because hearing that makes me feel weird.

Okay. I know I'm overreacting, because what's wrong with greeting someone a good morning? He may have addressed that to Kasumi, Nabiki or whoever. It's just that… ugh, I don't know what's wrong with me…

So, having heard what he whispered to himself, that he's always there for me, I should be happy, right? Because he might have feelings other than hatred for me after all. I actually am happy.

NOT! Now the forces inside this heart of mine are having this tug-of-war that's splitting my heart into two. Which is not good, if you ask me. So not.

Akane 1: Come on, Akane, he loves you! This is RANMA we're talking about!

Akane 2: No, Akane! Nowadays, words that insult you _don't_ mean _lurv_.

There's this all-knowing voice in my head, though, saying, "Crap. Kill yourself and get it over with."

It strongly resembles Nabiki's, which totally creeps me out. I mean, I know that my sister would never say that to me, but considering that she's boldly done many atrocious and insolent things before, who knows? Nabiki's voice is getting louder in my head by the moment, and it's really not a nice experience if your own sister's voice resounds in your head all the time, telling you to kill yourself.

Tell you what, Voices In My Head – all three of you, yeah – I'm not listening! I mean, I know it's just senseless because I don't need to have ears to hear the things inside my head, but by _willing_ that my brain's ears close whenever you speak, I can do it. Really.

Not making sense.

Oh, gotta go, Math teacher's here. Maybe I'll write again during English before the usual translating exercises, because the teacher would spend a few minutes chatting in front and choosing students that she'd want to hear delivering some paragraphs in English.

Yes, most high school students in Japan still do not know how to speak fluent English, I'm afraid to say so.

* * *

**Tuesday, English**

There's a new guy in class. He looked rather, er… cute the moment he entered the room as the math teacher ushered him inside. He had light brown hair, green eyes, and a mild smile painted on his lips. I was the only girl with enough poise to not sink on my desk and drool in front of him while he introduced himself as Avery Hanabishi. His tone was friendly, like he wanted to have a connection with everybody and let them know that he could be their friend. I give him props for that.

The teacher made him sit on the unoccupied seat beside me. Everybody's eyes were on him, including mine (but I wasn't looking at him like, "_Ohmigod_, you are SO handsome," like the other girls, or "Hmm… newcomer," sort of surly like the guys). The moment he sat down and settled his stuff, he smiled at me. In an affable way.

And I was so evil because I didn't smile back. I raised my eyebrows and faced the front. It wasn't my fault; being accusing and suspicious of the guys I meet being conceited _isn't_ my fault!

Okay, who am I kidding? I didn't smile back because I thought I sensed egotism in his smile. Maybe I was imagining things because I thought that in his head he was going, "Hey, she's a _cutie_. Avery Hanabishi, you just snagged another one!"

I was so evil, thinking about that when in fact all he was trying to do was make friends with his seatmate. Paranoia, Akane. Paranoia's the word. It's an inevitable sickness in me, which is sorta excusable because nobody should blame himself for being sick. After all, Tatewaki Kuno started it. Tatewaki Kuno and his sick, drooling, we-like-having-mirrors-on-top-of-our-shoes-so-we-could-see-what's-under-the-girlies'-skirts-teehee cronies.

Die, Kuno! Die, Furinkan High Hentai Horde! Which reminds me, I hope it isn't too far from my destiny. Dying, I mean.

* * *

**Tuesday night, my room**

After Math was English where we had to translate all those Japanese sentences into English in our notebooks. I dropped my pencil (NOT on purpose, of course, because I am not the type of girl who flirts using the oops-I-dropped-my-pencil-so-cute-guy-could-you-get-it-for-me method) and when I was about to pick it up, he bent down from his seat and got it for me. When he straightened up, he bumped his head under his desk. He massaged the back of his head and handed my pencil back to me when he noticed that the lead was broken, so he exchanged my pencil with his. I wordlessly smiled at him, and maybe in my smile was the expression, "Thanks, but how about you?" because he gladly said, "Don't worry. I have an extra one. I'll give your pencil back when I've sharpened it."

Wasn't that just _nice_? He bumped his head, and he was still so kind. Because, you know, I read in this psychology magazine that people who bump their head a lot, or even once in a while, experience crabbiness as a side effect of shaking the brain's neurons or something. But Avery wasn't irritable at all, which was one of the good first impressions I had of him.

In Physical Education (they use that term to make it sound complicated. Why not call it _Gym Class?_), which was the last period, we just stayed in the classroom instead of our usual sports activities in the gym and listened to the teacher lecturing us about what to do in case of cramps and stuff, when a baseball from outside shattered one of the windows. Luckily, nobody was hurt with the broken glass, but someone was hit by the baseball. It happened to be Avery.

Since I was his seatmate, the teacher made me accompany him to the clinic because a small gash on his forehead was slightly bleeding, and I agreed immediately in return for his good deed with the pencil (all the while flashing warning looks to the sniggering guys, and avoiding the jealous glances of the girls as Avery and I went out of the classroom).

In the clinic, the nurse was asking Avery all sorts of questions while she treated his wound. I sat in front of them, listening to their conversation (and that's how I found out how a foreigner like him could have a Japanese surname, because his great grandfather was Japanese). He had this nice, deep voice – but not too deep. It sounded gentle and rather smart, probably because of his almost-unnoticeable-but-noticed-by-me British accent when he spoke Japanese. Yeah, how could that happen? The whole mixed blood thing I could understand, but the _accent_? I don't really know. It was fascinating, though.

When the nurse left the room, he looked at me. And his emerald green eyes were really sincere and calm that I couldn't help smiling the whole time we talked. He went, "Thanks for coming with me to the clinic."

"It's nothing," I replied. "You were hurt. I'm the person seated next to you after all, and that's why the teacher asked me to come with you here. Don't worry, I'll talk to those baseball players on the field…"

He chuckled. He was so charming when he did that. "Please don't. That was only an accident. I'm Avery Hanabishi."

"Yeah, I know," I said, being so stupid for not realizing that the reason why he introduced himself again was he wanted to know my name. So he made this little gesture with his hand towards me, a questioning look on his face, and I stammered, "Oh, I-I'm, uh… Akane Tendo."

I am so sure that sounded smart.

And that's how I came to know a guy named Avery today. It's really not a big deal, making friends with somebody new, but for a while there in the clinic I forgot all about wanting to die. In fact, when Ranma and I walked home, I didn't feel the same tense air that surrounded us this morning. I was in high spirits and just looking forward to hugging my cute little P-chan.

It was all going fine when Ranma suddenly went, "Why are you so happy? Something with your new _friend_?"

I didn't feel like returning the sarcastic tone he had, so I grinned at him. He almost lost his balance on the fence he was walking on. Even I don't know why I GRINNED – it was so not me – especially when Ranma was there and most especially when his first blow on me was mocking. I just said, "Yeah, something with my new friend. He's nice. I don't know why Hiroshi and the others thought it was funny when Avery's forehead was hit with the baseball." I said it pointedly, and he did answer it rather disgustedly.

"Because he thinks he's a star. _Avery Hanabishi, the exchange student that girls drool over_. He's proud and BIGHEADED."

Ah, and the truth came out. He was threatened. Jealous, maybe?

"That isn't true!" I retorted. "He's really nice. You know, you should get to know people before labeling them names."

"I know him well enough. You shouldn't hang out with him." Then he snorted. "I don't know why he'd even want to hang out with a _kawaiikune_ person like you!" We were in the vicinity of the dojo already and he quickly opened the door, no wonder expecting me to mallet him out of orbit.

He was about to run inside when I went, "You should really get to know people before labeling them names," in a hurt tone. I didn't make loud frustrated noises or anything; I just hurried past him, went upstairs to my room, and sourly flopped on my bed.

I swear, I can't take any of this anymore. I used to be strong; I used to be cool and composed despite of all the troubles Kuno gave me with the Furinkan High Hentai Horde facing me every morning and trying to defeat me so one of them would be my boyfriend! How could Ranma make me feel so vulnerable? And WHY, for crying out loud?

Oh yeah, I forgot. I love him.

Not! Akane Tendo, you _don't_ love Ranma Saotome. What are you thinking? Just now when you're still battling with your feelings, your heart's almost torn into two. What more if the battle is done? Either you win (and you get to mend your heart), or you lose (and you'll drown in misery, and… well, blood from your torn-apart heart. I know it sounds lame, but these words are the closest I could get to what otherwise inexistent words I had in mind).

And besides, Akane, think of it. _Do you actually want a mocking, insensitive, heartless guy like _Ranma_ to be your boyfriend?_ I mean, as if the fact that he's your fiancé already isn't enough, but with the word boyfriend, I mean finally getting together with him with your consent, not because your parents forced you to.

Akane 1: Er… I guess not.

Akane 2: See? I thought so.

Dinnertime and I didn't even take as much as a glance at him. I tried my best to act normal and I think it worked. Nobody asked me what was wrong. Or maybe they were just scared I might blow up again like last night, because even though I said it was just a nightmare, they realized that I could be really extreme and just lose my nuts and bolts. After dinner I headed back to my room – and that's where I am now, sitting on my bed. I think I'll study Math.

Someone's knocking. IT'S RANMA! He wants to talk to me. He asks if he could come in. Later.

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**Author's Notes:** So what do you think of the whole diary thing? Maybe Avery could be an addition to the _Boys Who Are Crazy About Akane_ fans club… just to give Ranma a thought or two about how Akane feels about Ranma having fiancés other than her. And I swear, I'm almost done with the next chapter of _Changed Overnight_, but I just had to get this out of my head so I can concentrate on _CO_.

Thanks for reading and please review! (",)


	2. Apologies Come And Go

**Author's Notes:** Hurrah, I finally updated! Sorry for the long wait… had to finish the last few chapters of _Changed Overnight_. Here's the next chapter of _TDoAT_. I totally appreciated your reviews, so this one's a page longer (I know that's not much, but on second thought, hey – that's about 300 more words of Akane's deranged whines about her life), as what the statistics of Word says when the page size is _letter_ and the font is Verdana, size 8. ;)

I reposted this because I decided that replying to my reader's reviews would do this fic a little better. The replies are at the bottom of this chapter. (",)

**Disclaimer:** Not mine, not yours, but hers.

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**The Diary of Akane Tendo**

**Chapter Two: Apologies Come and Go**

**More Tuesday, 15 before 10**

It looks like I'll be sleeping on a bed of roses tonight.

When Ranma came in and closed the door behind him, my eyes didn't pay attention to his figure. I was flipping the pencil with my fingers and I had this lackadaisical air around me. I was looking down on my diary, but I _did_ sense his uneasiness. He sat on the chair near my desk and didn't know where to start.

"A-Akane," he began, stuttering.

"Hm?" I raised my eyebrows and glanced at him.

Hah, I know how to raise my eyebrows in a I'm-a-beauty-queen-so-who-are-you way! I mean, I get to raise my eyebrows everyday, because my life is just fraught with I've-gotta-raise-my-eyebrows incidents especially when Ranma is around, but I don't get to raise them in the I'm-a-beauty-queen-so-who-are-you manner on a daily basis. It makes me feel great for some reason.

"I'm sorry about this afternoon. For…" He took a deep breath. "_For not getting to know people before labeling them names._" His fingers were fidgeting as he talked and he was looking straight into my eyes, not with his usual confidence and challenge, but with the look of a little boy who's done something bad, waiting for his mother's reply of forgiveness. I thought it was nice because Ranma isn't the type who'd bow down to anybody and apologize (and of course, everybody in Nerima knows that – from the masters of other dojos, to the street vendors, to the street dogs he's unleashed his untargeted frustration on).

Almost cute, actually.

"It's okay," I said, forgetting what Kasumi said about how repressing feelings was bad, because I technically repressed the words I wanted to shout at Ranma. I've wanted to do that for such a long time, but I didn't, maybe because I figured there still was hope with the seemingly hopeless person sitting in front of me. So I went on: "Avery doesn't know you called him bigheaded and all. You could be good friends, you know." I smiled encouragingly at him.

AND HE BLUSHED. I'm sure about it this time unlike when we were walking on the street, because he was just there in front of me. That, and the fact that I have perfect 20-20 vision. And it's not like Ranma blushes in front of me everyday, considering the fact that he regards me as a _kawaiikune tomboy_, so that's enough reason that I'm taking this down, thank you very much.

He went, "No, I meant… I'm sorry for calling _you_ names." He was about to open his mouth again, but he hesitated and looked down on the floor. I smiled again. There weren't many times he's apologized to me for all those things he'd done. But I know, like all those few times he'd said sorry, that he's going to do the things he'd apologized for again anyway.

Oh, life. He's like a drug addict, really, who's been promising that he's on the way to rehabilitation, but in reality he doesn't even know how to withdraw from the habit. Poor… me… because I am actually the recipient of this cruelty.

"Ranma," I began, "I don't know why you're even apologizing. You're going to call me names again until… I dunno, until the end of time." Yep, that's the thing. No beating around the bush. And let me tell you, he was surprised to see me smiling despite what I said. "I know that _baka_ and _kawaiikune_ and all those names and… well, insults are permanently sited in your daily vocabulary. No matter how you try–"

And that was the moment he made himself clear.

"Look, this time I mean it." His voice was a bit shaky at first, but eventually it became clear and stable. "I am truly sorry. Because I want you to know that _Kami-sama_ has never burdened you with unbearable things. You should be confident with yourself because you're one of the best girls around. You're smart, strong, and… y-you're… cute."

I am not even kidding. And he went on:

"And everybody likes you. Your dad and sisters like you, my dad likes you, our schoolmates like you – heck, all of the boys, very much – and, well… I like you. So don't you say that your love for everyone's wasted because you make our lives complete. I… I mean, all of us love you. It's my time to ask you not to waste it, including your life." He forced a smile on his lips that I thought was going to look uptight, but it actually came out heartfelt.

Never would I have thought that Ranma Saotome was capable of delivering such profound words.

After a moment of being stunned by what he said (with that touched, puppy dog look on my face that I'm sure looked stupid, as always, when people did nice things like this to me), I realized something. "You didn't happen to be hanging around my window last night, did you?"

And his stuttering came back. "N-no! In the middle of the night? _Baka_! Why would I even–" He stopped, the look on his face telling me that he was using all his willpower to prevent him from putting a hand over his mouth because that would make him look guiltier. But really, he said the word again. See?

"It's okay." I got up from my bed and headed towards the door to open it for him. "Look, it's getting really late and we still have school tomorrow. I'm sure you want to go to sleep now." I wasn't really looking at him – I was facing the door – so maybe he thought I was disappointed and hurt (when in fact I was already touched by his apology. REALLY).

Ranma stood up and was about to get out when he stopped beside me. "Don't end your life, Akane," he said as firmly as he possibly could. When I looked at him his face was scrunched up into a frown, showing much determination to force a bunch of words out of him like he was having a hard time opening his mouth. Or, you know, maybe it was just constipation.

"The world could really use nice _kawaii_ people like you," he finished forcedly. And with that, he left – more likely ran – downstairs.

Ranma Saotome said I was cute! The world is coming to an end! _BUT WHO CARES?_

To think that he said "Don't end your life, Akane" basically meant that he took my death threat seriously last night, given the fact that he was actually the one listening outside my window. He was! And he took it seriously! I admit I was half – or three quarters – serious about the whole suicide thing when I told Kasumi about it, but now I don't really know if those words really came out of my mouth. I don't want to end my life now, especially because the reason I wanted to commit suicide just gave me a reason not to do so.

Know what, I'm getting the hang of carrying this furry pink notebook everywhere. I think I've done more than enough diary writing – I've already filled a couple of pages in one day! I think I feel an obsession coming…

* * *

**Wednesday, December 1, Homeroom**

When Ranma and I were walking to school, everything was weird. Most of the time in the past, we just kept quiet. And we were this morning, of course, because a night of apology can never possibly make too drastic a change, like he'd carry me in his arms and French kiss me all the way (which, I tell you, I'm not really longing for, but you know… who knows? Bah), but the silence between us was _tense_. I don't know how to put it into more explicit words. We kept glancing at each other, and then we hastily looked away when our eyes met. I was blushing for sure. My usual tough disposition left me. I was all shy. And I hated that, because for one thing, I get all shy like, twice or thrice in a year.

Kuno met us near the entrance and went, "Tendo Akane, the sun doth shine brighter upon your advent! My love, I will save thee from that vile sorcerer! Step aside – this battle going to be vicious," as was his dialogue every single time he met me during the present school year of my high school life. He laid his hand on my shoulder, and (I don't know why I didn't punch him in the face or did something equally painful to him) I giggled. I actually GIGGLED because of Tatewaki Kuno. And I was all, "Ohayou, Kuno-sempai," and continued walking towards my class. Imagine the looks of everybody when I said that!

I mean, it wasn't everyday that Akane Tendo was in the mood to greet Tatewaki Kuno. It never did happen, in fact. So yeah, the Hentai Horde began bombarding Kuno with questions the moment I entered the building. They were asking him what his secret was, or whatever happened between the two of us last night… things like that. And I didn't even want to hear what that deranged kendoist answered. What I did to my reputation was just heinous, stabbing Kuno with his bokken couldn't erase all the rumors and my shame.

Disbelief was smothered on Ranma's face, even on Kuno's. I swear, I do not know what Ranma's telling me I was cute did to me. Am too shocked because of what I did. Later.

* * *

**Wednesday night, my room **

During lunch, I ate with Avery. He's cool. No, more than that:

HE'S A PRINCE.

Okay, not exactly the ruler of a nation, but the owner of vast lands and several mansions, buildings, and businesses. And that's like, as princely as one could ever get.

He told me about his life: He was twelve when his family moved here from Britain, and he used to be home-schooled. But he told his parents that he wanted to be like his older brother who was in a private high school that time, so he could mingle with other kids. He experienced his first high school years in some school in Tokyo, and because he was smart enough, he became an exchange student here in Nerima. Not really a smart choice, if you ask me, because I'd rather go to school in Tokyo than in this crazed city, but he said he was beginning to like the adventure that this city brings him everyday.

And I went, "Cool," when his face saddened, so I asked him what was wrong.

That's when I found out about his princely treasures. He explained about the death of his parents in a plane crash, and one day this man just came and informed him that all his parents' properties are his and his brother's already. His share consists of a few hundred acres of land in Mexico, Britain and Korea, chains of restaurants, hotels and all that, mines, companies all over the world, and many more.

I got to know Avery more and we became friends. I like him because he's nice and open, he doesn't call me names, and most of all, he's humble even though he practically has his own _El Dorado_ (so I like him not just, as some people may have been thinking, because he's rich). Because, you know, if you ask me, guys who are as rich as Avery only think about bling, cars, casinos, golf, and the most expensive prostitutes that they could take home. So when he asked about me, I told him about my family, the dojo, and the freeloaders. Somehow, I forgot telling him about the freeloaders' curse because his life was so normal (in a way that it was curse-free, because when it came to riches, he's WAY over the not normal line) and I didn't want to seem like a freak.

He made me try this white chocolate made by Jacque Torres himself who was a good friend of Avery's, and it was the best. He gave me a box of them after class when his limousine came to pick him up – yes, limousine – and it was not on a daily basis that a limousine came to pick someone up in Furinkan High School, so it definitely raised not just a few heads, roused not just a few people's jealousy, and made not just a few girls' – and gays', for that matter – hearts beat faster (with, I suspect, matching _kaching_ sounds and yen signs in their eyes).

And Ranma was all, "Know what, you're snuggling too much with that guy. You're getting too comfortable with him."

Like I had no right to be comfortable at all.

So I said, "What's wrong with it?"

_Baka_. Now he's telling me not to make friends with the opposite sex, when he's got a few more fiancés than needed. He doesn't even need me anymore because amazons, gymnasts, and okonomiyaki chefs just suck up to him. And if those three aren't enough, he can just go to the _We Love Ranma_ fans club (am not kidding, there exists such a heinous organization at school, and so does the _We Love Akane_ fans club, which, I tell you, is not flattering at all) and superglue his hands to their panties. I doubt they'd even carp about it.

Ranma and I argued all the way home, like we didn't even have that talk last night. Like he never told me to not end my life because the world could use cute people like me. Like he never told me that whatever problem I had, everybody was there to back me up, and he was always there for me.

Oh, crap.

My desire to die is rekindled.

* * *

**Thursday, December 2, Math**

I was thinking. Why would I let myself be affected by Ranma's insults? After all, girls are superior to boys. And I'm not going to say I love him. Because I completely don't. Right?

From now on, I will:

1.) not accept any of Ranma Saotome's apologies,

2.) not be moved whenever he says I'm cute and all, because it's all just a bluff to stop me from setting my mallet on him,

3.) not shriek in the middle of the night because everyone in the dojo starts to see me as a lunatic now and keep casting furtive looks at me as if I were a time bomb ready to blow up any time even when the smallest bit of dust irritates me,

4.) smile back at people who smile at me, especially exchange students, because they're really nice and they give me sweet white chocolates made by famous chocolate makers such as Jacque Torres, and

5.) write faithfully in this diary everyday, because I've just realized that Kasumi was justifiably right when she said it would do me good.

HOMEWORK

Math: study quadratic equation; real roots

English: past, present, future perfect tenses; 10 examples each

World History: Ferdinand Marcos (Philippines) & Fidel Castro (Cuba) regimes; MEMORIZE DATES!

Japanese: create haiku; teacher will scrutinize # of syllables

Science: periodic table; discovery of chosen elements

Study Period: none

Physical Education: written quiz on cramps: causes, muscle condition, treatment

* * *

**Thursday, after school, porch across koi pond**

Here are some notes with Avery during study period:

_Saw you sinking on your chair science period. U ok? -AH_

Yes, don't worry, mind just weary. Not actually eager to memorize periodic table of elements. -AT

_I'll help you. Memorized it last year in old school. Fine with that? -hopefully new science tutor_

Would be great. Thanks. -new science student

Right after he read my reply, he walked to the teacher's desk without hesitation and asked, "Sir, could Akane and I sit closer for the rest of the study period? We're going to study together." Most teachers would be mad if the students' chairs were too close to each other, because they're too (taking a leaf out of my book, I see) paranoid about cheating, so it's kind of like a rule to keep one chair at a distance from another, but Avery didn't know that.

Everybody's eyes were on me because Avery didn't actually _whisper_ to the teacher. The guys had a disbelieving look on their faces and all of the girls were scowling (except Sayuri and Yuka who had both of their thumbs up). When Avery got the teacher's permission – even the teacher was surprised because in study period, everybody was supposed to keep quiet and study _alone_, until this exchange student came – he smiled at me and moved his desk and chair closer to mine. See, this was the advantage of having new students around – they tend to break the boring norms and not be punished for it.

I glanced at Ranma who looked very irritated about something. I had this great impulse to frown and stick my tongue out at him, but because of the huge amount of space he occupies in my thoughts, thus rendering inoperative some of the nerves controlling my body movements, I ended up mouthing, "Want to study with us?" I was even smiling, like the argument yesterday didn't happen. Yes, I was _that_ nice to him in study period – maybe it was the effect of hanging out with someone like Avery.

Ranma almost jumped out of his chair. And predictably, he ended up muttering, "_Kawaiikune_!" I heard it because he wasn't seated too far, and the class was silent, so they practically heard it, too.

Was that even an answer?

I didn't do anything wrong this time, I know it! I did not offend him in any way. I was even nice enough to invite him to study with us, which he should have accepted on account of the fact that he is really, REALLY lame in science (if you call the letter grade D lame, which, of course, it is). Now I'm thinking that Ranma was just plain jealous of me "snuggling too much" with Avery, which is the only possible explanation I have in my trouble-fraught brain. But then, haha, on second thought, that is just as humorous as The Three Stooges doing their slapstick routine, because it just couldn't possibly happen in the real world. I mean, okay, Ranma did say that he liked me, but apparently not enough for him to refrain from calling me hurtful names, _especially in front of the whole class._

I swear, I do not know what is wrong with me – I have feelings for a guy who says I'm _kawaiikune_ out of his pure instinct. And I think he's an idiot, but I still kind of love him. Honestly, kind of. Why the heck has _Kami-sama_ burdened me with this? Humor me, _Kami_, what have I done in my life to deserve such an inexorable situation? I've been a good daughter to my parents and a good sister to Kasumi and Nabiki – undeniably. Sure, there were a few rebellions now and then, but I'm certain it's all part of a normal family. _Tell me, what have I done?_

Yes, I've been frantically asking _Kami_ that question in my head, so I was grouchy the whole time Avery was explaining the discovery of O (oxygen) and H (hydrogen). My bad mood has affected my study period with him, which, when I think of it now, has incited my conscience to feel very culpable. He kept trying to erase the frown on my face but I still kept painting it on relentlessly, so he told me we'll have to do it some other time – this coming weekend, he promised – because I wasn't in the mood and he didn't want to force my brain into further understanding the history of the discovery of Ca (calcium), N (nitrogen), and Dy (dysprosium). And besides, everybody in class was looking at us. Studying is actually very hard when all the people in the room are flashing you envious and churlish looks, you know.

When Avery looked around, everybody looked down. And I mean everybody, like EVERYBODY went back to their books simultaneously – like zombies controlled by an evil sorcerer, except that Avery isn't evil, and I absolutely have no qualms he is the most un-sorcerer-like person I know.

I looked at Avery with an amused smile on my face because of the whole zombie theory I was speculating. He looked back at me and furrowed his brows in a puzzled way, but with a smile nonetheless. You know, I could get used to his smiles. They make me feel better, like floating on air, or living Paris Hilton's live, even, but apparently not enough to make me feel BEST, because of the idiot who fell on a cursed pond an stole my heart just to kill it for fun. Ranma has done _that_ much damage to my personality.

"I don't get it," he mumbled. And I was confused because I thought he memorized the periodic table already, and I told him that. He went, "No, I meant the guy in red. _Kawaiikune_? _You_? Seriously."

I raised an eyebrow. Did he mean that I was seriously unattractive? But I was so dense in thinking that a guy like Avery would think like that, because he said afterwards, "You're cuter than the cutest thing there is."

And then he flashed that charming smile of his again.

I looked at him like he was Superman in the flesh. I didn't know what was happening to my face, but it made him chuckle.

"See? Look how cute you are when you're smiling like that."

Yeah, so I was smiling (probably in that stupid puppy dog manner again, I strongly suspect, but who cares? I don't, for one. Because if I was given that smile every single day of my life, I could just forget all my troubles and assume a new identity for myself, like a princess who always has her every whim come true. How great can that be? I can go like, "I order Ranma Saotome to kiss my feet and never call me names anymore," and he'd obey! Okay, enough dreaming).

All I could say is: _Kami-sama_, thank you for Avery Hanabishi, my new science tutor. The last thing I need is someone trampling on my self-confidence. Avery doesn't happen to be the type who tells people they're unattractive idiots.

You know, if only Ranma was supportive of me like that (and Avery's only been my friend for three days! Ranma's been my fiancé for almost a _year_), I'd absolutely give him a hug, maybe even a kiss on the cheek, and forgive him for all the times–

* * *

**Thursday, my room, where I wish I have the privacy that I need**

SAOTOME RANMA, I SWEAR IN THE NAME OF HELL THAT I AM GOING TO _KILL YOU!_

There I was, minding my own business with my diary, when you come crawling behind me like some Mufasa Lion King ready to pounce on his victim. Then you actually read my deepest thoughts that I wouldn't even reveal to P-chan, without thinking that YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO READ OTHER PEOPLE'S DIARIES unless the owner is dead and was quite famous in his time, and you're some kind of archaeologist who dug the diary up from under tons of volcanic dust!

I'm crying right now because Ranma had just read all about what happened today and how I feel about it, and him. I only noticed that he was looking over my shoulder while I was writing because I felt his warm breath upon my neck, and heard this choking sound next to my ear a few seconds later. I stopped writing, and I couldn't scream because I was too shocked. In my mind I was all, "Ohmigod, he knows, _he knows_…" 1000 miles a second. I slowly turned and faced him, and then I went, "RANMA… NO… _BAKA_!" while readying to take out the mallet from my pocket.

_Privacy_! Ranma Saotome, if you can't memorize the quadratic equation because you were in the first place lame at Math when you were a child, then you could have at least been good in vocabulary considering the fact that you have a wide terminology in terms of the insulting names you call me! PRIVACY!

I turned my head to the left and saw his face. He was as shocked as I was. Well, I couldn't blame him, because _he just found out that I take down every word he says and I have feelings for him_, courtesy of his nosing around in other people's businesses! He just found out that if he were supportive of me, I'd give him a hug and a kiss. He just found out EVERYTHING, which, I tell you, I had every intention of NOT telling him!

And that's when I just started to sob and threatened to bawl right then and there. I strongly ordered myself to run upstairs because it was humiliating enough that RANMA HAD JUST READ MY DIARY, and with it all the things I've been thinking about him that included the I-dread-the-time-it-would-be-discovered L-word.

I am so sure Ranma is laughing his heart out downstairs. He is so insensitive. I mean, it's bad enough that he's hacked into my innermost feelings, but he has to make it worse by ridiculing me! I hate him with all my heart, soul, and mind – I swear it in the name of my wet pillow, my wet P-chan, and my wet and sore eyes.

You know, I hate myself more because I'm so _stupid_, loving that _baka_ and hoping we'll be together. It's never going to happen. I'd rather go pull a sour grape act right now because that way I could throw all the insults I could throw at him, and not limit them, because he is not here to counter them all, or possibly throw even harsher offenses to me, because it's what he's been doing the moment he set foot in this household. If there's one way to put it, it's better that I affront him using this notebook, because at least I'm the only one enraged. All I want is peace. And yes, that statement is the enhanced edition of the original, which went:

All I want is peace with the love of my life.

Which, this time I promise, is not the thing I want right now. Because he's not the love of my life anymore. I am so sure. I don't love Ranma Saotome anymore because I am planning to kill him. And I don't kill the people I love.

Deduce conclusion: the L-word is not associated with the R-name to any further extent.

* * *

**Thursday, 9 pm**

After dinner, I took off like a peregrine falcon (National Geographic: the fastest flying bird) to my room. Ranma knocked on my door again, so I opened it, and didn't even care to take my mallet out. Because I gave him a black eye. Yeah, I slammed the door to his sorry face.

In addition to that, Ryouga showed up. He was very, very mad at Ranma for some reason. They were fighting near the koi pond, so I shouted out of my window, "You show him, Ryouga!" after Ryouga landed a punch in Ranma's stomach (why is it that whenever I cheer for Ryouga, Ranma always gets distracted? I know why: he's sidetracked – torn between fighting Ryouga and wanting to call me names, because it is, after all, in his nature). I wished Ryouga just used _Bakusai Tenketsu_, so Ranma's guts would just shatter into pieces. Okay, not shatter, but whatever word is suitable for the destruction of his guts. So literally, he'd have NO GUTS to call me names and sneak around like what he did this afternoon.

Ryouga went all weird when he heard me cheering him on; he almost fell into the water before Ranma caught his leg. When he discovered that his head hovered less than an inch above the water, he fainted.

I have no inkling about what's up with those two. They're like… brothers, in a way. Ranma always saves Ryouga from falling – into some body of water, mostly. But they always fight incessantly. And I hear it's always because of the same reason, but nobody wants to tell me.

Yes, world, unite as one and push me out of the circle. You all know everything, anyway, and I am just a powerless girl who has to live her bleak life every single day with a cursed fiancé who has a mouth that can throw me insults like a machine gun, a money-hungry sister, a stubborn father-uncle combo, a perverted old man obsessed with lingerie, the said cursed fiancé's three other fiancées, a pig-headed kendoist, and the Furinkan Hentai Horde (a hundred percent attendance every meeting, three hundred members and still counting).

Need to go. P-chan isn't feeling very well.

* * *

**Author's Notes:** Oooh, Avery's warming up. And Ryouga/P-chan isn't feeling well because he was a millimeter away from revealing his piggy secret in front of Akane when he and Ranma fought by the pond. I hope you liked the second chapter… if you did, do review! (",)

* * *

The-Shadow002: Thank you. I also think that this diary thing reveals Akane's feelings and thoughts better because she wrote it personally.

f-zelda: Thanks!

BrownAnime: I know, it's like she's brooding darkness in her heart with the suicide stuff. But don't worry, she'll see the light eventually. And yes, it's a diary, so naturally there are dates and locations and all that. (",)

KarmaDreamz: Maybe, maybe.

Vampire and Li: Glad you think it's great. Don't worry about dropping a review, whether you think it's boring or not. I appreciate your reviews all the same.

Story Weaver1: Yeah, I thought of that, but the world needs humor more than angst right now, don't you think? Anyway, there's more laughter in store in the next chapters.

Jake Marie: You know Ranma. He's a green-eyed monster. (",)

Lain Otowaki: There's more coming up.

Kean: Love that sentence, too. I got the idea from a thing called "Freudian Slips" in psychology, where you accidentally blurt out things from your unconscious. Things that are rather true, and/or describe your deep desires you dare not tell anybody.

Priestess Kohana: You think? Let's put him in it, then… haha… anyway, thank you!


	3. One Luck of A Headache

**Author's Notes:** From now on, I'll be posting each chapter twice – once for the whole chapter, the second time with my replies to your reviews. So if you've received a chapter update email for the second time, just ignore it. Or, you know, view it anyway to see my reply if you ever reviewed. (",)

**Disclaimer:** Not mine, not yours, but hers. Yes, I know that, thank you very much.

* * *

**The Diary of Akane Tendo**

**Chapter Three: One Luck of a Headache**

**Friday, December 3, school rooftop**

I vowed to give Ranma the silent treatment until I couldn't, which probably meant until the day I die. I hated him so much, letting him dance naked in front of the whole Nerima wouldn't have made me forgive him. For what? For everything, not just yesterday. For being _Ranma_. I know that's inequitable (again), but a grudge is something one cannot easily get rid of.

But I guess I can't now! Hate him, I mean. Because of what he did, I could never hate him now.

Avery asked me yesterday to come over his place for the study session he promised me during the whole O H Ca N Dy chemical symbols thing when I couldn't concentrate because of what Ranma had called me. He'll pick me up in the dojo at 10 tomorrow. I'm supposed to be thrilled right now, but I'm sorta not actually looking forward to seeing him. Because something happened.

You know, Avery has made a lot of friends in school. Every time he passes by the corridors, all the girls greet him and do all smarmy things, obviously fawning and squealing over his handsomeness and _Avery-ness_. Duh, I know, because I am his official royal companion most of the time. I go where he goes, and he goes where I go (because we almost always head to the same place, anyway). I mean, okay, I know that _fawning and squealing_ over a person is not the same as being a _friend_ of his, because it's just like, you know, girls fawning over Heath Ledger or someone, but Avery himself said that he considers them as friends. And, I guess, with that awesome personality of his, they consider him as their friend, too.

So the whole we've-been-hanging-out-together-incessantly thing started rumors, even though we have only started to go to the same place together last Wednesday at lunch. But then, one can go to a lot of places in this school of mine in one day, so it might as well have looked like… well, the thing the students have been suspecting about me and Avery.

When I entered the classroom this morning, the girls formed a mob around me. If I were somebody completely uninvolved with the picture and just speculating, I'd have thought that all of the girls were bullying a poor, helpless little lady (you know, the type in those school chick flicks where there's this newcomer who bumped into some evil sorority leader, so the whole bunch of female hooligans gang up around her and beat her up). But I wasn't, because alas, _I_ was the one being mobbed in the middle of the circle of the Avery-crazed girls.

Sayuri was going, "Akane! What's Avery like? How come you were together?"

I was stunned and I couldn't answer, so they bombarded me with more questions:

"Why are you always together? Is he like, courting you?"

"Is he your boyfriend now?"

"Is he a _prince_?"

_Come on, people_, I wanted to say. _Avery Hanabishi and I have just started hanging out during lunch last Wednesday, which explains the insignificant number of hours I've spent with him! That's only like, Thursday and half of Wednesday_ (Tuesday was the acquaintance stage; it doesn't count as significant, I guess)_. Can't you see the point? You cannot thoroughly know a person, and instantly be his girlfriend, in just a day and a half!_

Which was half true, if you ask me, because I did get to know Avery a lot during that period of time. But hey, it's not my fault the guy is so open with me, considering the fact that he thinks I'm the only decent person he could talk to besides the otherwise drooling ladies and defensive men.

And then someone just had to shout, "_DID YOU DITCH RANMA FOR AVERY_?"

The whole class fell silent all of a sudden. The boys (who were in a separate group away from _my mob_ in the other side of the room) all looked at us. Turns out they also formed a crowd around Avery, finally talking to him man to man. No doubt about what. There was a gap in both mobs, so I saw Avery looking at me, blushing, his face a question mark. I felt like blushing myself, until I saw Ranma by the window. He was looking at me with a was-that-true, incredulous expression on his face.

I am not even kidding. To say that MOB was the word of the day would be an understatement. The tongue is officially the most lethal weapon existing in this school. See what rumors could do? Rumors that, I should say, are just plain wrong, because: 1.) Avery is NOT courting me, 2.) he's NOT my boyfriend, and 3.) he's NOT a prince? I mean, as I said, he's the closest to a prince a guy could ever get, but that doesn't make him an _actual_ one, technically.

I was speechless. Well, wouldn't you, if you were in my place? If someone asked you that heinous question in front of everybody about ditching your fiancé in exchange for a newfound friend, wouldn't you be speechless?

After a moment, Yuka asked it again, in a whisper, but everybody was so silent that the whole class heard it.

"Akane and I are just friends," Avery answered finally.

The guys raised their eyebrows in suspicion (except Ranma – I saw him frozen in disbelief or something, thus hindering him from making any form of motion), and the girls looked at me for an assertion. And I gave them one.

"Yes, we're just _friends_."

Everybody heaved a sigh of relief. Then someone made the environment lighter by laughing, but the tension was very obvious. Everything was much better than the past five minutes, though I still couldn't figure out why the people were making such a big deal out of me and Avery accompanying each other. He's NEW, and there was nobody to show him around except me! Many girls might want to volunteer to be his guide around the school, but I doubt they'd do him any good because all they would probably do is stare at his handsome face and blabber incoherently. Still, everything was better.

Until somebody asked, "What about Ranma, though?"

Why, why, WHY do these things keep happening to me? Why can't they just happen to Osama Bin Laden or somebody, this feeling of apprehension and humiliation? Because, you know, if this kept happening to OBL, I'm pretty sure he'd turn himself in to the world army or something, because if he was always undergoing chagrin and trepidation, he'll go crazy – apparently enough to order his whole gang of terrorists to capitulate (hurrah, world peace. No more beauty queens who say "I believe what we need is world peace" in the question and answer portion of the pageant, where the question usually goes like: "In your opinion, what does the world urgently need right now?"). Then BBC, CNN, and NHK would film in their forsaken disordered lair, just like what happened to former Iraqi president Saddam Hussein. And they had to make it worse for him by filming his medical check-up, where he opened his unclean mouth wide and the doctor stuck in a popsicle stick – more degradation. That was really gross, especially to the 6, 7 billion people watching all over the world.

I _so_ do not want to be shown on international television with someone sticking a popsicle in my mouth, so I try to take a hold of myself every time I am mortified as to not resort to becoming crazy.

After the question about Ranma, I just stupidly stood there with everybody's eyes on me, and Ranma was looking at me with something I couldn't describe, other than incredulity. Anxiety?

"I… I-I…"

I was saved by the bell.

Everyone went back to their seats automatically, thus attesting my zombie theory (except this time Avery didn't do anything, hence disproving the part of the theory that Avery was the sorcerer controlling the zombies). The teacher had already entered the room, but I could still feel everybody's eyes on me.

I thought that maybe Avery would be all coy and weird because of what happened, and because of the awareness of the said link between us. But he wasn't. He passed me a note.

_What was that about? -Avery_

I don't know, it was like I was transported into the 15th century or something, and there was this angry mob coming to get me! -Akane

He chuckled when he read my reply.

_Maybe because we're always together. Yeah, that's it._

WHY are we always together, anyway?

_Well, you're the closest person to me in this school at the moment. When I start making friends, it's like they turn into jelly or something. I really couldn't understand them, especially the girls. The boys are a little… cold._

I'll talk to the guys. I don't want to be mobbed everyday, you know.

_Does that mean you don't want to keep me company anymore? _

No, course not! I enjoy being with you. But people here tend to link us as more than friends. And it's… WEIRD.

_Are we _just friends_, Akane?_

I was freaking out in my mind when I read it. What in the world was that supposed to mean? I think my face couldn't be painted. But it appears that our homeroom teacher found it to be… exceptionally prominent. My face, I mean. Because he walked up to me, grabbed the small piece of paper from my hand, and, without regard for my frantic prayers to _Kami-sama_, read it aloud, and warned us to quit passing notes during lectures.

I swear, I wanted to die. I wanted the floor to crack open and swallow me whole. I wanted to escape into Harry Potter's world and ride a Thunderbolt broomstick to escape into the mountains where Sirius Black and Buckbeak used to hide before Sirius died. I wanted a Black Hawk to appear right outside the window, then I'd crash the glass and jump in the helicopter that would fly me to Africa or somewhere.

When the homeroom teacher left the room, the class was murmuring. I was looking down on my desk; I couldn't take all of it. I mean, first, people link me as more than friends with a FRIEND. Then the said friend just asked if we were really just friends. Most of all, people think I've ditched the love of my life for him!

Ugh. I don't believe I just called Ranma the love of my life. Why can't I keep myself from falling in love with someone like him?

Oh. Because I have already fallen in love with him! With Ranma Saotome (I think)!

Why? I'll tell you why.

While suffering the minutes waiting for the math teacher to arrive, I was looking down on my desk. Everybody was talking about the note. I even caught a glimpse of Avery looking down on his desk, too. I heard what everybody was talking about, because I wasn't absorbed in a conversation with anybody, because they just wanted to talk among themselves, because it was like I wasn't there. That, and/or they thought I was deaf.

"What was that note about?"

"Avery obviously likes Akane. But Akane already has Ranma, right?"

"But there's a possibility she's ditching him!"

"Yeah, they're always arguing. And Avery's really nice to Akane. I couldn't blame her if she falls in love with him – he's perfect!"

I couldn't really see Ranma because he was seated behind me. The gossips squeezed into my ears, then my brain, until it started to throb, like some computer on overload and at the brink of crashing. Let's say the computer model Celeron's being fed too much data and the disk space is full… and so I wanted to cry – so, so much.

The moment the math teacher entered the classroom, I said I had a terrible headache (which was true, so that's a point off my Lies Told record) and quickly excused myself. I was seriously on the edge of crying in front of everyone, which, I tell you, is totally not a good feeling, on account of the fact that it is HUMILIATING, which is the second word of the day. I slammed the door behind me and ran to the clinic to get some medicine, and to get away from those horrible, tactless people.

Okay, you'd think it ends there. But it doesn't.

I was bawling in the clinic as I sat there in front of the nurse's desk. I told the nurse that I was crying because of the headache. It was true – I mean, the headache was as EXCRUCIATING as _hell_. But then, basically I was sobbing my heart out because of what happened. It was all too much.

And the next thing I knew, I felt someone's hand on my shoulder. I expected the nurse to hand me the medicine, but when I looked up, I saw – believe it! – RANMA. I went, "What are you doing here? You want to talk about me too, like I'm deaf or something?" I sobbed all over myself back there that it's a wonder why he didn't leave.

"No," he said. "I… okay, I admit I was shocked with… what just happened back there–"

"So you believe that, too?" I couldn't believe that Ranma of all people would do what the others did. He was in fact the person closest to me in the classroom, and I thought he'd have at least some sympathy for me!

"BUT," he continued, and I sobbed again. "Akane, come on, you've got to listen…"

He held my chin gently and raised my head so he could see my face. I shook my head away but he held it still. You know, like in those romance movies that make girls squeal so much. And what's better was that I was in one of them! I mean, okay, if I were the Akane Tendo that I was almost a year ago, just after I've met Ranma Saotome, I'd have thought that the male lead was brute kid who loved calling me names and was just taking his chance with me because of his _hentai_ ways. But I'm not. And I realized that Ranma's been revealing his sensitive side a few nights ago, for some reason.

"Akane," he pleaded. "Would you really expect me to believe that crap? Please," he said softly, wiping my tears with the thumb of his other hand, "stop crying."

In my mind, I was all, "Shut up. You're lying." But I thought that was really something cruel to say because he, after all, put his efforts into chasing me all the way to the clinic, so what I really said to him was, "No, _baka_. You should have seen your face back there. You believed it. And stop making me believe you actually care."

I mean, come on. After that rage session I had last night because of his invasion of my privacy and calling me _kawaiikune_ in front of everybody in study period, I've forgotten all the nice things he'd said to me three nights ago. Again, not my fault.

"Oh, honey," the nurse sighed, hearing me cry harder upon entering the scene. She obviously didn't hear what we were talking about because she went, "Miss Tendo, your head hurts that much? Take the medicine and just stay here in the clinic."

Ranma let go of my chin and took a step back to make way for the nurse.

"Come here, honey," she said gently as she helped me up from the chair and led me to the next room that looked very much like the one in Dr. Tofu's place. She made me lie down on one of the beds and left to get a glass of water.

Ranma entered the room and the moment I saw him, I turned my head the other way, facing the window. I mean, hello, what he was saying was totally the opposite of his expression in the classroom! And, well, I couldn't help but do some drama, as I was getting into the romantic movie milieu. I figured that out just now, but it felt real that time.

My face was still wet because of the tears. "Akane," he started. When I didn't say anything, I just found the light from the window being blocked by his figure, because he moved to the other side of the bed. I didn't move my head anymore because it hurt so much.

He sat down on one of the chairs beside the bed and leaned close. "Akane, don't let yourself be affected by these small things. You know very well that I don't believe what our classmates were saying. So it's… it's just STUPID for you to–"

"Why?" I interrupted, in spite of the throbbing headache I was having. "Why didn't you believe it? The proof was right there in the note. All of them think Avery and I are actually more than friends now. I just don't get it, Ranma. I mean, it's _you_ who's in trouble. People think you've been ditched. Isn't that just insulting?"

I just wanted to do a little testing is all. Because I wanted to know if the guy I was talking to was still Ranma, or just that Copycat Ken guy. Clearly, he was not acting like how I'd expected Ranma to. I mean, Ranma would be insightful when I am hurt, as what always happened in the past, but not _this_ insightful! You know, the whole holding-my-chin and wiping-my-tears thing. So if his answer was the one the REAL Ranma would have said, then I wasn't setting my mallet on him.

He blushed. Or maybe I was just seeing red because I was dying or something (no, that time I was not glad at that fact because I wanted to live and know what he thought about it), as the headache was getting stronger and more painful.

"Yes, it's insulting!" Ranma grumbled heatedly. "Of course it is! What do you think of me, a hermit who doesn't have a social life and a reputation to take care of?"

Oh yes, that was Ranma all right. And I thought to myself, _Akane, you've been silly for having been moved with his heart warming gestures. No need for the mallet to be revived, after all._

And I guess I had a crestfallen look painted on my face, because he was suddenly startled and stammered an apology.

"It hit my pride, certainly," he went on, referring to the ditching rumor. "But… I think the people back there in the classroom took in the words without understanding them, because… y-you never gave your answer to his question about you being just friends, did you? So that means you're _just friends_, right?" He had this hopeful, anxious look on his face, which I guess made him look cute. But I wasn't thinking about that back then, of course.

"YES, we're just friends." Imagine how much younger he looked without those skeptic wrinkles on his face! It's like he was a hundred times happier. "It's just that we're always together. He told me that you guys were cold towards him. And the girls… well, they aren't sane when he's there."

His face scrunched up into a small frown. "Well, I'll try to make friends." Then his face had this different look, like halfway toward a smile and the urge to hug – just to achieve comforting human contact. "Remember, things are going to be okay. People are not going to think there's something wrong because… because… you're not ditching me, right?"

I blinked. Did I just hear correctly what he said?

But then, my hidden feelings for Ranma were fighting their way out, and what I answered was, "No, I'm not ditching you," before the nurse entered with a glass of water. So that's like saying we're officially an item (we actually don't regard each other as fiancées even if we are in the eyes of everybody, but then saying I'm not ditching him would mean we in fact deem each other as fiancées!) and maybe… he has feelings for me after all!

When the nurse asked him to leave, he bargained for a minute, and the nurse gave it to him and headed outside after putting the glass of water on the side table beside my medicine and telling Ranma he'd have to help me take in my medication. I thought I couldn't be happier. I mean, it's _Ranma_ we're talking about, and he just wanted to stay with me some more!

But I found out later that I _could_ be happier. When the nurse left, my eyes followed her, and when my head turned, it really hurt that I whimpered in pain. He panicked, but in seconds he held my head gently and I looked at him. He smiled at me, and I think the headache was gone. Most of it, anyway. The next thing he did was take out a handkerchief from his pocket and he wiped my wet face with it. He helped me sit up and take in my medicine. After I swallowed the tablet, he slowly laid me back to bed. "You feeling okay now, Akane?"

"Yes, thanks."

Then he looked outside the door and nodded, which meant the nurse was already calling him out. "I have to go now. Get well, okay? Drink lots of water, and sleep all you want. If you're still asleep by dismissal time, I'll just carry you home. And–"

"Ranma, I'm going to be fine," I insisted weakly. But I was smiling because I was amused with his tone – he was frantically saying stuff to make me feel better. And it worked! I could tell by his look that he didn't want to go.

"Okay…" his voice trailed off because he couldn't talk at that moment. He couldn't talk at that moment because he KISSED ME!

RANMA SAOTOME KISSED ME ON THE FOREHEAD! I mean, I know, it's just the forehead. BUT HE STILL KISSED ME! I really thought it was just some lovely nightmare (hah! Paradoxes!) but when I woke up at 3 pm, the nurse told me it was true (she was by the door when Ranma did it).

"I'll be back," he bade, and then he walked out of the room. Wasn't that just sweet of him? I swear, right now, I am totally taking back that I hate him. Because my feelings of love (cannot find any other word that could explain my emotion. If that word existed, I'd put it there instead of _love_, but it's inexistent) towards him have recuperated. I just don't know if it's going to last… because… ugh, just for some reason.

Okay. So I'm here on the school rooftop because I woke up before dismissal, and I told the nurse that I'm fine and I'll go back to class. But I didn't – I went straight to this deserted place because I have to write down what happened!

Everything seems fine. Except the Avery part. Why did he ask if we were really just friends? What did that mean? Like he wants to be more than friends or something? I don't get Avery. His last question in the note did it. But then… I know there must be an explanation…

* * *

**Friday, my room **

One of the first close contacts I had with Ranma was when he turned into a she and she was half-asleep. I carried her on my back on the way home. The next ones were usually the opposite. He was the one who carried me because I was typically hurt all the time. I always got into trouble. That always gave him the reason to reprimand me and call me _baka_.

I don't know, but I guess being in Ranma's arms makes me feel safe. It doesn't matter if we're being chased by some crazed amazon, a crazed cook, a crazed gymnast, or all sorts of crazed creatures. It doesn't matter if he's running so fast, even though I have this little fear that he might accidentally toss me, because I trust him. I trust the way he handles me because I know he's never going to desert me.

Yeah, the whole time I hated him, that piece of reminder was always etched in my mind. So I never FULLY hated him.

And I don't think I ever could again.

While sitting on the rooftop, right after I closed my journal and decided to just watch the sky, the Kendo Club entered the scene to practice. And yep, Kuno was all Shakespeare again when he saw me. He sat down beside me and ordered the club to go on with their training. Here's our exchange of conversation:

Kuno: Tendo Akane, why art thou sitting solitarily in this bare place? A rose like thee is not befit to stay alone in a place like this! Good fortune comes to you, for I am here to–

Me: Kuno sempai, it's okay. I was leaving anyway. Just… go on with your Kendo or something.

Kuno: You look rather forlorn.

Me: I'm not. I'm happy.

Kuno: With an untrue fiancé like Saotome? It's a wonder why you are.

Me: He isn't untrue or anything. He's Ranma. Oh, what am I doing here talking to you? I should be in my class. Or you know, peeling potatoes instead of being here.

Kuno (not realizing the supposed-to-be piece of rudeness I gave him): Then why art thou here on this forsaken place?

Me: I had this terrible headache and I was rushed to the clinic. I slept for a few hours and woke up, so I headed here to breathe some fresh air. My head still hurts a little, but I think I'll go back to class now.

I started to get up, and to my surprise, Kuno helped me up. Just like a _normal gentleman_.

Kuno: Then thou shall get well, for angels like thee do not deserve to go under worldly sufferings. You wish me to accompany thee to thy class, I suppose?

My mouth was agape and my eyebrows were raised to the ninth power. Honestly, it was like my whole world turned upside-down today!

Me (managed to speak): N-no, thanks… I-I'll go now. Bye.

Kuno: Uh… Wait.

He took my hand and kneeled down. The rest of the Kendo club had their heads together, gawking at what Kuno just did. And if my heart was a person, she'd probably be gawking as well while she was going lub-dub, lub-dub loudly like a bongo drum. I mean, okay, this was KUNO and I have totally no interest in him, but what he did was so sudden that it was worthy of a couple of quick heartbeats. It scared me, actually. What in the world was happening, a _marriage proposal?_

He looked up at me for a few seconds, his face unwrinkled, unmoving, trying to put on this I'm-your-prince-I've-come-to-rescue-you-my-princess expression.

Me: Er… what?

Kuno: Will you go with me to the Winter Dance next week?

Me: Oh.

It was no marriage proposal after all, thank _Kami-sama_, but oh crud – that's when I realized that I still don't have a partner for the Winter Dance!

He looked anxious. And I wasn't tempted to say yes then and there. Even if he was all gentlemanly then, he'd most probably return to his usual Kuno self – the egotistic, weird one.

Me: Um, thanks. For asking, I mean. But I…

_Don't want to go to the dance with a lunatic like you!_

Kuno (just after my quick intake of breath and my unfinished answer): 'Tis all right. I understand.

I don't know if he knew what explanation I had in mind, but whatever. As quickly as I could, I bade goodbye and walked out of the door. I was super freaked out and it made my head hurt again. So I went back to the clinic. I mean, I wasn't ready to face my classmates yet. The nurse was surprised to see me, but I said I really needed some more rest because my head started to hurt again. So she gave me the same medicine and let me rest on the same bed.

I don't know what happened, but the next thing I knew, I felt like I was floating on air. There was this steady tip-tap sound somewhere below. When I opened my eyes, I saw Ranma's face looking ahead, the sky in the background. So I figured it was just a dream. You know – the sky, Ranma. Heaven was a dream for me. Either that or I had died (I'd rather go for the former).

When I felt his two arms supporting my shoulders and legs, I knew he was carrying me. But then, you know, I wasn't really stupid or anything to kiss him right there, even if I thought it was a dream. I just called out his name in a soft whisper, and he looked down.

"A-Akane!"

"Ranma, what's going on? Why are you carrying me?"

He continued walking. After a few seconds, he said, "Like I told you, if you're still asleep by dismissal time, I'll carry you home. I didn't want to wake you up because you're still weak. Your headache might return. And if it does, you're going to worry everybody. We don't want that to happen."

Then he took a deep breath, and I felt his upper body's muscles press on me. He was warm. And it felt nice, that I smiled at him. It was then that I realized I wasn't in a dream.

He awkwardly smiled back. "So… you okay now?"

I just snuggled close and buried my face in his chest. "Yeah, thanks."

That was it. Maybe having read my diary yesterday caused him to act like that, but neither of us said a word about my diary or its contents. Which avoided the most probable effect of me being uncomfortable during the trip back home, thank you very much. And wasn't that just sweet? I mean, I ignored the fact that he called me weak. Because it was true. I was weak a few hours ago. But right now, I am totally reenergized because Ranma just carried me home like a princess being carried by her prince!

Oooh, I wonder when he's going to ask me to come with him to the dance? Maybe he thought it was a bad time to ask a while ago. All I have to do is be patient, I guess…

So, anyway, when I came home, I didn't tell anybody about my headache. Nor did Ranma. I don't know, I think we both know that what happened was supposed to be only between us. Like some telepathy or something. So, you know, I didn't have to worry about the family knowing, or else they'd fret about me and all.

What I'm worrying about is what I should do next.

I don't want to be sweet all of a sudden. What am I going to do tomorrow? Fake it all up and be all grumpy again? No, I most certainly won't! Things like what happened don't happen everyday. I'll just act nicer, but not all lovey-dovey. I wonder how I'm going to pull this off.

Wait. So what's going to happen, then? What if Ranma won't make a move? Worse, what if he was just forced to do it (carry me home while I'm asleep) because he didn't want his _kawaiikune_ fiancé to badger him about stuff on the way home?

I so do not like the mystery that surrounds this world.

* * *

**Author's Notes:** Yeah, well, NHK is the only Japanese television channel I know (refer to the Bin Laden paragraph). They have it here in my country on cable, for some reason. And also after the teacher read Avery and Akane's note, Akane made some Harry Potter and Black Hawk Down references. And that was just for fun again. ;)

Now, I know this chapter's sort of dramatic. Forgive me, because I just watched an episode of some Mexican soap opera and have been terribly moved, because it's one of those episodes where the leading lady starts crying and the leading man embraces her and all that blah. Please review. (",)

* * *

Ikerana: Curious, huh? I know many people are. And don't worry, there's going to be a platter of love and chocolate coming up!

Baron Hausenpheffer: Thanks! Many people actually try to write in diary mode but fail to do so. Don't fret, all the angst will soon ebb. She'll lighten up.

Itssotaken: Negatively OOC? Who knows? Maybe Akane's been feeling that way during the anime series, but we just didn't know it… until I sneaked into her room and stole her diary for me to publish it online. Anyway, thanks. (",)

hashiba42: Thank you!

Koala Kitty: Yes, the hormones. Thanks for commending the character writing!

KarmaDreamz: I will update of course, so keep reading to find out.

The-Shadow002: The apology! I love it as well. You know Ranma – he messes things up, settles them, and messes them up again.

Story Weaver1: I thought Ranma's apology was cute, too. He rarely shows that side of him in the series. As for Ranma and Avery, keep reading to find out if they ever come to a head.

ashmidnight92: Thanks!

Jace3: Glad you think it's well done and cool, and that it sounds like a diary. Thanks so much. (",)

Priestess Kohana: Thank you! And yes, it's a Ranma-Akane fic.

a reader: Well, that's Akane and it's in her nature. However, I might want to point out that Ranma and Akane are still in the our-parents-forced-us-into-this-whole-fiancé-thing-and-we-don't-agree-we-don't-want-to-have-anything-to-do-with-it stage, so naturally both of them would think that if he/she starts seeing other people with the opposite gender, the other would not care.

alanna: Yes, life. That's what I write about, since I am coursing through it everyday. (",)


	4. Tutor, Tutee, and Kiss Stealer

**Author's Notes:** I am terribly sorry for the long wait. I'd already finished the fourth chapter weeks ago, but it had a totally different content. After hours of contemplating, I decided that it wouldn't do, so I replaced it to come up with this.

**Disclaimer:** Not mine, not yours, but hers. But Avery's my creation, and let's just leave it to that.

* * *

**The Diary of Akane Tendo**

**Chapter Four: Tutor, Tutee, and Kiss Stealer**

**Saturday, December 4, the little balcony outside my room**

The winter breeze is making me shiver right now.

Fresh air always does me good. I mean, even though Japan already uses electricity-run cars and all that electricity-run stuff so what we breathe is pollution-free, there is still a considerable amount of carbon monoxide in the air that might harm us and disrupt our bodily functions.

carbon monoxide is CO

sodium hydroxide is NaOH

hydrobromic acid is HBr

And that's about the end of my knowledge in the present science lesson. This is because I haven't been able to concentrate with my lessons on account of the fact that I (together with Avery and Ranma) am the present subject of most school gossips. The fresh winter air sort of dilutes the pollution in my brain in order for me to think straight, because for the past few days I have earned enough credit in being a crazed lunatic that I wouldn't be surprised if I'd become like, Kodachi Kuno's roommate in the psychiatric ward.

It was early, early, _early_ in the morning. And since I slept late last night, I expected to wake up around 12 noon. Seriously. Just after writing the last word in this journal a great sense of fatigue rushed into me, out of nowhere. But I didn't. Wake up late, I mean. Because suddenly, without warning or reason, I sat up on my bed. I wasn't even sweaty or anything; I didn't have any nightmares last night. I just abruptly sat up, just before the sun rose.

So I woke up, right? And I asked myself, as the pink sky greeted me a good morning, how and why I responded to an invisible stimulus with such a sudden action. It was so unexplainable. And until now, it still freaks me out, because nothing I know about psychology could clarify it. Maybe… maybe it's an omen that I am near death or something. One morning, I would do the same thing and sit up all of a sudden, only it's going to be my soul doing that and my body would still be lying comfortably warm on my bed.

No, make that comfortably _cold_.

Because maybe the reason for my death would be the fact that I forgot to close my window or the door to the balcony one winter night when a wild frosty storm attacks Nerima. I had frozen to death. And so my soul would bid farewell to my helpless little body with these words:

"_Sayonara_, little girl who was stupid enough to have forgotten to close her windows on a cold, raging winter night. You earn the title of little frozen snowdrop now."

And then I'd give the world a last pained smile before floating towards the heavens.

Oh, how I wish my death would be as easy as that. Because, you know, I've always liked peaceful deaths. Not the type where the cause of one's death was eating a dish with poison and vomiting until there's nothing else to vomit, or having been strangled to death by a foe or by a devious plant (Harry Potter and The Order of The Phoenix – Mr. Bode was strangled by _Devil's Snare!_ I would never want to die like that) delivered anonymously by the said foe.

Why do my thoughts drift off a lot nowadays?

Okay. So I woke up. And since I was confused because I didn't know the reason why I sat up so quickly, I donned my gi and headed to the dojo. It is my sanctuary (well, next to my room). Whenever I feel depressed or angry or whatever emotion I am feeling that needs to be let out, I punch and kick and practice my katas until I feel better. So that's what I did this morning in order to let my libido out (psychology: libido is the general suppressed energy inside any living creature, and not just sexual as other people think. Two claps for Dr. Phil). Only I don't know where the libido came from this time, unlike last time when I went screaming into the night, because as I said I wasn't angry or anything this morning.

After sweating it out, I took a bath. I shampooed my hair and used my favorite berry-scented soap on my body. I pulled on my beige capris and slipped into my striped orange tank top. I felt as fresh as a field of flowers right after a morning drizzle. And I felt even fresher when I stepped out the room to my little balcony.

Yet now, I still can't put my finger on why I felt weird, troubled, disturbed. I know I'm making a big deal out of this, but heck – this has never happened to me before. Not when I first met Kuno, not when I realized the unkind fact that I've been playing male roles in school plays for, like, EVER.

I mean, okay. It's not as if I'm _that_ unlucky.

1.) Even though my mother is not alive anymore, I have a father who loves me as much as she loved me. And I know that mom's watching over me all the time.

2.) Even though I can't cook, I have Kasumi to feed me whenever I am hungry. And yes, her cooking is excellent that if ever she opens a restaurant in Nerima, it would soon be the biggest restaurant chain in the whole world.

3.) Even though I am not actually the best martial artist in this dojo, I can still kick any _hentai's_ ass big time.

4.) Even though I am totally distracted with my lessons nowadays, I am still smart enough to cope up with them when I am feeling a little better already (I hope).

5.) Even though Ranma and I have been forced into an engagement that we hated at first, I think both of us are getting along fine these days. He has actually turned a little sensitive and has apologized for some of his mistakes; he aided me when I much needed his help, like yesterday when the headache took over me and he carried me home. He even kissed me on the forehead in the process, which was really, really, really (1000x) sweet and spine-tingling in this totally positive way! If I didn't know better, I'd have thought he's under some kind of mind control, but whatever.

6.) Even though it is utterly disgusting, despicable, dislikeable, etcetera, I have a horde of _hentais_ welcoming me everyday in school, ready to obey my every command. They'd probably jump into a lake full of crocodiles and/or leeches for me.

I mean, okay, I'm not _that_ evil as to tell them to do that, but I'm just stating facts here. Luckily enough, half of them are not at all bad looking. It's just the fact that they're in the Furinkan High Hentai Horde that makes them such turnoffs. But really, not all of them are ugly. Some of them might be the type girls in school would want to go with to the dance. Deduce conclusion: I am not that unlucky after all.

Oh _Kami-sama_. I just remembered.

THE WINTER DANCE!

It's in less than a week and I still don't have a partner – Ranma hasn't asked me yet! I hope he remembers, the forgetful _baka_. I mean, after what happened yesterday, he isn't supposed to forget to ask! Or, you know. Avery. But I will resort to him only when–

Oh _Kami-sama_ again.

Avery and I are supposed to have a study session today at 10! He offered to tutor me because he noticed that I started having difficulty concentrating on our lessons on that day when he helped me with science during study period – the time Ranma gave me a stupid reply when I asked him to join us, thus disabling me from concentrating on what Avery was telling me about oxygen, hydrogen, calcium, nitrogen, and dysprosium (aka the O H Ca N Dy elements, the ones whose discovery and properties I should have memorized a long time ago).

So _that's_ what I woke up so early in the morning for! I have no date for the Winter Dance. And I completely forgot about the study session with Avery (who, I just remembered, asked me yesterday if we were really just friends. Oh, crud). These things have been tugging on my unconscious. I am so hopeless.

I have absolutely no reason to present how I forgot. If I were a woman who had just recently reached her half life and is on her menopausal stage, being forgetful might be excusable. But unfortunately, I am not a woman who had just recently reached her half life and is on her menopausal stage. I am, instead, a tomboy whom nobody wants to go to the dance with. A tomboy who, moreover, has so much libido inside of her that her only defense mechanism functional is screaming out loud in the middle of the night (suicidal threats included).

Oh, what am I thinking?

I am Akane Tendo. Akane Tendo, the girl whom "_Kami-sama_ has never burdened with unbearable things," the girl who "should be confident with herself because she's one of the best girls around," the girl who is "smart, strong and cute," the girl who is "cuter than the cutest thing there is."

Someone's knocking at my door. It's Kasumi. I go inside my room. She says that Avery's here!

* * *

**Saturday, the big marble balcony outside Avery's mansion**

I have seen the world's goodness in Avery's eyes. It's like I've been living in the dark, with only a few stars twinkling dimly above me in a great big blanket of night sky, until Avery came, gave me a super telescope, and made me focus on a particular little star, only to realize that it is actually another sun, blazing with all its hot gas glory – only it's a bazillion gazillion miles farther.

So I was writing in my balcony when Kasumi knocked and told me that Avery was waiting for me downstairs, right? I immediately thanked Fate that I'd planned a feel-good day, that I was wearing nice clothes, and that I smelled like a basket of sweet berries. I mean, what were the chances? If it was any ordinary weekend, I'd still be in my pajamas, smelling like the day before.

Carrying my school stuff, I rushed downstairs (with my heart drumming against my chest, because I didn't know what to do or how to act on account of the fact that he asked me the "Are we just friends?" question yesterday) to find Avery sitting by the dining table, facing the koi pond outside. His peaceful emerald orbs reflected the color of the green grass, and I was just thinking, _Oh Kami, he has the most beautiful eyes I have ever seen. They are the perfect complement to his brown hair. They are the perfect complement to his pale face. They are the perfect complement to his pink lips. His eyes are _perfect.

In fact, they were so utterly perfect that I was already lost in their perfection before I noticed that Avery was looking at me already.

"Akane?"

I observed the way they widened in bliss when they saw me. And then my attention traveled to his lips, which were actually very nice. They look like if I kissed them, they'd be very soft. They opened and closed for a second ("Akane…" he called out. I was almost embarrassed, because staring at a boy's lips with him catching you red-handed is actually worthy of the adjective _embarrassing_), and it was then that I snapped back to reality.

"Oh!"

"Are you okay?" he asked, smiling his Avery smile as he got up, approached me, and carried my stuff.

"Y-yeah." I shook off the temptation of looking at his lips once more, and smiled back. It may have been a little tense because of the aftershock of yesterday's tension, though.

We made our way outside the house and were almost there at the gate, when we heard a loud _SPLASH_ from the koi pond. I rolled my eyes, because whoever could it be but Ranma and Uncle Genma sharing their father-son affection, their daily routine every morning? Avery and I hurried to the pond where we saw a giant panda sitting miserably in the water ("Whoah! You have a panda here?"), with a smirking Ranma a few feet away. Before Ranma could throw a wicked remark, the giant panda pulled a Bruce Lee and attacked (with matching hand actions; if it had made the "Hiyaaa!" sound, it would have been a perfect spoof).

"Isn't Ranma going to get hurt? Pandas can be very aggressive," Avery noted, his tone more curious than worried.

I giggled. "Don't worry, that panda won't kill him."

Turns out, Avery was totally amazed that the panda knew wicked martial arts. He said he's seen trained pandas in the circus, but none of them were as amazing as the one in front of him, delivering jabs and kicks – practically sparring relentlessly with a human, and having enough skills to cope – until it flew (after Ranma kicked its stomach) and landed right on the spot in front of where Avery and I were standing.

"Hah!" Ranma gloated. I guess, because of the bursting feeling of victory into his heart, he didn't see us until he actually jumped right next to Uncle Genma. "Pop, you're really–"

"Hi, uh… Ranma Saotome," Avery greeted warmly. Yes, that was the first time they met face to face and exchanged a few words with each other. And I was so worried that it would lead to monosyllabic replies from each other, or, _Kami_ forbid, words that aren't even in the dictionary. Even _I_ felt the tension between the two of them. What's with guys, anyway? Why do they always see each other as rivals in some twisted, if not rational, way, and would even find something to fight about when there is none? And with the way things were going in my mad imagination, it was like I was transported to the Stone Age.

The way I could have seen it if they'd been heating up:

Avery: Hi, dugh… Saotome. Ungga.

Ranma: Hanabishi. Ungga (red aura glowing around body).

Avery: Dugh… fight panda dangerous.

Ranma: Me strong. Ungga. Me beat anybody. Me beat you. Ungga (thumps on chest wildly).

Avery: Me not doing anything. But since you ask, will give you what you want. Dugh…

Ranma: (takes out heavy wooden club) Me stronger than you.

Avery: (brows furrow) You not have manners, fighting in front of girl (turns around, looking at me).

Ranma: Dugh… Ungga (lunges at Avery anyway).

AND THANK _KAMI-SAMA_ THEY DIDN'T HEAT UP. I didn't want cavemen fighting in the vicinity of my home, for crying out loud. More importantly, I didn't want to see Avery and Ranma exchange sparks of anger between their eyes, because they are both good people and there is like, totally no reason for them to fight.

Except for me. That is, if ever Ranma and Avery are both madly in love with me and are fighting for my affection. Which, of course, the chances are totally nil. Nada. Haha. Because if even one of them does love me, _he'd have asked me to the Winter Dance a long time ago._

Anyway, Ranma looked taken aback, seeing Avery with me. "H-hi… what are you doing here?" His tone, thankfully, had no indications of anger or any related word.

"I'm just fetching Akane because we're going to study at my place. Want to come?"

Unlike the last time when I asked Ranma if he wanted to study with us, he didn't say "_Kawaiikune_!" due to any unstoppable impulse of his. He didn't get a chance to say anything, actually, because when his mouth opened as he was about to answer, Uncle Genma the panda landed a kick on his stomach and sent him flying towards the koi pond, continuing the sparring.

Avery didn't want to go because he was anxious about the battle, but when I saw Ranma transform into female upon hitting the water, I insisted that he would be okay as I put my hands on Avery's shoulders and pushed him outside where a black limousine was waiting for us.

The trip to his place took almost half an hour. I was figuring that maybe his place would be a haunted mansion or something, that's why it's far.

But more important thoughts were running through my head – I was thinking about Avery (who sat just inches beside me, with the Glade-scented air filling the small gap in between us) and how nice he's really been to me. There's nothing I could be uncomfortable with when it comes to him. Well, maybe nothing, except the fact that he's done so many good things to me and I haven't even repaid his kindness.

_UM, AND HELLO, AKANE, THE WHOLE "ARE WE JUST FRIENDS" THING THAT HE WROTE IN THE NOTE YESTERDAY_, I reminded myself. No way was I pulling a forgot-because-of-menopause stunt.

"I hope you're not mad about yesterday," he started softly. He took his eyes off the city outside and looked at me. "It was just meant to be a joke to cheer you up. The whole time you were in the clinic, my conscience was killing me."

A joke. It was meant to be _a joke_! I should have seen it coming – Avery was _so not_ the trouble-maker type. When things were grave, such as the incident yesterday when I was in a really tight spot, he wouldn't make things tighter for you. Instead, he would loosen things up to help you breathe. Yesterday, he did it with a joke. A joke that I had totally misunderstood because I was caught up with so much negativity.

"I tried to catch you after school, but–"

"Avery."

"–you were sleeping in the clinic and I didn't want to wake you up–"

"Avery!" I said a little more insistently than I intended that he blinked his beautiful emerald eyes wide open in surprise. "I'm not mad. NOT, okay? Not mad. If I were, I wouldn't be here, wouldn't I?" I flashed him an assuring smile. It was like the two of us have been reversed – it was always him who flashed me assuring smiles that made me feel comfortable or calmed me down or made me feel less tense or made me feel okay. Deep in my mind, I was grinning, because he heaved a sigh of relief (which was so totally audible considering we were inside the limo, an enclosed space) that made him look like a child who thought he was in hot water until his mother forgave him.

"Thank you," he murmured, his eyes serene.

"No, Avery, thank _you_. I don't know how to… how to repay the kindness you've shown me, even though we've known each other for just a few days. You were always there to help me and all, but I've never done anything in return. I feel pretty uncomfortable when I'm with you because of that." I looked outside the window.

A thorn off my chest. And I just realized it now, but I've been hoping he'd ask me out to the Winter Dance in the limo. I was all, _ask me out NOW. Now, Avery. Ask it already! Before the deadline arrives and I wouldn't have any date for the dance, because everyone else is taken._

Well yeah, there's Ranma. But at that moment, since Avery was right there, I had to hope for the nearest thing that could happen.

"Akane," he started. I looked up at him and he was smiling at me with his eyes blazing green as always, which made him look really cute. "I don't want anything in return. And besides, your company is everything I need. It's more than enough. You know, when I moved to Furinkan, you were my friend since the first day. I don't think you've realized, but it means really a lot to me. It's more than I could ever ask for."

I smiled back. Avery Hanabishi is such a great friend. Dr. Phil doesn't have to psychoanalyze him and tell me that for me to figure it out.

So I'm here in his mansion (no, it isn't haunted after all) on the third floor balcony. The place is located somewhere on a hill, and the view's great – there's this cherry blossom forest, evergreens, trees with golden leaves falling, trees without leaves at all, and all that nature. It's a sight for sore eyes. Avery fulfilled my wish – to see from a high place the view of nature's colors. It had been chilly when I first stepped into the marble balcony, considering that I was wearing a tank top and it was December and we were atop a hill, but Avery let me borrow a white fur overcoat that feels so familiar… like a giant bun warmer.

The table in front of me is occupied by school and reference books and notebooks. So far, I've memorized the periodic table of elements, the history/discovery of the O H Ca N Dy elements, the quadratic equation, and all about muscle cramps. We've already started on Fidel Castro and did an advance reading on a part of Cuba's history.

I've got to hand it to Avery - he really does know how to study. He's not here because he went to get a Philippine history book from the library on the second floor. And he did it by himself considering the fact that this mansion has many servants. I mean, if I lived a life like this, I'd have abused it before you could say "Winter Dance."

Oh, Avery's here, carrying a book as thick as an elephant's trunk. He says that after we summarize Ferdinand Marcos, he's going to accompany me back to my house. Calling this guy assiduous wouldn't bring him justice. Honestly!

* * *

**Saturday, Avery's limo**

It's like 5 pm. Avery _did_ say when were studying that he'll have me home before dark, and he kept his promise. I wish he didn't. I'm going to miss the big bun warmer slash white fur overcoat that's wrapped around me right now. I wonder if it's made out of real polar bear fur. That would have to be bad, because killing animals for clothes is evil. Then I'd have seen something bad in Avery. I mean, okay, it's not as if I'm looking for a teeny tiny hole in Avery's perfect personality, but I've been thinking… if he didn't have any flaws, that would make him _not human_!

But if he's like that now, I wish he'd be _not human_ all his life. He's sooo nice. He's the reason why I feel sleepy now – sleeping in this totally warm, positive way – because we ate so much Italian and French delicacies prepared by his chef (yes, he has a personal chef) and drank some red wine (it's good for the health!) while we were studying. He's the reason why I finally caught up with the lessons in school, because he's been patient in teaching me. And he is such a great teacher – even if I were the dumbest person on the planet, I bet I could still learn the quadratic formula _and_ the periodic table of elements if he taught me.

He's gazing outwards at the orange sky, his eyelids drooping every now and then. We're both tired and sleepy. Our brains need a rest.

_Come on, Avery, ask me out for the Winter Dance already. Ranma should have when he carried me home, but he didn't. I wonder when he's going to ask me out… but you! You're right there beside me. You can just whisper if you want…_

It's so quiet.

* * *

**Saturday, my room**

My heart is beating fast. Twice as fast. Oh Kami.

I don't really recall what happened in the limousine after I wrote in this diary. I figure I had fallen asleep before I got home. That's not really a matter for my heart to beat twice as fast for, I know. And it actually isn't the reason why I'm out of breath now, as that abnormality can be easily predicted considering the fact that I've been so negative the past few days, because negativity can lead to abnormality, which, if I defined it right now, would be finding something like falling asleep in someone's limousine worthy of a double-time heartbeat.

No, it's something like waking up under a thick white fur coat inside my room, with Ranma Saotome slowly leaning his face towards mine, his blue-grey eyes half-closed, and P-chan squirming from under all the fur and squealing angrily, attacking Ranma and finally waking me up.

"Ranma!" I gasped.

"A-Akane, I can ex–" He couldn't continue because P-chan was scratching his face, which was blushing with the shade of a ripe tomato. "Stop it, pig!" He struggled and succeeded in taking hold of P-chan, throwing him outside the door, and locking the knob.

Shocked. I was shocked. It was almost a miracle that I could still talk. "What were you doing?" I asked quietly.

He inhaled deeply, desperately, about to say something – but words never left his mouth. "I-I…" he stuttered. He breathed in again. "When you arrived, Avery was carrying you because he told me you fell asleep inside his car. He gave you to me and so I carried you… he went back to his car and got your school stuff with that fur coat, and I led the way here to your room. He dropped off your books and told me…" he paused, vacillating, and then went on: "He left. I laid you there on your bed, and since it's cold I covered you with the fur coat Avery handed to me."

"What were you doing?" I asked again, without any tone of anger in my voice. Truth is, I was too shocked to be angry, to scream _hentai_, to ponder whether what he did was bad or good. I don't even know if I would have been angry. "What were you doing sitting on my bed and letting me wake up with your face inches from mine?"

He blushed even redder.

"Y-you were… you were sleeping, and I…"

_Found you attractive, sleeping serenely under the all the fur? Found you irresistible, tempting? Am in love with you? Wanted to ask you to the Winter Dance, and thought that a kiss would be a good introduction and one of the most romantic ways to wake me up?_

He made weird sound, sort of like a cross between gulping, being choked, and a whimper.

I knew there was no way out. He HAD to say it. _He just had to_. Whichever of the reasons I had thought of, any one of those! My hope was as high as it could be, the type where it could only be concrete if it stood on top of Mount Everest (sorta like a millisecond before an orgasm, come to think of it. Oh, not that I've experienced it before, but I've read about orgasm in Cosmopolitan).

Until a BANG on my door startled the two of us. And for the first time, Ranma looked really, REALLY glad that P-chan had interfered. "P-chan's trying to bash the door off," he said, but rather sheepishly. "I'm going now… goodnight." Without taking a last look at me, he hurriedly opened my window and jumped, along with his pigtail, blue eyes, and blushing face.

I gaped after him with my mouth open as P-chan continued to bang on my door. It began to form a rhythm, actually – the banging and the angry squealing – that I started imagining myself as a tigress in the woods, chasing her prey (with bongo drums playing in the background). I was about a yard away when…

An angelic voice began singing. A fairy appeared and saved my prey from being eaten by me.

I stopped my reverie and continued to listen to the rhythm of P-chan's banging, my mouth still agape.

WHAT? What, pray tell, happened? What, pray tell, did I do to have deserved such a fate? What, pray tell, did he think he was doing? What, pray tell, is going on with my life?

I mean, okay, it's not that I'm totally against what Ranma just did. If I were the past Akane, the one whom Ranma never showed his sensitive side to, I would without thinking mallet him out of orbit and wake up the whole Nerima with my screaming of the H-word. But I'm _not_ the past Akane. I am the Akane who's finding the new Ranma weird, who's enjoying it at the same time, who's falling slowly for him. _And now that I've written it down, I can never take it back (I'm using my G-tec)._

I don't even care if he doesn't ask me to the dance. I just want to CLEAR THINGS OUT! I don't want to live in a convoluted web of lies and pretensions anymore. If only people could just read other people's minds, the world would be a better place. I know I've been hiding most of the truths about myself all these years, but I give up. _I totally give up._ The truth is going to reveal itself no matter how you try to conceal it, just like trying to hold water with your cupped hands. It will only trickle down.

It doesn't matter if it's in the manner of writing in your diary and having people trying to read it intrusively, or getting through a mob of overly inquisitive students and having to answer all their questions on the way.

Kasumi just poked her head inside my room and let my raging P-chan in. She just told me we're going to visit mother tomorrow, and closed the door as she went downstairs. P-chan's sitting defensively against my folded leg, staring fixedly at the open window as if Ranma might come back any moment. Which I doubt he would do, because he is so vague.

I wish Mom's alive. Then I could just tell her everything, and she'll tell me all the solutions.

* * *

**Saturday, near midnight**

I just realized how hungry I was, so I sneaked into the kitchen in the middle of the night. And I should have seen it coming.

When I opened the refrigerator, there was a box of white chocolates (with the Jacque Torres seal). No note – just the box. How thoughtful. Thoughtful, but too nice. _Too_ nice.

Oh _Kami_, I am now officially the always-look-at-the-dark-side-of-life girl. What's wrong with being nice anyway?

Maybe I'm just too sleepy. After years' worth of thinking done in a span of five hours, who wouldn't be? I mean, I just realized, and then concluded that

1.) I take back what I said about the world being a better place if everybody could read everybody's minds. Because if that would happen, Ranma would find out that I've been _comparing the feeling of anxiety and too much eagerness that I felt when he was in my room and was about to say something_ to _a millisecond away from orgasm_. _Kami_ forbid he finds out.

2.) I take back what I said about not caring if he doesn't ask me to the dance.

3.) Avery _does_ see me as a friend – only. The reason for all the chocolate and the kindness is on account of the fact that he is rich, and he was brought up by a good family. At least I think so. Come to think of it, I appreciate him more that way than if he was really courting me, as our schoolmates have been hypothesizing.

4.) I now know why the white fur overcoat felt so familiarly warm when I put it on. The same warmth radiated from Ranma when he carried me home yesterday. I remember him taking a deep breath, and then exhaling. His body was warm. Comfortably warm. The kind of warmth that I wished would engulf me forever, that would prevent me from being a little frozen snowdrop.

And if my definition of forever can be elucidated in the sentence "It took me forever to finally realize my feelings for him," which is approximately equal to sixteen years, then I take my definition of forever back.

Because I know that I want to feel his warmth and be with him for more than sixteen years.

* * *

**Author's Notes:** Weeeee, Akane's admitting it… finally! And ahah, I can see you've spotted my Harry Potter reference. Teehee, just did that for fun… maybe we could all pretend that Akane's read the series, giving her a valid reason to refer to it in her diary. And whoah, the _hits_ to _reviews_ ratio is very… disproportional! I guess I've got more shy readers than I thought… If you've read my fic, please don't be reticent in dropping even one-liners – each one of them is special and appreciated, anonymous or signed.

* * *

DarkLunar: Whether it was your friend or you who wrote the reviews, thanks a whole lot for all of them! As I said, all reviews are appreciated. Anyway, I engineered this story thinking that Akane's had her "different" side all this time, and that everybody only knew about it when I started writing about it. Haha! (",) So it's no surprise that you feel like it's still her talking (I am actually trying my best to write in the most Akane-ish way possible)... you're not crazy.

kenshinlover2002: Thank you. Hmmm... from what I know about Ranma, he's the type who makes up his mind quickly and sticks to it (especially when Akane is involved). He'll have it all planned, do anything to boost his ego, but he messes everything up in the end because of his inability to do things right when he's in front of Akane. You'll see if he does the same in asking Akane out to the dance. (",)

Snowfox: Yep, there's more to come. Glad you think it's awesome!

Lain: Oh, but the "happy and joyful" part seems too far away from this point…

mag: Thank you so, so much.

The-Shadow002: Thanks! I did the transition of Akane's feelings very scrupulously.

Story Weaver1: I know. (",)

allergi: I think so too. That's what I'll be aiming to write about. Glad you're enjoying it!

Jace3: Looks like everybody's noticed that Akane's a little less self-confident… don't worry, maybe that'll change soon.

Priestess Kohana: Of course, Ranma will. And did you really mean you wanted Avery to DIE? That's so cruel… most people think he's a hottie or something. Anyway, thanks!


	5. Pop Goes Everything

**Author's Notes:** I know I know, it's been a long, long, _long_ time since my last update. I've been busy with school, I'm sorry to say. And as punishment, the gods let thunder strike upon me in the form of this fic's first flame (I consider it one, at least… or maybe I'm just being too emotional and sensitive).

And hurrah! Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince is out! (",)

**Disclaimer:** Not mine, not yours, but hers. We all know that. It's like, everyone knows that the Great Wall is in China, the Pyramids are in Egypt, the Rice Terraces are in the Philippines, and the Hanging Gardens are in Babylon. And Saint Nicholas, who is the real version of Santa Claus, is from Turkey. Er… right?

* * *

**The Diary of Akane Tendo**

**Chapter Five: Pop Goes Everything**

**Sunday, December 5, the memorial park**

"To the well-organized mind, death is but the next great adventure." –Albus Dumbledore

I'm sure my mom's happy in her next great adventure. She is an epitome of beauty, wisdom, strength, and everything in between. Plus, her mind was well-organized.

Unlike mine.

But I don't want to talk about my lameness now. Because I am right here at my mother's grave, and I don't want to make her feel bad knowing that her daughter didn't quite turn out much like she wanted to. No, not that I turned out to be convict or a school dropout or whatever. Something else.

So everyone in the dojo woke up early, like six in the morning, went here to the memorial park, prayed for my mom, and hanged out in peace. It's now ten in the morning, and the sun is beaming, but the December air is chilly. Everybody's under the polymer canvas about 20 yards behind me, while I am sitting on the grass beside mom's grave, meditating and reflecting quietly about what has happened with my life and what I have done to and with it.

It's not just about the dance or Ranma. Or the whole psychology thing. Or how I've become stereotyped as the pretty prize slash girlfriend-if-you-kick-her-ass. Or the how I've wanted to die a couple of times now. Not just, you know, die out of humiliation, but die. As in leave this materialistic earth and let my soul drift somewhere else.

No, not really. It's my life in general.

Yet somehow, thinking about my depressing life right here beside my mom doesn't seem too… depressing. There's really something about sitting with a loved one I have lost. It's like the serenity tells me that I haven't really lost her completely. Before Kasumi became the mother figure in the family, it was Mom I always ran to whenever I wanted to cry when I was a kid. I laid all of my burdens down at her feet. Whenever I was sick, Mom was the best medicine.

And now, being beside her sort of makes me feel that I have nothing to be depressed about. Okay, I may not be able to go the dance (I still could without a date, but I'd rather not do that), and Ranma is so vague… but, you know. Some of the kids in Africa are more helpless.

Father and I spent a few minutes alone by mother's grave several moments earlier. I asked him what Mom did whenever she was troubled.

"You mother was seldom troubled, Akane," he replied, a small nostalgic smile stretching on his lips. "She got along with everyone and everything that _Kami-sama_ never wanted to trouble her with anything."

I saw that coming – my mother was indeed like that. But I tilted my head up, waiting for a reply from Dad after I had said "Well… in those _few_ times, what did she do?"

He sighed. "She… well, she carried on with whatever she was doing. When she solved her problems, she tried to do it herself. She didn't want to bother or involve anyone she loved. Your mom was really…"

"Doting?" I suggested.

"Y-yes… but Akane, I'm telling you, if you'd have known her a little longer, you won't find any word or words to describe her with."

I was silent. Dad infrequently used that poignant tone of his. He was usually just a long-haired, middle-aged man who loved laughing with his bald, eyeglass-wearing friend who turns into a panda when hit with cold water. The wind blew his long black hair behind him and he sighed again. If I'd have known better, he's been trying to blink his tears away or letting the air evaporate them. But I didn't want to point it out to the guy whose love for my mom is unmatched, so I gave him a hug and a peck on the cheek.

"We all miss her, Dad," I whispered. "But she's _always_ there."

"Yes, she still is, isn't she?" he said, looking fondly at me.

I chuckled. "Hey, if there's somebody here who's got the closest resemblance to Mother, physically, mentally, or emotionally, it's Kasumi. Not me."

"Oh, _Akane-chan_… if only you know," he murmured as he turned his back. I swear, I saw a trace of a smile from the corner of his lips. "You have more in common with your mother than you think."

And with that, he walked toward the polymer canvas where Kasumi and Nabiki were preparing rice cakes, and Grandpa Happosai, Uncle Genma, and Ranma were salivating impatiently. So here I am, sitting beside an epitaph, writing on my diary, wondering if what Dad said is really true.

Because if it is, then I don't really have anything to worry about. Mom was like, a goddess on earth. Sure, goddesses have problems sometimes, but really. They're GODDESSES.

My stomach is grumbling. And I'm starting to smell something like a mix of pancake batter and Ukyou's okonomiyaki. Hunger _does_ bring out the imagination inside of a person. All we've got are rice cakes and shrimp… I wonder if goddesses have delusions, too.

* * *

**Sunday, under the polymer canvas tent, still the memorial park**

"_Oh, Ranma, they're delicious because I fused Eastern cuisine with Western cuisine! I call them pancake-okonomiyaki. Or… paniyaki. Or… okonocakes. Or maybe just pancakes. Make that _special_ pancakes."_

And if isn't enough that everybody's salivating over rice cakes, shrimp, and those flat things, Ukyou might as well be salivating over Ranma. She's all "Ranma, taste this!" and "Ranma, taste that!" It grosses me out. She used to be a tomboy! A REAL one! _Why can't she just stay that way and marry that Tsubasa person and live happily ever after with a couple of cross-dressing kids?_

And then I'll have Ranma to myself, because he doesn't really care about Shampoo or Kodachi. He cares about me. And I have no reason to deny that I care about him, because why else would I be writing what I have just written down about him?

Akane 1: Oh, crud, I can't believe I just wrote that.

Akane 2: You are _so_ in denial.

Akane 1: Am _not_.

Akane 2: Then why else would you be saying, "I can't believe I just wrote that"? You want me to lay the details out for you? One, you've been pining for Ranma for, like, _ever_. Two, he might as well have said he loves you with that kiss he almost gave you last night. Three, you're _engaged to one another, for crying_ _out loud_.

Akane 1: Uhm, okay.

Akane 3: You two, put a sock in it! Make up your mind already, Akane!

Akane 2: Which Akane?

I am so off my rocker this time.

* * *

**Sunday, 2 pm**

It really _is_ a small world, after all.

Avery's here. With Niles, his butler. And white, yellow, and red roses. Not for me, but for his grandfather who was half British and Japanese and was buried here in Japan. After he died of lung cancer. Because of Avery's Japanese great grandfather's wish. Which was for his son to be buried beside him.

Small, small world.

I am just, you know. Stunned. Or something.

It's not that I want to have an Avery-free day, because the previous week had been fraught with Avery-filled moments. But, you know. Maybe he _is_ related to Prince William due to some twist in the branches of the family tree. Because, after all, the world is small. And if by some chance Avery's really related to Will, I won't be surprised. Chances are, I may be related to that priestess from the Feudal Era… the one who fell in love with a half dog demon. But that's another story.

The following story, however, is about what's going to happen this afternoon. But I gotta slam this furry pink notebook shut now.

* * *

**Sunday, porch across koi pond**

"We're visiting my mother," I answered him as we both sat down on the grass beside two epitaphs after watching Niles retreat to the limousine.

"So… it's something we have in common, after all," he remarked, a faint, longing smile on his face.

"She died when I was a little kid. Since then, Kasumi became the mother of the house," I paused, looking at Kasumi who was still under the polymer canvas several yards away from us. "She's done a very good job," I added.

Avery and I set our eyes upon his grandfather's and great grandfather's epitaphs. "My parents were buried in America. But when I was really young, I remember having so much fun when I visited Gramps here in Japan. I was a kid, too, when we lost him… and I don't really remember, but Dad said that I cried my tear ducts out for a week."

"I was a kid when it happened, but I was already depressed," I said. "She left so suddenly."

"It was more painful to watch someone I loved die slowly," he sighed, looking up at the sky, so the light reflected the green in his eyes again. "Gramps was the one who decided to stop all the chemotherapy treatments, because he knew that he was due in a few weeks. The cancer from his lungs had already spread throughout his body… I am, in truth, scared to think about how such little things could decide how much time a person has left on this planet."

And then I saw something in his emerald green eyes which he never peeled off the sky. It was sort of like an all-knowing, wise, but a paradoxically desperate and pleading look. Like he was offering a silent prayer to whoever was governing the above.

But hey. Maybe it's just my imagination. Maybe his face is really just worthy of appearing in magazines or soap operas where actors often need to emote.

"It makes me think," he continued, "that everybody should _live like the present day's their last day on earth_. You know, live life to the fullest."

Such insightful words… further explained by another set of insightful words coming from Avery Hanabishi's mouth sheltered by full, pink lips on his beautiful, pale face. And such adjectives are not just of my opinion, but are of the truth.

Oh, okay, maybe I have just a _little_ crush on him.

"What do you mean, Avery? Because in apocalypse movies, what happens is that everyone robs every store they could crash into, an exponential number of people lose their virginity, the place turns into Sin City…"

"No, I mean," he stopped and then gazed at me, catching me off guard with his eyes' verdant-ness, "you should love like there's no tomorrow. Show your loved ones how you're thankful for them, how you care for them, how you love them… People who live long are actually _very_ lucky, because they have all the time in the world to do all of those things. And the ones who are supposed to live long but don't want to, the ones who commit suicide… not to judge them, really, but… they're the worst."

I swallowed a blob of guilt down my throat. I shifted uncomfortably on my grassy spot, and my hand landed on his. Blushing, I quickly withdrew it. "Sorry," I croaked.

Then he blushed too. I don't just _think_, because I _saw_. He was right beside me. _Avery blushed_.

"A-Akane," his voice went out croaky as well when I turned my head and faced him, anticipating what he was about to say. Because, you know, I was already deep into his philosophy about life and death that I wanted to hear more about it. "I just want you to know…" He stopped, because his voice croaked again. And I am telling you, I have never heard Avery croak before. Not once. He was never nervous. Until that moment, which was when he leaned closely towards me that I could actually feel his body warmth.

I waited, wide-eyed in eagerness. He cleared his throat. Then his voice came out clearer, and thus, more than the casual Avery-sweet, deep, and wonderful. "I just want you to know that I am thankful that you came into my life, that I care about you, and that… well…"

_Well WHAT, Avery?_ I was thinking frantically that time. _Well WHAT?_ I mean, okay, if I patterned it out with what he said earlier, he would have said that he… he… damn. That's just me. I don't want to be wrongly assuming and all that crap (even though the truth might as well have been dancing naked in front of me). But maybe he was going to ask me to the dance, who knows?

So what he wanted to say after "well", I never got to discover.

Because Ukyou entered the scene, shouting my name and dragging behind her a dazed Ranma whose eyes were locked upon Avery and me. Who – yes, and why the heck was I acting like dry ice, because I just realized now that if I budged from that interpretable position, things would have been better between Ranma and me – were still physically close to one another, since we froze on the spot.

Oh, crud.

"Good afternoon, Akane," she greeted in a sophisticated tone. I bet it has to do with Avery being rich and all, because Ukyou wanted to make a good first impression. Why are people like that? So… pretentious. They could just be themselves. And Avery's not that kind of person to begin with, the kind who judges people according to the way they talk, how they act, what they wear…

Oooh, not bad. Akane, you can be a preacher now! Spread good words, and you will be rewarded by happiness forever. You will finally understand the meaning of life, why Avery's so nice, why Ranma could be such a two-faced idiot and a sweet guy, why Nabiki's so voracious with money, why Father and Uncle Genma are immature most of the time, why Kodachi is so damn persistent and stubborn, why Kuno's like her sister, why death comes to people.

"Er… Hi, Ukyou," I replied. I looked past her shoulder. "Hi, Ranma," I added softly. His eyes locked on mine for a silent moment, and apparently his was giving off a _what-was-happening-between-you-two_ look. His eyebrows might have formed a question mark, minus the demanding component.

He looked totally confused and unpromising (which was so un-Ranma-ish of him, because Ranma is never transparent about his feelings when there's more than one person around), and it totally broke my heart.

If I were the un-meditated Akane, I would have thought, _What's he acting like that for? We're not even an item. I mean, outside the fiancé thing which our parents just initiated anyway_. And then I would have given Ranma a look that says "Hmph, serves you right, _baka_." But I am not the un-meditated Akane, thanks to my dad and my mom and Avery. However, even though I didn't do the things the un-meditated Akane would do, Ranma didn't seem less confused and hurt.

Maybe because Avery and I were still our last position when he was about to say the last sentence of his statement. The position where he was so, so close, that he looked like he was about to kiss me.

Even before Ukyou had said, "You too seem to be enjoying you time," with a wide grin, I was already standing and tidying myself up. Avery stood up after me, and in doing so he heaved a sigh. Not an ordinary sigh, but a one that indicated something like, _Geez, Avery, you missed your chance_. AND NO, IT'S NOT LIKE I AM TOTALLY ASSUMING THAT HE REALLY LIKES ME! It's just that it sounded so much like it. I, after all, have been reading Dr. Phil lately, and have learned so much from him about decoding sighs and body language.

And the leaning over thing that Avery did? I know what it meant, on a hypothetical basis. I am, uh, scared.

"Oh, you know," I began with the most stable voice I could possibly produce. "We were just talking about our parents and grandparents."

"With your bodies so close to each other? I see…" And she had that wide grin on her face again.

I shook my head. I _had to_ explain this to Ranma. See, I know that I'm not his girlfriend or anything, but I feel that I really needed to explain this because I hated that look on him. He's broken my heart wearing a cynical look, and he's broken my heart wearing the opposite of it. Oh, Ranma.

So, wanting to change the topic, I introduced Avery to Ukyou.

"Your okonomiyaki are delicious," Avery remarked.

"But you still haven't tasted them," Ukyou noted.

"You could always tell if something's delicious by the smell of it."

Ukyou smiled proudly. "Why, thank you, _dah-ling_."

Her voice was dripping like honey fresh out from a beehive, so sugary-sweet and sticky…

It made the hairs on my neck stand on end.

"Ehem," came Nabiki's voice from behind Ranma and Ukyou. "Your chatting looks like fun." She looked at me meaningfully, with a hint of a smirk forming at the corner of her lips. "I see you've got a new friend, Akane."

How could I have forgotten? At the evening of Avery's first day of school, Nabiki mentioned something about wanting to "meet that rich new chap from Britain" who was, obviously, Avery. And heck, that memory never bothered me – until now. _Because I am so, so, so angry with my money face of a sister_! I mean, what the heck is she thinking, befriending a person just because of his money? It's unethical. _Just plain wrong!_

I introduced Avery to Nabiki and ended up being so crabby for the rest of the afternoon. Not just because of Nabiki, but because Ukyou kept sticking to Ranma like Velcro. I mean, I can understand why Ranma'd want to hang out with her – she makes really good okonomiyaki and pancakes, but that's when he's inside _Ucchan's_! And I know why Ranma would _not_ want to hang out with me when dinnertime approaches, because I can't even make nice rice cakes, much more pancakyakis or whatever.

But Ranma likes _me_, not Ukyou.

Right?

Nabiki invited Avery to meet the family, and Ukyou tagged along. She managed to forget about dragging Ranma with her, though, probably because of being trapped inside Avery's eyes – oh, why the heck can't I stop talking about them? – and luckily, Ranma stayed behind. Maybe he was waiting for me to explain, just as I had expected. It was the perfect opportunity to do that, and maybe something else, with regards to what happened yesterday night…

"Hey," I started.

"Hey," he replied rather… uhm, normally.

Okay, emotionlessly. Or coldly, if I really dissected his voice into wavelengths and all that.

And you know, I was all, _maybe he really, really likes me. Because the way he's acting, I think that that he's jealous about what Avery and I were supposedly about to do_. A wide, blazing smile swelled from inside of me, but it never quite got out because I suppressed it. Insert giggle here.

"So, uhm, Avery and I were talking about–"

"Yeah, we all know," he interrupted. And I could really notice the change of his tone since… since Friday when he said "_So… you okay now_?" as he carried me home like a princess. It sort of made me feel… hurt, because I'd rather have him shooting names at me than giving me the cold shoulder.

And, of course, like the bigmouth that I am, I went all, "_Baka_." I know he didn't do anything that time, and that word came out of nowhere, but I did it to, you know, pick a fight. Because I knew that he'd snap back at me with some more terrible name. Which was comforting compared to the way he was so quiet and weird.

But as quickly as it went, I stammered an apology. "I-I'm sorry."

Silence. And I was like, _Come on, jerk, speak up!_ But when he didn't… Oi.

"Nothing happened, okay? He was just… reaching out for a piece of grass beside me. And really, all we ever talked about was death."

His brows furrowed, but only momentarily. Then he shrugged, like it wasn't such a big matter. Which it was! I mean, if he really did love me and all… or if that's too much, maybe like-like would do…

"I'll go help Ukyou fix her cooking things." And then he left. Just like that.

Ranma Saotome had just preferred Ukyou and her pancakes over me, Akane Tendo.

I so totally blew it.

* * *

**Sunday, 8 pm**

Sayuri just called. Sleepover at her place tomorrow night with Yuka. I just hope that being with my friends tomorrow the whole night would make me sleep, because I am so sure I won't be able to sleep tonight. My stomach is aching so bad, like there are worms trying to eat their way out of there.

But I need to do my homework: make a haiku for Japanese, and make 10 examples of past perfect, present perfect, and future perfect tenses for English. I also need to study the quadratic equation, review about Castro, Marcos, history of some elements, and cramps.

**Haiku:**

_WINTER_

_Earth loses color_

_Life retreats from cold malice_

_All of hope is lost._

**English (incomplete):**

_Past perfect tense_

1. He had already given her the engagement ring before she broke his heart.

2. The mother bird hid sadly in her nest after the father bird had left the family.

3. She decided not to go to the school dance because nobody had asked her out.

_Present perfect tense_

1. The chef has flirted with the martial artist for almost a year, even though they really don't look good together.

2. He has gotten hold of her heart and plans not to return it by not communicating with her ever again.

3. The prince has done an implausible thing to someone not meant to be his princess.

4. She has decided that she _could_ be his princess…

But her other self won't stop screaming _NO!_ in her head.

_Future perfect tense_

1. The child will have kicked her playmate's (uhm, the perfect word would give me a low mark on this) bottom before the latter steals the former's pigtailed doll.

2. She will have apologized and explained everything that happened to her pigtailed doll before midnight.

* * *

**Monday, December 6, Math**

Like the falling of rain in the middle of summer, the dry bareness moistens; like sketching a graph in the middle of a graphing paper, the bare and bold horizontal and vertical lines are made intricate. Your smile is so bright and the dark becomes light. Give me one, and don't erase it from your lips so quickly! Because we can overcome any asymptote that stands in our way. And when you say this to me from afar, even with the greatest slope of y2-y1 over x2-x1 you could think of, even when you think it out loud or quietly, don't assume I can find them. Your words are just dancing in space, on a bare graphing paper without sketches. The further you go, the more it hurts the person who loves you. Me. And the more I chase them, the more my heart feels the cruel distance, like the greatest square root of y2-y1 squared plus x2-x1 squared.

I think I've found out the reason for this, but it got lost in my mind because I kept thinking of you. I cannot seem to remember the reason of this effect, the independent variable that affects the dependent variable, the x-intercept that affects everything, with x equal to -(b) plus/minus the square root of b squared minus 4(a)(c), all over 2(a).

I can't stand the fact that we are one over zero right now, which is undefined. It's like, I'm the one and you're the zero... because you're not there. I am afraid that the time would come when we are zero over one, where I am already gone because of waiting in vain and being brokenhearted and you came back as the denominator one, because zero over one would equal to zero. Which is, you know. Done. Finito. Better undefined than zero, right?

* * *

**Monday, Lunch**

"Your diary?" Avery asks, since I just opened my furry pink notebook.

I nod. And, going back to playing with his lunch, he leaves me alone to write and doesn't even try to steal a glance at what I'm writing.

Which is this:

Ranma never spoke a single word to me this morning when we walked to school. And I never spoke a word to him, either. I still cannot decide whether it was his fault or mine. His for being jealous over such a small thing, because Avery never said _anything_. Mine for… oh, I don't know! For not making my mind up? For being so numb and insensitive? For wanting to die again even after hearing what Avery said about it?

What's worse is that the moment Ranma and I entered the gates of the school, he went straight to _Ukyou_.

Leaving me alone and semi-unaided against Kuno and his cronies.

Isn't that just sad and depressing and heart breaking?

And since Ranma didn't seem to give a damn about me the whole morning, Gosunkugi was all, "_Akane-san_, are you b-busy tonight?"

"No. Er… I don't really know… maybe there's something in my schedule that I overlooked–"

"See, I'm planning to cook something special tonight, and it would be a sh-shame if there's no one to share it with…" (whispers something about a potion, thinks I cannot hear what he's muttering) And before I could even answer, all the guys came flocking to me, like I was the last green leaf on the field and all the locusts were all fighting for it. Not for the first time this month, _I was inside a mob_. Because there was nobody to fend those guys off away from me. I mean, I could have just done the fending by myself easily, but it felt really better if a knight in shining armor came and defended me.

Unfortunately, there was no night in shining armor. Ranma could have been my knight, because if he were there, the mobbing wouldn't even have happened since all the guys knew that Ranma wasn't someone to mess with. And ironically, it was when the matter was related/directed to me. Now, he doesn't seem to care.

And oh, haha. Luck quite had me there. If I were the evil, ironic, scheming Akane, I'd be rolling all over the room because of laughing so hard. I wouldn't even be able to breathe.

Because you know what? Of all the guys who approached me and asked me out for dinner, _nobody asked me out to the dance_. Nobody (sure, there was that guy from the chess varsity. And he wasn't really that bad because he wasn't ugly and he was smart and nice, that I had thought of saying yes to him right then and there. Until I found out a few milliseconds later that he had HALITOSIS).

BUT I AM _NOT_ THE EVIL, IRONIC, SCHEMING AKANE! THAT'S WHY I AM ROLLING IN MISERY INSTEAD OF LAUGHTER! I mean, it's the whole martial arts thing. I just know it. Because of that and my tough ways, guys think that I am just an attractive tomboy. Or, you know, some decent guys may think that it's not hot at all, because they see me as an unattractive muscle woman. Maybe some are just, you know, intimidated, that's why they're afraid to ask me out to the dance. _For once in my life, I am regretting that I took up martial arts and put on a tough façade_. Who's been playing the part of _Romeo_ in _Romeo and Juliet_ since she was a kid? Me.

And so I am here, sitting in front of Avery who's picking on his green peas, in the school cafeteria. We seem to have gotten used to all the stares. In fact, we're both thinking that the public has gotten used to us being together all the time, that the stares have decreased. But then, there are still the weird others who are obsessed with the two of us being together – heck, that's like, CREEPY! – and keep taking pictures of Avery and I together to put into the school paper and make it a headline that we are really an item, which is so not true as I have clarified to everybody last week. Why is everybody so stubbornly persistent?

"Are you okay?" Avery asks. "You look kind of pale."

"I'm fine," I answer, not taking my eyes off this diary. I don't want to stare into his verdant eyes and drown in a sea of comforting greenness again. Tempting, but no.

He inhales deeply, and then exhales loudly. "Look, I told myself last night not to discuss any more of yesterday with you, but I can't help it. I know why you're so down today – it's Ranma. He hasn't spoken a word to you since… well, since I saw you arriving here together. Not even when you passed by each other in the corridor during recess. And I know it's my fault. If I hadn't–"

"Look, it's fine," I say. "It's not your fault."

Silence. Which is good, because I need to catch up with the dialogue in order to write them here, since it is happening right now. If I could, I'll make use of a recorder and play it back at home for me to write the exchange of words between me and him, but you know. I don't really have a recorder.

"I'm sorry," he pipes out. "I just can't help but… never mind." He picks on his peas again.

This is so not turning out right. And the fact that Ranma and Ukyou are eating together on the table near mine and Avery's isn't helping.

"How do you make pancakes?" I ask. This seems to catch Avery off guard. He looks at me blankly, and then blinks.

"Oh! Pancakes…" he scrunches his face up, thinking hard, like pancakes are as hard as computing for the total nuclear energy given off by uranium undergoing nuclear bombardment. Which, may I say, makes him look like… a cute kid. "Eggs, flour… I don't really know. Niles knows how to make them, I can just call his mobile phone, if you want."

"No, that's not necessary," I mutter. "How about okonomiyaki?"

Avery's apologizing look tells me the answer.

Now, I am eyeing Ranma and Ukyou. I know that Ukyou knows I'm looking, but she doesn't catch my eye. She's feeding Ranma those flat okonocakes of hers, or whatever. And Ranma's swallowing them like an eating machine; he's clearly enjoying his time eating delicious free food. And it pains me so much, because I know that if I feed him with my cooking, he definitely wouldn't be enjoying it.

Is that it? Is that why Ranma doesn't want me to go to the dance with him? Because he prefers somebody who can cook over me, a destructive amateur?

But wasn't Ranma the one who said, "I'm always here for you" and "The world could really use nice _kawaii_ people like you"? Well, he'd been lying if he isn't there for me in the dance! That's so… hurtful. Maybe I am doomed to a life of being an old maid after I am unmarried by age of 30 or something. Because I am tomboyish and I cannot make okonomiyaki or pancakes.

* * *

**Monday, Science**

There's just nothing to be said. Now it's Avery who's not talking to me. Not because he's mad at me or anything, I'm so sure, but maybe because of the conversation we had a while ago… and/or the one we had yesterday. I am sick of all this drama, you know? To think that I have been through many things for sixteen years that it's enough for me to earn a best actress award is just so sad. It's always the darker side of things for me.

We just had a test in science and all the things that Avery and I studied at his place were there in the questions. I am pretty sure I aced it. Thanks to Mr. Hanabishi, my other science teacher.

Well, that's looking at the bright side, at least.

But I'm going to pop pretty soon if this isn't going to stop.

* * *

**Monday, Physical Education**

Still no conversation with Ranma, not even a "Hi." Being awkward with Avery. Still no date for dance.

Gotta go, the volleyball game's starting and I'm first to serve!

* * *

**Still Monday, Sayuri's house**

After school, Sayuri, Yuka and I went to the mall. You know, just to chill. And I was really thankful that we did, because shopping made me get my mind off some horrible things. Maybe Sayuri and Yuka sensed that I wasn't myself today and decided to cheer me up… so they treated me to ice cream. Nothing much on the stomach, because Sayuri said that she'll be serving a giant pizza and Bailey's for dinner.

The bad side of it was that they were shopping for dresses. You know, the ones they'll wear to the dance. I mean, it's not a problem for them, really, because they have dates – Sayuri's going with Hiroshi, and Yuka with Daisuke. But for me… Oi.

We headed inside _Loalde_ and found that these pretty little dresses were out because the designers knew that it was Winter Dance season. Unfortunate for me, but lucky for all the other girls who have dates, because the dresses were REALLY cute. Sayuri and Yuka went through the store like a storm, searching and trying on every possible dress. I, however, was just seated on the leather couch beside the boring slacks. There was just no point in choosing a dress that I am not going to wear.

My friends noticed this and sat on either side of me on the couch. Yuka was all, "Hey, girl. Do you have your dress at home for the dance already?"

"No."

"Then what are you doing sitting here on this boring couch when you've got dresses to fit?" Sayuri asked. "Come on, let's get going."

"No, it's okay," I insisted, smiling. "I'm not going."

Their jaws dropped. "_What do you mean you're not going_?" they raised in chorus.

"You're AKANE TENDO and you're not going? That's… that's _madness_…"

"Yeah, Akane, it's the dance of the year!"

I chuckled. "I know. But…" I paused, making them huddle closer to me. I whispered, "No guy's asked me to go with him yet."

"Well, whoever he is, maybe he's just waiting for the right time," Sayuri tried to explain as-a-matter-of-factly. "Avery seems like a great contender for it. Or Ranma. Or Kuno. Okay, leave him. But you know guys, they're the most uncanny creatures. Even more than dung beetles."

"I… I dunno. I just don't want to go anymore," I explained.

"Look, Akane," Yuka stated. "Just because you don't have a partner doesn't mean you can't go. You can't just base your decision on whether a member of the male species asks you out to the dance or not. _Kami-sama_ never said that women cannot function without men."

What did they want me to do, then? Go _alone_? I mean, it's clear that nobody's going to ask me out to the dance in a span of a few days before said dance. Avery's been with me the whole week last week, and he hasn't even asked me! Ranma supposedly has feelings for me, but I haven't heard a word from him about the dance when we were still talking to each other – how much more now, when he doesn't even want to talk to me because he wants Ukyou more? I know I'm whining, but this really is something to whine about (weep, sniff, weep, sniff)!

I sighed after what Yuka said. You know, like there was no hope left in me. Which really was what I felt.

Finally, Sayuri convinced me to stand up and browse through the dresses. She postulated that guys would be flocking to ask me to the dance soon, and "if not, the chances of which are a million to one, you can go with us. Sayuri and I are going to be your partners."

Yeah, along with Hiroshi and Daisuke. I'm like, the fifth wheel. And if the chances are a million to one, then hey. My luck's running out – maybe I'll strike the _one_ in that million.

But I love Sayuri and Yuka like my sisters, so I just got up and perused through the leather, cashmere, velveteen, fur, silk, and etcetera dresses. Some of them were really, really beautiful – if I were going to the dance, then I'd have bought them on impulse. There was this pink and black dress made of silk embroidered with shiny lilies and white roses. There was a mocha fur dress which really reminded me of the one Avery lent me, the one sitting on my bed back at home.

But there was that long, white gown… it looked like it was made out of fairy dust because it glimmered so much. There were black rhinestones embedded at the front from the chest and made its way down diagonally to the right hip. There were white spaces that formed some kind of intricate design inside the sea of rhinestones. It looked… _beautiful_. I couldn't help whispering, "You would be _perfect_, but I'm sorry. I'm not buying you. Farewell."

"First, it was the sudden screaming-into-the-night thing, and now you're talking to fibers that have been woven into cloths made into dresses designed for formal occasions?"

_Hey, that voice sounds so familiar_, I thought. _It's the voice that kept popping out in my head when I first wrote on my diary. It's the voice that always said, "Crap. Kill yourself and get it over with" when I was still on my semi-suicidal stage. It's the voice that creeps me out all the time whenever I think of it telling me to kill myself, because it belongs to…_

"Nabiki, what are you doing here?" I asked, turning around to face the voice that talked behind me.

"Shopping. Finding a suitable dress for me." Then her eyes narrowed. "Now, what are _you_ doing here? I thought you weren't coming to the dance."

"How'd you know?"

"I have my sources."

"I haven't told anyone except Sayuri and Yuka. A few seconds ago."

"I heard you while you were sleeping. You were grunting, 'Don't… have… date… sorry…'"

I meant to ask her if it was really true, because, you know, I don't really sleep talk. It scares me. _Who knows what else I might have said?_ And who knows who else other than Nabiki had been listening before I could stop myself and zip my mouth? I still had hope before I asked my sister, because she might have been joking. Just to make me feel a little more depressed. But I know my sister. When her expression is flat and so "I don't really care if you don't believe me, but I say what I wanna say, and what I say is always true", that would mean for me that all hope is lost.

"Was anybody else awake when you heard me?" I asked, trying to be calm and all this-is-a-professional-talk-thing-here, because it was _Nabiki_ I was talking to, after all. She's like a monster that can smell fear. You've got to be tough to emerge victorious. Or at least pretend to be.

"Kasumi was like sleeping beauty, Dad was in deep sleep, Uncle Genma was snoring like a crocodile, and Happy was hunting for his sweets. He's into g-strings now."

"And Ranma?" I swear, she purposely left him out.

"In the dojo, practicing some new technique."

Phew. At least it was just Nabiki who heard me.

What am I saying, Nabiki knowing it is just like the whole world knowing it! She's like the internet – informing people about everything and anything (but a very expensive internet connection at that).

"So you like that, huh?" she asked, checking out the glittery white dress. "Not bad, sis."

"Yeah, I know…" I sighed. "W-wait, so what are you doing here talking to me when you have a tight schedule with your credit card and the boutiques around town?"

"Well, _Loalde_ IS a boutique, isn't it?"

I exhaled exasperatedly. I really didn't know where it led. And then she led me to the leather couch, where she gave me a tense embrace that turned into a… a bear hug. Why the bear hug? Here's why:

"Look, I know you know how embarrassing this is for me, embracing someone in public. And I'm not going to be all 'But right now, it isn't embarrassing, because you're my sister'. It _is_ embarrassing, because I am not someone who gives out hugs like Santa Claus gives out gifts to toothless kids who think that he's the Tooth Fairy. It's just that you've been _weird_ for the past few days. And although you have been weird all your life – but that's in my point of view – you've turned suicidal-weird. And that's just… weird."

"Easy for you to say," I snorted. "You've been strong all your life. You get what you want, and you always have things go your way. I, however, am unfortunately not like that. I sway like a reed in the wind, or whatever."

"You've been strong all your life, dorkus. And I can't believe you're not going to this whole dance thing just because you don't have a date. It's not like there's a rule stating that you cannot go to the dance if you don't have partner. And in the first place, whoever told you that you're not coming without a date? Avery will ask you soon. Or Ranma. You know how he loves you."

I snorted. "_Loves_ me? I admit that I know he _likes_ me, but _love_ is a very strong word. Besides, he's going with Ukyou. I just know it. And Avery… well, things are vague."

"Ranma's not going with Ukyou. And Avery isn't mad at you, if that's what you think. He's worried about you, how you feel about him being too open yesterday. He really cares about you so much because he says that you're one of the most important people to him right now. Again, Ranma's not going with Ukyou, because he doesn't love her. He loves _you_."

"How do you know Ranma's not going with Ukyou? And how do you know that Avery feels that way?" I know that with Nabiki's wide connections and knowledge about things, information about these matters is not hard to get. But the question was _how_ she got the info. If I weren't her sister, I'd be really creeped out. More than the usual.

"About Ranma… I just know. There are things that I just plain know, no questions asked. And regarding Avery… I talked to him at dismissal time." Before I could even start saying that she only befriended him for his money, she went on the stop me. "Look, cut it. I didn't ask him for money before giving him help. As I see it, he just needs somebody to talk to about you. I'm not saying he's obsessed with you or anything, but his care for you is much too great to even measure with an emotional ruler."

That made me feel so much better. It made me feel… loved. You know, other than family-loved. But a few seconds later, it made me wonder what in the world was wrong with me. "Then why haven't they asked me to the dance?" I whined. "I'm not abnormal, am I?"

She laughed. "Don't ask me that, because I've known you since you were a baby. But in other people's eyes, I am sure you're not."

My lower lip trembled.

"Look, Ranma and Avery are just finding the right time to ask you. Maybe either one thinks that the other's asked you already. It's just some technical problem. After that's fixed and everybody's got the right information, you and your date are going to go glam in the winter dance in no time."

Then, I thought that she was right. I was going to the winter dance, after all!

But a voice popped into my head. At that time, it didn't sound like Nabiki's because that would be like she was trying to mind control me. Maybe it was because of all the stress and being fed up with all of it, that the suppressed Akane awakened inside of me. As I write about it now, my hatred for that voice increases. It came out of nowhere! Is this a sign that I am becoming crazy? Because I said to Nabiki what the voice said inside my mind:

"Why do you people want me to go _this_ badly to the dance? Is there something nobody wants to tell me, like you're all going to pour tomato sauce all over me when I get there or something?"

"You're being irrational."

"Am not. So what if I don't want to go to the dance? Don't force me to go. I make my own decisions."

"Even if it means missing the event of the year?"

"Y-yes."

And then she stood up. "I just wasted that hug and all that saliva for nothing. Bye for now, sis. See you tomorrow." She wasn't even disappointed or anything. Her expression still showed that she was the Ice Queen and that she was not abdicating her throne. Great. First, Ranma. Then Avery. And now, Nabiki's not talking to me, I am so sure.

So now I am here in Sayuri's bedroom, and Yuka's checking out our horoscopes in the internet. Sayuri is downstairs microwaving some popcorn for the three of us. Pop, pop, pop goes the popcorn. Pop, pop, pop goes my head – brains, voices and all.

* * *

**Author's Notes:** The journal entry that Akane did during Math is actually a translation of a few lines of the song "1/3 of My True Feelings" from _Rurouni Kenshin_. Plus, you know, the mathematical formulas and stuff. This one's my longest chapter yet for _TDoAT_, because I wanted to make it up to you guys for not updating for so long. The next one you won't have to wait long for.

* * *

April: Blue eyes? I thought they looked more brownish black than blue in the anime… because I based my fic from there. Maybe you're referring to the manga…? Whichever, it's the same Ranma. I'm glad you find it interesting. (",)

ChidoriKaname: Uhm, I don't really know, there's so much editing to do. But surely, it would be finished on or right after the Christmas break.

draconis-rose: More coming up.

H+H-romance-addict: I know. That's why they call it Fanfiction. You know, fiction made by fans? And by definition of _fiction_, I think everybody gets the point, even before I start explaining what _fan_ means. Still, thanks for reviewing.

Ikerana: Thanks so much. I try to put in a lot of those moments… just to give it that sweet, the-world-isn't-such-a-bad-place-at-all vibe. (",)

Jace3: Another Ranma-Akane fanatic? Poor Avery, the villagers are rounding up on him…

-Oleander-Tea-: Thank you! And no, you're not a bad person; just because you like someone who comes in between Ranma and Akane's love doesn't make you one. And hot? I made Avery that way. You know, to match Ranma's… hotness, or make him jealous or whatever.

hashiba42: Thanks. You will.

Ralph S.: I know, Ranma's always in for competition in whatever aspect's available. I hope this chapter answered your opinion… I don't think Avery and Akane should be _just friends_. I like making things complicated. It builds up the tension. Thanks for reviewing! That's 1800 shy readers minus one. (",)

Story Weaver1: Thanks! The Caveman element of the entry sort of just popped into my head. Glad you think it's funny. (",)

The-Shadow002: Fabulously, eh? Thank you! I've always pictured Akane to be unsure of her emotions all the time. Once or twice she may make up her mind when rage clouds her thoughts, but when she thinks about it, she ironically goes ballistic inside and gets confused. Ranma on the other hand could be sure about most of his feelings, but his lack of the ability to explain them articulately is a grave handicap.

Lain: I am afraid to say things aren't as easy as that… because if they were, they would have invented vocal computers, where the computers would just listen to you talk, and then they'd type in what you say and you don't have to use your fingers that are very vulnerable to spasms. But keep on reading the next chapters! You'll have your answer.

kenshinlover2002: Thank you. And if you've read this chapter, you'll infer that Avery _does_ like her.

Neverwinter: Whoah, take it easy! I _will_ update, don't worry! (",) I'm glad that you love it so much.

Mystick Spiral: Thanks! Maybe he will, maybe he won't… who knows?


	6. Astrology

**Disclaimer:** We all know that it can never be ours. What's hers is hers forever.

* * *

**The Diary of Akane Tendo**

**Chapter Six: Astrology**

**Tuesday, December 7, 12:30 am**

Great. Sayuri is fast asleep on her bed and so is Yuka on her sleeping bag. But I am here in Sayuri's bathroom, sitting on the toilet lid with my head aching like mad, because _Nabiki's voice won't leave me alone._

Maybe I've had too much of Bailey's and pizza… I read somewhere that nightmares can be induced by the stomach being too full. And in most cases, these happen to men. Sometimes they die, because apparently, nightmares are of the female gender and are attracted to males. When a guy's having a nightmare, his blood pressure shoots up and all that, until he reaches the peak of his nightmare and dies.

Luckily, it's my tummy that actually aches right now (and not my heart). And I'm not a boy, so haha. No death-inducing nightmares for me, just plain ones.

So here's a copy of the astrology thingy that Yuka researched over the internet a few hours ago:

**Akane Tendo – Aries, fire sign:** High adventure was made for people born under the sign of Aries. These impulsive and energetic rams live for the present, and combat every problem that comes their way with a forceful blow – so much so that they're willing to fight through every situation, no matter how pointless the battle is! You've got to love Arians for their enthusiastic, head-on approach to any situation, which makes them the excellent leaders that they are.

Aries reigns: the head

The pros: dynamic, independent, outgoing, pioneering

The cons: impatient, headstrong, pushy, aggressive

Love matches: Leo, Sagittarius, Aries

Love mismatches: Virgo, Scorpio

(Sayuri says: "No questions asked." I say: "I'm not impatient! I can totally wait for a long period of time!" Yuka laughs and Sayuri joins her.)

**Ranma Saotome – Leo, fire sign:** As lions are the kings of the jungle, Leos rule the zodiac with their impressive strength and nobility. Always dignified, these confident cats are never afraid to voice out their opinions, which can make them appear pretty arrogant and selfish to others. Always the life of the party, Leos love the spotlight, but won't try to grab people's attention if it'll make them look foolish. Proud and persistent, Leos will go to great lengths to protect the dignity they're famous for.

Leo reigns: the heart, back, spine

The pros: honorable, self-expressive, dramatic, generous

The cons: self-glorifying, insensitive, overbearing, dominating

Love matches: Aries, Sagittarius, Leo

Love mismatches: Pisces, Capricorn

(I say: "Nothing can describe Ranma more perfectly. Except that I don't think he's dramatic. He's shy about being too mushy and all that. And he may be confident, but he's not a cat. He's scared of them." Yuka says: "Generous? Ranma?")

**Avery Hanabishi – Aquarius, air sign:** Aquarians surf through life at a cool, calm, and collected pace. These level-headed water bearers operate on the mind-over-heart philosophy – always rationalizing first, and then acting on their feelings next. Despite their level-headedness, Aquarians are also unpredictable and a little schizophrenic – they can switch from unadulterated laughter one minute to serious sobriety the next. Aquarians genuinely want to make the world a better place, and do all they can to preserve their utopian, ivory tower ideals.

Aquarius reigns: the ankles, the circulatory system

The pros: innovative, friendly, tolerant, independent

The cons: uninvolved, emotionally detached, impractical, rebellious

Love matches: Gemini, Libra, Aquarius

Love mismatches: Cancer, Virgo

(Yuka says: "Avery doesn't really look rebellious." I say: "Of course he's not." Sayuri says: "And a little schizophrenic? The handsome face is just a façade, then… too bad he's in my list of prospective husbands in the future." I say: "He is _not_ emotionally detached nor a schiz. And there is _no_ façade, because what you see is what he really is.")

_Is your love written in the stars? Check out which element you fall under, and see if your love's got it made!_

**Fire with Fire (meaning me with Ranma):** THE GOOD: Fire always attracts fire. This is the epitome of sparks flying! THE BAD: Because Fire people love challenges so much, they have a tendency to get on each other's nerves. Exciting explosions can be dangerous!

**Air with Fire (meaning me with Avery):** THE GOOD: Without Air, there isn't any Fire! And without Fire, Air people don't get around to exploring their full potential. THE BAD: Screaming danger signs. While Fire people glow brightly when they're with Air people, the sheer energy can deplete and exhaust them.

You know what? I used to laugh at these astrology interpretations because they didn't seem to make sense… but now, it's totally different. It's like an all-knowing manuscript of people's personalities. Almost everything it says is true. And you know what's funny?

Ranma's my love match.

Avery isn't, but at least he's not exactly a love mismatch.

Last Saturday, I've been saying that Avery only sees me as a friend. But what happened in the memorial park totally changed that… and I'm scared that I'm going to have to hurt either Ranma's or Avery's feelings… or both of theirs, at that. Which is totally ironic, because haha, they still haven't asked me to the dance. I mean, I know I'm making a big deal out of the whole dance thing… but it _is_ a big deal! Nabiki's speech back there in _Loalde_ makes me feel sort of guilty already.

"What's wrong with me?" I asked Sayuri and Yuka after the computer has been shut down and the three of us sat in a circle on Sayuri's bed. I picked some pineapple bits from my pizza and left them on my plate.

"Oh, Akane," Yuka sighed, rolling her eyes. "You're ugly. Those duckie pajamas are, too."

I looked at her. I was used to being called ugly by Ranma, but hitting on my yellow duckie pajamas crossed the line.

"Yeah. You're fat and geeky and unpopular," Sayuri added.

Yuka gave me a flat look. "We're being ironic here, Akane."

"Then why isn't anybody asking me to the dance?" I asked quietly. I know that Nabiki had answered that, but now I want my girlfriends' answers.

The two smiled at each other eagerly. "We made a math thing today," Yuka declared, "called _The Akane Theorem_. It states that Akane Tendo is much too special for all the guys in Furinkan High. She is a goddess that not any man could just take hold of and possess. Male species simply cannot approach her and go, 'Hey there,' because it takes a man of her level, or above, for her to talk to him."

Uhm, that thing was really flattering, but it made me feel bad.

"First of all, that wasn't a math theorem, because it doesn't involve math," I started to rant. "Next, I don't want to be regarded as an intimidating girl to the guys. I mean, it's bad enough that Ranma calls me _tomboy_, and some boys see me as an unattractive muscle woman! With these facts at hand, I can attest that I am officially the most unfeminine, un-dateable member of the female species in Furinkan High. Thus, I can also deduce that the previously mentioned are the reasons why nobody's asked me to the Winter Dance yet."

Sayuri and Yuka ogled at me as if I were a caged gorilla with rabbis. A quarter true, because maybe my nostrils were flaring that time.

The former cleared her throat. "I don't know whether to call you a nerd, or a really good lawyer." She took a sip from her Bailey's bottle. "And you know what? You just answered your own question."

"What?" After the storm in my mind has ravaged all my organized files of thoughts, I didn't know what we were talking about anymore. I was _that_ impulsive into shooting words with my motor mouth just to explain to my friends what I thought about stuff, that after everything, my state of mind was unstable.

"Why isn't any guy asking you to the dance, Akane? Well, I think those months of calling you names have finally paid off for Mr. Saotome. His teasing, which I believe is only just for his fun, has finally become a reality to you. You have finally submerged yourself in the fact that you are an ugly tomboy, and even Ranma himself knows that it isn't true!"

"Yuka's right. One of the signs of schizophrenia is being withdrawn from reality, Akane."

I singled out a pepperoni and slowly chewed it in my mouth. The horrible thing was that it tasted strongly of Ukyou's pancakes. I know that came out of nowhere, but remember: I was in an unstable state of mind. If I were a lion, I could have seen Yuka and Sayuri as chops of meat.

"So, uh," Yuka mumbled. "Maybe Avery and Ranma – one of which – oh just admit it, stop arguing – is your perspective date, because let's face it, you aren't going with Kuno or any of the jocks in any varsity – have their own reasons for not asking. A little patience goes a long way, Akane… Aries _is_ impatient, but learn to extend the line just a little."

"The dance is in two days!" I complained. "Girls have secured dates _weeks_ before, Yuka. That's reason enough to panic."

"Hmph. I thought you weren't going."

Sayuri was doing the I-am-really-tired-of-this-so-stop-it drama on me. I admit it worked that time. I thought the world was ganging up against me. And I was all, _so this is what really happens when good sleepovers turn bad._

"I'm not," I countered. "I was just asking _Kami-sama_, anyone, for an answer to why everything's been wrong for the past couple of weeks. I'm not a bad soul, am I? Or ugly? What do I have to do to prove otherwise? I didn't do anything to deserve this. I'm having a life crisis, and I'm not even twenty! I–"

Before I could even finish, Sayuri and Yuka wrapped their arms around me.

"You don't have to prove anything, girl. You're more perfect that you think."

"Having a date to some dance isn't the measure of who you really are. You may or may not go, and it doesn't make you less of a person! Yes, you _are_ making a very big deal out of this… we're all _Days-of-Our-Lives-ey_ here. But really, Akane, the matter at hand is so not the drama. You have friends like me and Yuka. Your family. Let's throw Ranma in. And the closest to Prince William any guy could ever get, who is, no duh, Avery."

Then, I realized that it was like I was taken back a week ago to last Monday night, when Kasumi told me that many people love me and gave me this diary.

And it really did make me feel loved. It made me feel so, so much better.

"Thanks," I croaked. "Love you girls."

"So let's forget about this whole dance thing for tonight, okay? We have things to do. We have to finish this family size pizza. We have to survive a night of Truth or Dare. And we have to condition ourselves now, because tomorrow we'll be cramming for our Japanese assignment in the morning."

"Uhm, already made my haiku," I noted, remembering my haiku so full of negativity and sadness.

"Okay, then that goes out to me and Yuka, who are obviously not Akane Tendo and do not do their assignments early. So let the remaining hours of the night spell F-U-N, okay? Sleepovers are made for that, you know."

We all smiled.

I still so don't like the mysteries that surround this world, but some… well, let's say I've grown to love them. Like girls and their ability to make things all better when they are together. You know, with Kasumi at first, and then Yuka and Sayuri now. I just like the whole mystery thing about that subject.

So we played Truth or Dare while finishing off the rest of the pizza and popcorn. I kept choosing truth, so they took advantage of it and asked that if Avery were really in love with me, would I say yes to him… At first, I shook my head frantically.

"Oh, come on. The signs are everywhere, Akane"

"Well… sometimes," I began really softly and slowly because I was afraid that somebody was listening outside the window even though it was closed. "I feel like I'm falling for him." I could tell that the two were suppressing their squeals. I mean, hey, that's what girls do when a girl says that she's falling for a guy, or at least feels like it. "Oh, I don't know! It's just that he's so… nice and sweet and understanding and amazing and mysterious and beautiful… he cares for me so much, and no guy other than Dad could ever care for me as much."

"Are you aware that your eyes are all dreamy?"

"W-what?" I snapped out of my reverie of Avery and me chasing each other under a forest of cherry blossom trees.

"Look," Yuka said, holding my hand. "We're your girls. Tell us. Have you, by any chance, really fallen for Avery?"

Her voice was so serious and accusing that it was hard not to show an I'm-being-oppressed!-help-me face.

Sayuri giggled. "Because you two make a very pretty couple! _Kami_, Akane, the moment you and Avery became the talk of the school, your names never left the student population's mouth. If you two become an item, there will be no more World Wars or any Apocalypses!"

Yeah, but our names never leaving the student population's mouth also got me and Avery (and Ranma) into trouble. And it wasn't just the day that the word MOB dominated my life. So just to be safe, the best answer was probably _no_. But I didn't say that yet. NO. Because my mouth went all motor again and Ranma's face (from the point of view where he carried me home, and it made me utter a little sigh that was, I guess, unnoticeable) flashed in my mind again.

"I still have Ranma, though," my motor mouth went before I could put my hand over my mouth. The girls raised their eyebrows, the type where the form said that if I didn't continue talking, they won't let me join pizza night anymore. It was so not happening, so I gave in. "Because… uhm. Yeah. My sister told me that Ranma loves me."

"Loves." Yuka repeated. "_Loves_, or is _in love_ with?"

As I tried to recall Nabiki's exact words, I realized that Yuka had a point. My father _loves_ me, but Tatewaki Kuno is _in love _with me. Blech. "She said loves."

"All the same. Ranma totally has strong feelings for you. Nowadays, they are becoming more evident by the minute. Why, we won't be surprised if he starts tapping outside the window, and then we open it to find him playing a guitar and singing _Crazy For You_."

"Besides," added Sayuri to what Yuka just said, "he's your love match. Aries and Leo, together forever…" She said it with such sweetness and stickiness that I had to throw a pillow at her.

"Shut up," I giggled. "I mean, I'm not stupid. All those signs he's been giving to me for the past couple of days just made things more obvious. But then, all the names… plus the fact that we are not on speaking terms right now–"

"Whoah, wait. Why?"

Without thinking, I said the truth. "He and Ukyou found Avery and I cuddling in the memorial park. Oh, which is so not true! We were not cuddling! Ukyou just made it seem that way, the pancake-making witch. Now Ranma's sticking to her for some unknown, twisted reason I cannot dream about."

"Oh _Kami_, snaps for Miss Akane Tendo. You're going to die." Yuka was grinning when she said that, so I thought that she crazy. "I read somewhere that girls die the moment they reach perfection. And perfection, as that article defined it, is bagging a perfect guy's heart. You just captured _two_ perfect guys' hearts, Akane! You're going to die tomorrow. Or right after we play this game."

"Are you doing drugs?" I asked, laughing, finally knowing the reason for the grin.

"No, really!" insisted Yuka. "Ranma was jealous. And he's not talking to you because he's _too proud_ to admit that he's jealous or something. If not, he's not talking to you because he's scared that you'll just laugh at him. Remember that you are on top now, Akane… you have his heart in your hands – you can crush it or take care of it, and he cannot do anything about that. You have the power, girl!"

It was eye-opening and scary at the same time. "What if I do something to Ranma's heart and he can't recover anymore? I cannot just let that happen to… the love of my life?"

"He might as well be," remarked Sayuri. "No matter how you describe Avery as the perfect guy, Ranma always wins your heart. Even before you both knew you had feelings for each other. I mean, okay, Avery isn't a love mismatch of yours, but Ranma's a love MATCH. _Epitome of sparks flying_, remember? It makes all the difference."

"No, stupid, it doesn't have anything to do with astrology this time," Yuka interrupted. "Ranma and Akane are really, really, REALLY–"

"Okay, stop. I get it."

"So you're going to do something about it already?"

"Heck, no. Let fate take its course or something. Good things are bound to happen if I don't manipulate things. I care for Avery… and I care for Ranma, too. I care for both of them as I care for you and my family. Let's leave things at that for now, until something new happens."

Sayuri and Yuka have obviously gone to the point of no return, where they have just listened to my confession and there was no taking it back. Whatever I say, they have etched in their minds forever. And it made them so happy that they just nodded happily at what I said.

The next truth question was so good, that even though it was Yuka's turn to answer it, the three of us did. It went like this: "What do you think is the best way to die? Any death wishes?"

I know, right? This night is getting funnier and funnier with all those coincidences.

Yuka said she wants to die quickly, like somebody'd stab her with a knife or sword many, many times in a few seconds, that before she finds out someone's killing her, she's dead. On her funeral, she wants only a few close people to attend. And all of them have to wear white. Sayuri, on the other hand, wants a grand death, a la _Juliet_ in _Romeo and Juliet_. She wants to kiss the poison on her true love's lips and they'd die together, and the whole city would be talking about it. And she wants everyone to wear pink on her funeral.

I said I wanted to die quietly. Like one of these nights, Death would just simply knock at the door of my room. I wouldn't really fight him, but if I had a date to the Winter Dance, I'll beg that he come back after the dance. If he doesn't give in, I'll seduce him (this caused a few loud laughs from the three of us). I don't really want a grand funeral, but I want Father, Nabiki, and Kasumi to be there. And I don't know why my mouth uttered it, but I said, "Ranma has to be there, most of all. And Avery. Oh, and you two."

So after Truth or Dare, and watching an episode of _The Simple Life_, we slept at eleven. After an hour and a half of battling with my blanket, I figured I just couldn't sleep and went here. In the bathroom. With Nabiki's voice repeating the word "Schizophrenia!" in a singsong tone in my head.

Oh, I hope I survive tomorrow.

* * *

**Tuesday, Homeroom**

I totally missed my morning martial arts training today. You know, the thing where I am welcomed by the Furinkan High Hentai Horde the moment I enter the gates of this school. I mean, yeah, the welcoming thing still happened (Kuno still blabbed the same lines, and so did his whole Kendo team and the Soccer and Basketball – the list goes on – varsities). But I wasn't the one who fought them off.

After a breakfast of French toast at Sayuri's place, the girls and I walked to school. When we were already halfway, a black limousine passed us by. And… you can pretty much guess what happened next. It went back and stopped right beside us. Even before the rest of the window opened, I knew who it was. Who else had a black limo driving him to school? Who else had beautiful green eyes?

"Ohayou," he greeted, getting out of the limousine.

I smiled. "Ohayou, Avery." Sayuri and Yuka made no efforts in concealing their excitement and squeals. "You know Sayuri and Yuka."

"Hello, ladies," he piped up brightly. "It's a nice day today, isn't it? The weatherman on NHK said that today will be sunny."

"Perfect…" Sayuri and Yuka sighed languorously, taking in each of Avery's sweet-sounding semi-British-accented words.

Just then, the limo left. I was half-expecting Avery to run after it, screaming Niles the butler's name, but he didn't. It was just a product of my twisted imagination anyway. Before anybody could ask, Avery explained. "Yeah, when I saw you girls, I suddenly wanted to have a morning walk. I realize I don't get enough exercise nowadays."

Reason enough. The two girls smiled dreamily at him as the four of us walked to school. It was sort of boring to walk quietly, so I told Avery about _the welcoming_. "Every guy in school rallies inside the gate, awaiting my arrival. And then they say the same things everyday, which is so, you know, blah. That the day will come that some guy's gonna be able to beat me, and that day is today."

"Beat you?" Avery asked. "Why do they want to beat you to go on a date with you? They can just ask you out, can't they?"

"Uhm, about that. You know Tatewaki Kuno? He started everything. I didn't want to go out with him because he was so arrogant and weird, and his words which are so ancient and totally incomprehensible. But he kept persisting, and so one day I just had to kick his ass. Everyday, the same thing, even when he fought me, too. Then sooner or later, he announced to the whole male population that whoever could beat Akane Tendo would be able to go out on a date with her. So here, I am forced to beat the testosterone out of a couple hundred guys every morning."

Avery laughed. I didn't see what was funny, but when his laugh cut down to an amused smile, I saw the hilarity of it all. "You are officially the most beautiful, wanted girl in Nerima," he said.

I was basking in his sweet compliment when we turned right and stopped. We were at the gates of Furinkan, and the challenged faces of yes, a few hundred guys in basketball jerseys, sumo wrestling underwear thingies, martial arts gis, etcetera. So there goes Tatewaki Kuno and his speech. And then their attention turned to Avery.

"What is this arrogant Hanabishi doing, accompanying thee, Akane Tendo? He deserves nothing less than a beating from us. That is, after our forces beat _you_ first," Kuno proclaimed, pleased with himself. "And one of us will be thy knight, as thou will be the princess of the Winter Dance."

Those guys were fighting to beat me to become my date to the dance. Really, really tempting (I promise!), but ew. That's just improper and weird, which is so _Kuno_. "I'd rather go without a date, then," I grumbled, fearing inside that it would really happen. "Now who's up first?" I stepped forward and went into fighting stance as the _hentais_ were preparing to advance.

"No, wait," Avery's voice spoke from behind me. I looked back, and he looked so… let's just say un-Avery-ish. He usually looked passive and gently blissful, but I saw a very familiar, daring look in his emerald eyes shining with determination, albeit he was still smiling. "I don't think it's right for you to fight all these men. It's not that I'm underestimating you, Akane, but really. Fighting you physically would be the most un-gentlemanly thing a guy could ever do." He stepped ahead of me and winked.

He winked, looked cute and heroic, and earned brownie points from me. But I was really, really worried, because Avery wasn't Ranma-macho (and it was then that I remembered why Avery's determined and confident face looked familiar – Ranma always wore that expression on his face), and I was so sure that the sumo wrestlers alone were going to crush his bones. Avery _so_ didn't look like the athletic type.

But the mysteries of this world never cease to amaze me.

Who knew that Avery was a Taekwondo expert? WHO KNEW?

He didn't even use his hands in fighting Kuno and his Kendo cronies! He had his hands in his pockets and let his legs and feet do the fighting. He kicked back all the balls that the basketball players threw at him; he evaded the boxing club's punches and did a couple of Heron Sweeps under their feet to outbalance them; he jumped really, really high and step-pushed the sumo wrestlers, and they were so big and blundering that they fell like dominoes, one after another… and so on until the school's front lot looked like a battlefield with only one warrior left standing.

"I'm really sorry," he apologized sincerely to the groaning bodies. Then he turned around to me, Yuka, and Sayuri. "And I'm sorry, too. I know that was pretty violent, and maybe I just ruined the sunny day the weatherman promised–"

"My hero!" the two girls chorused. I don't really know what spell Avery casts to girls in this school – even Sayuri and Yuka who are so not the fresh-fleshed, giggly type of girls… well, become fresh-fleshed, giggly type of girls when Avery's there. I think I'm the only one immune to this (on second thought, my knees turn into jelly whenever he gazes at me).

"You know Taekwondo?" I asked while Yuka and Sayuri were drooling over their newfound knight. Taekwondo was a martial art that strongly emphasized the use of the legs and feet as weapons of defense, and what Avery did was SO Taekwondo.

"Got strong ankles," he answered nobly.

I chuckled and went ahead, hopping over the moaning boys scattered on the lot. Strong ankles and subversive? "Aquarians _can_ be rebellious, after all."

"You said something?"

"Nothing, nothing," I waved it off. Just then, the bell rang. "Come on, we'll be late for class!" I had to literally drag my two girl friends because their minds seemed to float around cloud nine.

So that concludes my early morning. Now I need to stop this, because in ten minutes the math teacher's going to be here. And I need to sleep within those ten minutes because I slept at 2 in the morning.

* * *

**Tuesday, Recess**

RANMA'S JEALOUS!

Ranma was late because nobody woke him up (I always did, but I wasn't at home), so he arrived about three seconds before the math teacher did. And he didn't get caught because he didn't pass the corridors – he went through the window. He was panting when he took a seat behind me. And he looked… irritated.

He didn't even care that the math teacher was already starting his lecture. He tapped me on the left shoulder, so I turned my head left (I believe he did that on purpose, because he didn't want Avery, who was seated to my right, to know what he was telling me about). I gave him a questioning look. I mean, hello, he was the cold one. He wasn't supposed to be talking to me.

"Who fought off the Hentai Horde?" he asked.

"Why would you be asking that? They always get their butts kicked every morning."

"Yeah, by me and you. But those marks on Kuno's face don't look like your doing."

"Does it matter?"

"It does!"

"Why are you so irritated?"

"_I_ was supposed to fight them for you."

His pupils widened and his cheeks turned pink. Seriously.

"I can fight them myself, thank you," I said snootily. My heart was drumming against my chest that time. Having been through that sort of situation, I thought I knew what was going to happen next. I wasn't really sure, but whatever. Ranma could be so predictable sometimes. But it didn't stop me form being surprised when he said it. Ranma does that to me a lot, the thing when I know what he's going to do, but never fails to astonish me.

"But it wasn't _you_ who fought them," he continued his argument. "Who did?" His whisper was turning louder and louder that I was afraid he was going to burst any second.

"Avery did, okay?" I answered finally.

I faced the front and found that the teacher had already written two formulas on the board. I was about to take them down on my notebook when Ranma tapped me again.

"_What?_" This time, _I_ was the one irritated.

"Why did you let him do it? Was he good, anyway?"

"I don't know. And yes. None of your business."

"It IS my business, _baka_."

And I was all, _Oh, here we go again. After all those prince-and-princess-ey scenes, we're back to square one? Life really isn't worth living when things get rewound all the time, like some movie I'm sick of._

"Look, for all you know, I wasn't really in the mood to fight this morning, and Avery happens to know Taekwondo–"

"Oh, he knows Taekwondo now, does he? Well–"

"–so he fought them off for me because he is totally knight in shining amour material, and you have no reason to ask why he did it because you don't have a contract about beating the Hentai Horde up every morning anyway–"

"I'M JEALOUS, OKAY?"

"Tendo and Saotome! Buckets, now!"

So I wound up outside the classroom (with the whole class' eyes – and Avery's bewildered ones – following Ranma and me as we went out), carrying two bucketfuls of water, standing quietly by the corridor with Ranma beside me. I was angry and flustered and… tingly? We spent several minutes of staring out of the windows across the hallway. I myself counted 34 birds that flew by before one of us said something.

"Jealous," I snorted. But seriously though, I was really trying to hide the tingly, anxious feeling I was going through, which was sort of like badly wanting to pee, if I compared it to what a kid would be feeling. "Why would _you_ be _jealous_?"

Ranma was pouting like a ten-year old. "I-I…" His frown was becoming more and more evident, and to me, so was his uneasiness. "I'm the strongest person here," he mumbled. It appeared to me that even _he_ thought that it was a lame excuse. Well, you know Ranma.

"You're jealous… because you're the strongest?"

"_I_ always fought them off for you."

"So?"

"He violated my rights."

I chuckled satirically. "And how, pray tell? It was never _your_ right to fight the Hentai Horde off. Nor mine, for that matter. They just happen to need quantity and quality control, so I give them what they deserve."

"But still!"

"_But still what?_" I faced him and looked at him squarely in the eyes. And it was then that I became conscious of the fact that he had really handsome blue eyes. Like the sky between dusk and night, with a hint of ebony and violet. Really dark and flaming with hidden ire.

"You're going with him to the dance."

"So?"

"You're–"

"Uh, wait… I'm not going to the dance. Look–"

"–going with him, and that makes me jealous!"

"Jealous that I'm going with him? Haha, look, I'm NOT going!"

"_Baka_! You can't ju–"

He stared at me.

"You're not going to the dance?"

"No. And I didn't ask for Avery to beat the crap out of Kuno, either. So you go and have fun in the Winter Dance with Ukyou and her fusion of Japanese and American culture – those flat, evil pancakes. Because I can't make good pancakes to fight their evilness. I can't even make bad pancakes. I make the _worst_. Yes, I've accepted that fact already, so quit taunting me about it! And quit taunting me about being with Avery, because being my fiancé doesn't give you the right to do so and I have the power to choose with whom I want to talk with."

"But Avery–"

"Look, I don't really have enough energy for this. I slept really late last night, and if you don't want to end up carrying me home again at dismissal time, just go straight to your point."

At that moment when he didn't reply, I knew that he too was sensing that the talk he were having had no point at all. It started at the fact that he was jealous. If the talk ever continued, it would end there as well, like a loop in a computer system that would display "Welcome!" no matter what key you pressed. So, several moments later, the bell rang for English and the math teacher who was heading out of the classroom gave us permission to get inside the classroom already.

As we put down our buckets, Ranma whispered, "Just forget about what I said," before skidding into the classroom. And just before I was about to punch his head in front of me, a split-second flash of something sparked inside my head. Something like… missing, nostalgia, _something_. My fist hasn't touched that pigtailed head for such a long time already. Maybe I already forgot how to shout. It lasted for a _split second_, and it passed as quickly as it came, leaving me no time to think about it as I entered the classroom.

When I sat down and the class was waiting for the English teacher to arrive, Avery leaned over to me. "What happened?"

I heaved a sigh. "Fiancé matters. You know Ranma."

"Well, he seems to be a pretty nice guy. Matters about… love, I'm guessing?"

"Love?" It slowly registered in my mind. Loading… loading… loading… processed partially. "L-love? No, not LOVE. Something waaay too shallow, I'm embarrassed to let the world know about it." Yeah, something very, very shallow. But it was then when Avery said the L-word that I realized something: it _was_ about love. I… I don't know how I know, but I just do (now I know how Nabiki feels).

"Is it just me, or do you two don't spend enough time together? As fiancées, I mean. I know that you live in the same house, so you practically see each other everyday… but you rarely have quality time together. It's something you need to share with the person you're going to spend the rest of your life with, you know."

I stared at him. At his bright emerald eyes. And then I realized that they were much too bright…

"Rest… of m-my life with?" I mumbled incoherently, for some weird reason.

So that made me look like an idiot, and thank _Kami-sama_ that the English teacher arrived and saved my idiotic soul. Ranma didn't tap me on the shoulder anymore. And that is, I think, because he just told me that he was jealous of Avery, and that may be something embarrassing for a guy to say. Right? And that would mean that… his feelings for me are becoming evident now. Right?

But why didn't he ask me to the dance when he had like, the whole math period with me, alone together in the corridor? HUH?

No, no, enough about the dance. I'm not going, remember?

Let's just stop at HE'S JEALOUS and think about the whole thing, label prongs in the fork-like roads and stuff. Thinking about things other than _he's jealous_ gives me a headache. I know that's _so_ being in denial, but I don't want to go back to my suicidal self just because I don't want to have migraines anymore.

On the other hand… getting rid of migraines forever _is _very tempting.

* * *

**Tuesday, World History**

Spain's historic cities and fine beaches make it one of the most visited countries in Europe. Tourism is vital to the economy because, for its size, Spain has few natural resources. Behind its rocky Atlantic and sandy Mediterranean coastlines, most of the interior is a hot, dusty plateau broken by mountains. Good farmland is scarce and there is little rain, except in the north. During the 1500's, soldier-explorers called _conquistadores_ created a huge empire in North and South America. Spain was one of the richest and most powerful countries in the world, until wars with other countries and economic problems brought a slow decline that lasted until the twentieth century.

Hola. Esto es para mi: Akane, deberías ir a que te viera un medico.

Mi: Para mí no, gracias.

Por favor. Er…

Mi: QUE? Algo mas?

Uhm, nada.

See? Even _I_ intimidate myself. It's crazy. _I'm _crazy.

* * *

**Tuesday, 8 pm, my room**

Ever had the feeling that things are just happening too fast, that even writing everything in a diary won't make your brain keep up? Ever had the feeling that you think you're falling for someone, only to realize that you never really hit rock-bottom and stopped mid-way through the air, because of some implausible incident? Ever had the feeling that you think you're abnormal, because instead of being happy, you feel… different?

I have.

And this is going to take every ounce of my guts to recall and write.

Avery and I ate lunch together in the cafeteria with Sayuri and Yuka. Since the girls and I forgot to pack our lunches, Avery shared his food with us – honeyed toast, grapefruit, and black forest cake. The girls ate quite a number of servings of each because the food was undeniably tasty, but I only ate a slice of honeyed toast. I wasn't really in the mood, and the fact that Ukyou was spoon-feeding Ranma with her okonomiyaki, and that Ranma didn't seem to protest, didn't help.

After lunch, Sayuri and Yuka went to the ladies' room, leaving me and Avery in the cafeteria, surrounded by a 1-meter radius of silence, which was engulfed in a 10-meter radius of noise from the Furinkan High students relaying the latest gossip to one another.

"Let's go somewhere," he said, an inviting smile drawn across his lips.

"Where?"

"I… Somewhere. Just come with me." He took my hand and led me across the cafeteria to the door. Whenever Avery and I walked together, people would grow quiet and stare. That was exactly what we did, but the holding hands thing made them a bit… quieter. Like the silence was everybody's relayed gossip or something. And it made me very, very uncomfortable, because both our footsteps echoed inside the cafeteria. It was SO Twilight Zone, and I didn't even dare look back at Ranma. I just followed the direction where Avery, with his brownish blonde-haired and verdant-eyed glory, was headed.

He led me up a narrow flight of stairs to the school rooftop, where I once bumped into Kuno who asked me to the dance. When he opened the door, a cold gush of air swept around me. He closed the door behind us and leaned on the fence overlooking the school field. I followed him.

"This is Somewhere?" I asked lightly.

"Yeah, Somewhere. You seem awfully distressed nowadays…I really think you're frazzled. Fresh air always does everyone good."

"W-wait. Distressed?"

"Yeah. Like you're Superman and the world's fate is in your hands. It worries me, the fact that you're fretting about life too much. Because," he explained, putting his arm round my shoulders, "you should enjoy life. It's not a right, but rather a privilege. _Kami-sama_ can take it away from you anytime. How would you feel if you spent the last day of your life drowning in misery?"

Completely aware of Avery's arm around my shoulder, I tensed up. And he totally noticed. That's why when I started talking, he went behind me and put both his hands on my shoulders, went all Swedish on me, and started massaging. "If I spent the last day of my life drowning in misery?" I echoed. His thumbs kneaded my nape. "I'd feel… uhm, depressed, I guess…" His hands spread out to my outer shoulders. "I-I know that sounds lame, but…" They went down to the middle of my back, pushing hard. I had to hold on to the fence. "…_really_. That's it. Lame." And down to my lower back where something went _crunch_. Then he withdrew his hand and situated beside me.

It felt really, really good.

"See, that's why you need fresh air," Avery said, hearing my long exhale.

"Why?"

"It clears your mind and body from tension. With the help of a little massage."

We both laughed softly. "Thanks," I said as another cold gush of wind blew towards us. I thought that it was one of the greatest mysteries of life, how you feel much more comfortable with a person you've only known for a week than people you've known your whole life.

"Hey."

"Yeah?"

"Ever wonder what might happen if Kuno and his… uh, sister go royal family on each other and do the incest thingy?"

Where did that come from? This guy was nuts. "You know Kuno's sister?"

"No… I just heard about her from the daily cafeteria gossip. I had no choice but take all the noise in, rather than shutting my system down."

"Uh-huh. Right."

"So… ever wonder what might happen if they marry each other?"

"Ew." Disturbing mental images, disturbing mental images. "They're going to have kids…"

"…as crazy like the two of them!" Avery continued, laughing hard. And it was _really_ infectious. His laugh, I mean. I've never heard of him laugh like that before. "And you know kids from the royal family… because of genes and all that, they often end up…"

"…ABNORMAL!" I finished, laughing my butt off with him, until our eyes were almost in tears. It was a really nice feeling, laughing without a care in the world, without a care about my problems, without a care about _anything_. And I began thinking that the whole rooftop plan of Avery's was very effective. The veins in my body seemed to stretch happily, like an old man who's had osteoporosis for so long and was suddenly cured of it one day.

"Avery?" I piped up after our momentary mirth belted up.

"Hm?"

"You _do_ know that you're my solace, don't you?"

He faced the horizon so the wind wafted against his face, blowing back his hair and exposing his intensely green peepers. A smiled crept up to the left side of his mouth. "How?"

"Well… oh, I don't know. Whenever I'm with you, I feel very… light. Because you don't have problems and your life is perfect, and that sort of infects me into thinking that I don't really have problems and the world is a nice, safe, comforting place to live in. I can be myself when I'm with you; I don't have to toughen up to defend myself from anything. And I'm… I-I'm thankful for that. Very much." I, too, was gazing at the horizon, so I didn't know what his reaction was.

"You're welcome," he replied, an appreciative tone evident in his voice. "But Akane, the funny thing is… I don't really find my life _perfect_. It was boring just a week ago, so how much more if mind-numbing perfection is one of its adjectives? And… well, I thank you for coming into my life because your presence has brought me to think like I've never thought before – sort of like seeing the world according to your eyes. Most of the time it amazes me, sometimes it drives me nuts…"

"Avery!" I softly slapped his shoulder. He gently nudged me on the ribs as we both giggled.

"No, really," he continued. "You're like a dose of… er… drugs. I once thought that my mind would always be clear no matter what, but when I met you, I found clarity boring. Now I have to make decisions in my life that I don't know what the effect of choosing them would be. I learned to follow my heart."

What he said just totally confused me. I had _no idea_ what he was talking about.

"Here," he stated eagerly, handing me piece of folded paper. "It's pink stationery. I thought you might want it to come in pink, since your diary's of that color. Anyway, it's something that I want you to keep. You know, in case _Kami-sama_ takes one of us away. You never know when it's going to happen. A-and… don't read it now."

Okay. So I know that the guy is much too paranoid about death (I would have liked to say that he just values life very much, but really, he had necrophobia, which is the fear of death or something), but wasn't it just sweet? I tucked the stationery in my pocket. And looked at him. Then blinked. Because I realized that he was staring at me intently the whole time.

"Decisions, huh?" was all that came out of my mouth.

"Yes, decisions, and hard ones at that," he answered, not breaking the eye contact. His eyes were so hypnotizing that it was hard for me to blink or stray. "You be the judge, okay?"

"Uhm, okay," I agreed, recognizing my own heartbeat. And somewhere, I knew that another set of heartbeats was jiving with mine. Closely.

"I have a friend from Tokyo. His name is… Hanamichi. Ironically, even though everybody wanted to be friends with him, he had no _real_ friends. Until this girl named, uh, Sakura came into his life. They started hanging out, and he felt that she was the only one who could understand him. But one day, Hanamichi called me and said that a very big problem came up. He didn't know what was going on inside of him… he felt weird and tingly whenever Sakura was there. Soon he realized that he had already fallen in love with Sakura. And I told him to go for it, until he told me that Sakura already had a… a boyfriend. So I told him to _not_ go for it, but then he told me that Sakura and her boyfriend didn't seem to be getting along at all. They weren't talking to each other and that made Hanamichi more confused. He said that if he didn't do anything, his guts couldn't take it… and if he did something, _his guts couldn't take it_."

It hasn't been fully absorbed by my brain yet, so I kept silent, understanding the words he had just uttered.

"So," Avery went on. "What do you think Hanamichi should do? You know guys from Tokyo, they always seem to be in a rush. He told me to help him with what to do – quick. I know it's really–"

"Tell Hanamichi to go for it."

"What?"

"Tell your friend to go for it," I repeated. I based my answer from a Mexican American soap opera I used to watch when I was ten years old. "Sakura would probably break up with her boyfriend, the way things are going. She would need a shoulder to cry on, and that would be Hanamichi."

His eyes looked confused (the eye contact was not broken yet. That was like, three minutes and counting). "You DO understand what I just told you, right?"

"I do," I said truthfully, thinking about _Maria Constantina_ and _Jose Fernando_ in the soap opera Mi Amor. "Trust me, I've watched soap operas. That's what they do, and they end up together in the end. Happily ever after."

And that was it. It happened. He did it.

Avery Hanabishi kissed me.

* * *

**Author's Notes:** I did say that the next update would be sooner, didn't I? I didn't just do it for the reviewers, but all the shy readers as well. Remember, it really wouldn't hurt to drop a line… really. (",) So yeah, Avery showed his true feelings for Akane already, and we all know that this would create a big problem because Ranma has fallen for Akane as well.

And ah… forgive my lame Spanish somewhere in this chapter, I'm still learning it. ;)

Oolalah, the end of this story will be decided by you, the readers! I've actually received some emails and some of them actually want Ranma to end up heartbroken. I don't really know about that, since I myself am an Akane-Ranma fan… but whatever. You decide. Please review this story… because its fate lies in your hands. (",) I need as much feedback as I could get. When the votes are tallied (a la American Idol, haha), it would finally come. The end of this fic, I mean.

* * *

Story Weaver1: Thanks! Nabiki's also going to play a bigger role than the "pep talk that led to nothing." After all, she _is_ none other than Nabiki Tendo, who is sort of like Kim Possible who can do anything…

kenshinlover2002: If you've read this chapter, then you have the answers to why Ranma wasn't talking to Akane. Thanks a lot! (",)

Jace3: Thank you! Real competition, eh? It has just begun. Maybe Ranma _will_ learn to grow up and snap out of the Peter Pan business.

avery hawke: As I have been saying for some time now, I have many shy readers. Craziness? Nah, it's just a mere matter of bashfulness, or maybe broken keyboards. And yes, I am definitely continuing this, so _don't kill yourself!_ This is one fanfiction I am determined to finish. Not that I won't finish Changed Overnight, but as I said, I'm going to get this over with first before doing the next chapter of CO. Thanks for the praise!

The-Shadow002: Thank you so much. Here's a clue: for some reason, Akane's fate remains the same on the day of the dance. Nobody still asks her out, and the tiny guys are afraid to do so. Now, about Ranma and Avery… there's a big chance they aren't going to ask her out, either. So what happens? Read on. (",)

Ikerana: I'm glad you really like it, and yes, I _will_ update soon.

Criticizer: Akane, short-sighted? Nah, I think that for the past week in the story, her perception of the world has broadened a bit. The homeless people are one thing, but the name of the minor planet in the asteroid belt near the Earth is another. As for the time allotted in each entry… maybe 5-30 minutes will do, depending on the length. And that's hardly a long period of time. Just like Mia Thermopolis in _The Princess Diaries_, Akane's really good in writing, so the whole diary thing doesn't take too much of her time and effort.

La Chica For the Fruit: Thanks! I will.

BTB: Thank you very much. Maybe I'm writing from my teenage experiences or something. Oh, those were the times – disordered thinking, heartbeats easily affected by mere coincidental instances, etcetera. (",)


	7. Hustle and Bustle

**Author's Notes:** Here's for my friend Klarence, who died at the age of sixteen two months ago. RIP, man.

Oh yes, and this goes out to April, one of my anonymous reviewers: Ranma _does_ have blue eyes. I googled some images and saw that up close, his eyes are blue. I had to change all the descriptions of Ranma's eyes being brown throughout all the chapters. Thanks for pointing it out! ;)

**Disclaimer:** I'm sure everybody's well-informed: anybody who writes fanfiction cannot possibly own the category he's writing about. The word FAN just gives it all away, doesn't it? Shame.

* * *

**The Diary of Akane Tendo**

**Chapter Seven: Hustle and Bustle**

**Tuesday, 9 pm, my room**

I just couldn't go on writing, so I went downstairs to have a glass of water. I planned to come back to my room after ten minutes or so, but thankfully P-chan arrived on the doorstep after such a long time of being gone; he was covered in mud so I bathed him in cold water to reenergize him.

Yes, my little black piglet (who is now snoring on my pillow after having a huge fit and a power-cry – which is sort of like a power-nap, only one _cries_ in it – because of something he is gravely upset about) is heaven-sent.

Because, you know, the feeling after I wrote the last few sentences was too much, and if I didn't stop, I think I'd have palpitated. It felt very much like watching _The Ring_ at home and pausing the DVD player at the part where Sadako's nail-less fingers were halfway outside the television screen. Your heart starts beating a hundred times a second when you realize that watching a "creature" crawl out of a television _inside your own television_ is just wrongly creepy, or something.

Only I didn't find Avery's kiss creepy. I mean, heck, it was… er, breathtaking at first. How would you feel if the lips you've been staring at lately would meet yours in a surprising, unpredictable instance?

Uh-huh, yeah. I thought so.

But I don't know if it was me, or if it was _Kami-sama_, or if it was Nabiki tsk-tsk-ing inside my head, or the fear that somebody would see us like that. Something told me that it was wrong. Just plain wrong. I mean, okay, what was wrong with a guy and a girl kissing on the school rooftop? Nothing, right? Especially with someone like Avery, kissing a guy on the rooftop is _so not wrong_.

Yet I just found it wrong, for some reason. And no, it wasn't Avery. It was me.

A split second after we went into Frenching (FRENCHING! It felt like a tongue that isn't yours doing gentle acrobatics with your own), I pulled away. My mind was clouded – the causes of which are:

1.) the sudden kiss,

2.) the sweet taste of honey from his mouth due to our lunch of honeyed toast, and the cold mist that came from his mouth, and last but not the least,

3.) Avery himself who gave me the said kiss and had his arms loosely wrapped around me that I wasn't aware of until my knees buckled down and I didn't find myself on the floor because, yes, after a second his surprisingly strong arms pulled me up supported my weight.

And we just stood there for like, a minute without saying anything, without moving a voluntary muscle. I literally felt his heart knocking against my palm on his chest, and I was so sure that if his palm was on my chest as well (but it wasn't, okay?), he'd have felt the same pounding rhythm. The eye contact was broken, of course, and while the adrenaline rush dwindled, I fixed my eyes on a puff of cloud in the sky – it was moving really slowly that it might have condensed into liquid unnoticed by everybody if I, the one person who cared about it, didn't want to still see and reflect on my new world, at that moment when it was somehow Avery-ized.

(Who am I to care about a measly cloud when I don't even want to care about my social life anymore?)

But no, with _Avery-ized_, I'm not saying we continued kissing after the moment of swirls of feelings had run amok in the silence. Because the big clock on the school wall chimed, and it reverberated throughout the premises of Furinkan High School.

I tried to clear my throat, but I ended up choking for a second in, you don't say, my saliva. I strongly think.

"W-we'd better head back to the classroom. Mr. Sachi doesn't like repeating Avogadro's Law to latecomers," Avery croaked.

I nodded (I felt that if I spoke up, my croak would have been hoarser than his, or Cologne's for that matter).

No slaps, no drama, no "But I thought you only saw me as a friend? This isn't right…" or "No, the first time I laid my eyes on you, I knew I already fell in love with you, Akane. Please understand me."

NO, THERE WAS NONE OF THAT. Only the cold winter air that became one of main causes I was – and am – shivering, besides the thought of everything that happened. That, and my frizzy hair caused by the plunge in temperature.

So tomorrow night's the Winter Dance, and I am not going. I don't have a dress to begin with. And, duh, a date. Moreover, having a little experience in downloading horoscopes from the internet, I can safely predict that I'm going to be only "I" in an ocean of "We's" in school tomorrow morning.

And why not Avery? We kissed, right?

Haha, don't even go there. After he said "Take care," when Niles shut the door to his limousine, I concluded that the chances were and are nada. Because what he said before "Take care" was "latecomers," which happened a couple of hours past. No word about the dance, or anything else. Plus, he looked sort of… er, regretful? About the kiss, maybe?

The onion soup I had for dinner is beginning to climb up my stomach along with the hydrochloric acid. I think I'll sweat it out in the dojo.

* * *

**Tuesday, 10:30 pm**

30 counts of neck and hip twists, check.

50 counts of leg spreads and stretches, check.

100 sit ups and push ups, check.

1 Ranma teeming with male testosterone, check.

I was in the middle of doing a series of palm strikes on cat stance in my white tank top and lower gi when something red caught my eye, so I stopped.

"You might consider making known that you're in a room, you know. People might think that you're up to something."

He lifted an eyebrow, but he didn't look offended. "Well, ya might consider tying your hair up – it's… long now. The headband thing does a poor job in pushing your hair back."

"Why…?"

"You might not want anything to bother your training, is all," he explained before I could finish my question, placing his hands idly behind his head.

I ran my hands over my sweaty hair, and I did notice that it was almost past my shoulders already. I took my headband and tied it several times around my hair in a high pony tail. "Are you still jealous?" I asked, advancing to the topic which I guess wouldn't have come around until a half hour or so. I didn't feel like beating around the bush, anyway. Nope, no more beating around the bush for me, or for Ranma (if I really, really willed him to). But I didn't look at Ranma in the eyes. I stood up on my head instead, waiting for his answer as blood traveled to my head and my arms began to tense up.

"Maybe." His hands were crumpled behind him; he thought I didn't see them turn white.

"So you still are," I smirked. With a strong push against the floor, I did a somersault a couple of feet above the ground and landed on my two feet. "_Baka_." I know that I should have been flattered – Ranma Saotome never _ever_ admits that he's jealous, maybe unless it's a life or death situation. But even so, I know him too well that he may not even say he's envious when his body is halfway to the grave.

Did that mean that I was really, really, really important to him?

He's such an idiot. An unpredictable, inexplicably sweet and totally random idiot.

Ranma took a deep breath before revealing the thing I dreaded he'd known. There was no way – NO WAY – that he might have known the big mistake/accident I made earlier today! Unless, you know, the birds told him… maybe it wasn't just the parrots that could talk…

"No, but this time I have a really rational point! What were you doing with him when you both went out of the cafeteria? And why were you holding hands? You could have just gone out, but… _holding hands_?"

"Hey, it wasn't me who held his hand; he held _my_ hand!" I argued, facing him once and for all. Thus, I found myself trying to match the level of emotion he was showing, as he never put off his reproving stare that was, I admit, flaming with… jealousy and extreme anxiety and ostentatiously glowing with heavenly shades of blue and grey and mauve… WAIT, WHERE THE HECK DID THAT COME FROM?

Ugh, but NO, that wasn't the part I was talking about.

"But y-you _kissed_…" he countered, a verbal blow that hit me right in the solar plexus and would have knocked me out if it were his fist.

I didn't ask him how he found out; I was too gobsmacked to even think of what words to express "_How did you find out?_" with. And right then and there, I didn't care if I thought that he had bird-communicating powers (birds hanging out on the school rooftop, specifically), because now I realize that it's a sign of derangement. I don't really care.

Because the look in Ranma Saotome's eyes killed me. It pierced me not because he looked angry – he didn't look furious, no, not at all – but because he looked abased and totally hurt and dejected. What's worse is that my photographic memory took over at the wrong second, oh how I hate it, and Ranma's gloomy picture is permanently etched in my mind. That means it could kill me over and over and over and over again whenever _Kami-sama_, or my conscience, willed it to.

"I never meant for it to happen," I said weakly, hoping that it would somehow get over to Ranma's sense of reason. "And maybe Avery never did, either… sometimes people just act out of impulse, you know?"

He sighed painfully. "I-I know… but the impulses don't actually come out of nowhere, don't they?"

Shoot, I knew that. And so does Dr. Phil and the rest of the world. If I said no, I'd have lied. And so would I if I told him that I never felt the slightest tinge of emotion for Avery… which was why I never brought it up. I didn't want Ranma to ask me if I like-liked Avery or anything, because I was certain he knew most of the symptoms I show whenever I tell a lie: fingers fidgeting, eyes on the floor, stuttering, etcetera.

Oh, but he did. He asked me, "Do you actually have feelings for him?"

"It's time you take this maturely Ranma, you're being envious over nothing," I said as firmly as I could. "I… I don't have feelings for Avery."

Hope flickered in his once dim eyes, but the hope was dim as well – too dim, in fact, that I might have not seen them if I didn't have the heart to accomplish eye contact with him.

"What about the kiss?"

I myself cannot explain that – how it happened, and why – but I gave Ranma my opinion, which was my best (and only) shot. "I never willed it to happen, Ranma… as I said, it was just out of impulse–" _Avery's impulse_, I puzzled. "–that it occurred. And… to tell you the truth, there were no fireworks."

"Oh."

Before I saw the hope in Ranma's eyes grow a hundredfold into a big ignition, I was again in one of my private worlds where my present surroundings transformed into a blended blur, and I imagined Avery's kiss all over again: His lips were as soft as I presumed them to be… they were even sweet because of the honey… he didn't smash his mouth to mine, but his lips (and tongue) gently moved against my helpless ones instead. His hands never wandered anywhere except my back – they didn't go below the hip line. My palms were on his unpredictably warm chest, and I felt the warmth creep up inside of me. The kiss was almost perfect, really…

But there were no fireworks, and it made all the difference in world.

I snapped out of my reverie and looked at Ranma again. His appearance was so much different a minute ago, from what I remember before I entered my recollection of Avery's kiss. Now he looked like the Ranma a few days ago – the Ranma who was undeniably full of concern, bliss, confidence, everything.

He replaced his hands casually behind his head as he looked towards the ceiling. "I just wanted to know."

I blushed. "Well, now you do."

Silence (you know, for the past week, there has been a lot of silence going on in my life. Why don't I lend it for a while to the people insanely suffering the bustle and hustle of really big cities? That way, I would be a lot of help to the planet in general).

"So… about the dance… are y–"

"Are you going somewhere tonight? Maybe we could spar." My delayed speech interrupted Ranma. Really, though! My brain had already processed those nine words earlier; my nerves maybe weren't just keen to relay the message to my speech organs.

Ranma himself was surprised by my sudden output of words. "I… I'm doing something tonight, sorry."

"Oh. I hope it has something to do with Karl Gauss and Euler," I said, laughing discreetly.

"Er… actually… I was supposed to be with Ukyou fifteen minutes ago. Help her with stuff."

Hearing Ukyou's name, I felt my insides heat like pancake batter on a frying pan. "_Oh_," I said almost forcedly, praying that Ranma didn't interpret it the wrong way, which was how I really felt at that moment. "I'm going back to my room." I calmly walked past him to look for my slippers.

"I know that look." He exhaled jadedly. "Akane."

I whirled around to face him. "Ranma, you should have said that the moment you entered this room. You would have saved time, because I wouldn't have told you a lot of things. But don't worry, I'm leaving so you can go to Ukyou now. Because I am totally fine with you hanging out everyday and having a close liaison with a girl who COOKS PANCAKES FOR A LIVING!"

"I knew it! You're turning into medieval-Akane again!" As I slipped my slippers on, he blocked the door before I could open it, grabbed my arm, and pulled me towards the center of the dojo. I tugged my arm free, untied my ponytail, and adjusted my headband. "You are such a… such a _man_!"

We both stopped, surprised at the term he just called me, until I continued adjusting my headband by removing it once more, arranging my hair, and trying to put it on again.

"I come here, putting all my effort and sacrifice my time into talking to you about that Avery guy to finally clear things out – you actually tell me that the fireworks weren't there! And now you're hustling and bustling over the fact that I am _helping Ukyou with her work_?" He half-shouted his words.

"Because Avery is such a sweet, sensitive, smart and sensible guy, and Ukyou is a pretty girl who knows how to cook PANCAKES, that's why! And you don't have to bear with my _hustling and bustling_ because look! I'm leaving!" I stormed past Ranma.

As I was about to slam the door close behind, he called out angrily, "You'd better return my slippers, dammit!"

Looking down on my feet, I saw a pair of black slippers that weren't mine. I slammed the door anyway, and as I was walking away from the dojo in the cold air, I heard a distinct thud, as though someone had punched a wall.

Well, you can't blame me! Leaving the house in the middle of the night to "help Ukyou with her work" is enough to raise eyebrows here.

I don't want to go to school tomorrow anymore. I really don't. Sayuri and Yuka are going to be with Hiroshi and Daisuke. Being with Avery would be too silent and tense. And Ranma – heck, Ranma's going to be with Pancake Girl. It's just so sickly predictable.

* * *

**Wednesday, December 8, against the 2-ft side of a 4x2-ft table in the cafeteria**

Yes, as I am eating my lunch of Spanish _paella_, Sayuri and Hiroshi are at my right, and Yuka and Daisuke are at my left. And no, it's not like they're acting like I don't exist or anything. Now and then, my two good girlfriends and their dates check on me and make me join their jokes and stuff.

But really, I want to die. Because you know what?

Apart from the fact that even though my four friends at the table talk to me and deem me as existent, I still feel mortified because I am the only one without a pair in the whole cafeteria (even Gosunkugi has a partner: a really geeky-looking girl with protruding front teeth) – as I described it earlier, "the only _I_ in an ocean of _We's_"?

Apart from the fact that Ranma is, yet again, alone with Ukyou in one of the 2x2-ft tables – he hasn't talked to me since last night, and it seems like it doesn't bother him at all, being with Ukyou and not _me_ on the day of the dance, because most probably he's asked her to be his date already?

Apart from the fact that Avery didn't go to school today?

Apart from the fact that my lunch of _paella_ is making my palate itch?

MY SISTER NABIKI GOT KUNO AS HER DATE IN THE WINTER DANCE! It's just utterly disgusting… if Nabiki wasn't at the top of the food chain and the Ice Queen, Kuno the shark would be circling her and waiting for a chance to literally put his mouth on her flesh, that _hentai!_ And although being her partner would involve a catch, I am sure that Kuno is stupid enough to agree with it because he always does more harm than good to himself whenever he engages in deals with Nabiki.

I really want to die now. I don't care what Avery thinks about people who commit suicide. I don't care if it's suicide or homicide. I just want to die.

* * *

**Wednesday, 5:30 pm (half an hour before the Winter Dance starts), my room**

School ended early, about 2 in the afternoon, so that the students can prepare for the dance, which starts at 6 tonight. So basically, I've locked myself into this room with my dearest little P-chan for about 3 hours already, and it would have gone as peacefully as I thought it would, really. I had it all planned out, you know – I'll be in my room during the dance, and nobody would even notice that I never showed up. Since tomorrow's classes have been cancelled, I'll go to school on Friday and the people would have forgotten by then that I never arrived.

Perfect embarrassment evasion.

But my plan may never be carried out. You know why?

Rewind to Tuesday last week. Yes, the We-Think-Akane's-Going-Crazy-Horde did the whole knocking-on-my-door thing again. It was spearheaded by my father and aided by Uncle Genma. They went on about being worried about me and stuff, when all I could have been doing was sleeping! Too bad they knew about the Winter Dance.

_Not this again_, I mused.

Dr. Phil says that one of the best ways to relieve anger is shouting or screaming, and then the person would feel very much better. But no, I didn't scream. Not this time. Because last Tuesday, I realized that I am officially in a world where people are quick to judge whether a person is going mad or not. Seeing that I was judged as such just a week ago (and thankfully, the judgment eventually disappeared into thin air as I started acting normally), any close observer could easily predict that I am not – NOT – doing it again.

"_Akane-chan_, aren't you going to your dance at school?" Dad asked gently.

"No, Dad, I think I'll stay here. I'm fine."

We exchanged a few questions and answers, and, half-heartedly, he and Uncle Genma finally left to continue their game of shogi downstairs (Uncle Genma had most probably switched some figures while my father wasn't looking. Oh, those two…) and I thought I was safe for the rest of the afternoon. Kasumi's offering of help didn't matter, either, because even though I almost didn't resist her gentle tone, I surprisingly convinced her that I was okay and that I wasn't suppressing any feelings, that I just wanted to have me for myself for the rest of the day. So, no. It wasn't the We-Think-Akane's-Going-Crazy Horde.

It wasn't even Sayuri and Yuka, who came to fetch me and were shocked when I told them that I was serious when declared I wasn't coming. They stuck outside the door and convinced me to dress up, and Hiroshi and Daisuke even joined in (the driver of the limousine they hired was apparently growing impatient by the minute). After several fruitless minutes, the four of them gave up and left. Sayuri, however, slipped a note through the slit under my door, which totally touched me. It said:

_Remember _The Akane Theorem_. Remember what we talked about having a date to the dance not being a measure of who you are. Remember that Yuka and I love you. :)_

Okay, I cannot bear the furious tapping of glass anymore.

It's Nabiki, okay? Nabiki! _She's_ the reason why I feel that my solitary safety wouldn't last.

She's been tapping outside my window for three minutes now, telling me open it! I've been telling her that no, I am not opening it, but she refuses to budge… that silly sister of mine, she's going to catch a cold in the open December air! I'm afraid she's going to tell me something really harsh and all sorts of stuff… I don't want that to happen.

But she's going to catch a cold!

"Oh, P-chan," I just said to my little black piglet as I kissed him on the snout, "I wish you were human. Then _you_ could be my date to the dance."

* * *

**Wednesday, 6:50 pm, inside Kuno's limousine**

I feel like dying. No, before that, I'd want to _throw up first_, because I don't want to embalmers the cringe at the grossness of my viscera when I'm ready to be groomed to put inside a coffin.

So how did I end up, you ask, inside Tatewaki Kuno's limousine, on the left side of the back seat, with Nabiki at the center and Kuno at the right? I really don't know the reason myself. It seemed that the suppressed Akane in my brain stood up and took over when the me-Akane couldn't handle everything anymore. And now I am back to me-Akane, and I can't figure out how I had possibly agreed to come!

Here's an account of the previous events:

Having no choice (well, maybe I _did_ have a choice – I could have ignored her and let her freeze to death on my windowsill), I slid the window up, and Nabiki plunged onto the bed and wrapped my yellow blanket around herself. Her teeth were almost chattering. P-chan moved aside to give my sister space.

"Yeah. So. _What are you doing here?_" I asked, trying not to look demanding or anything. I watched her face closely, and it seemed like she was in the middle of a make-up application when some l entered her room. And somehow she ended up outside my window. She had her lipstick and eye shadow on, but only her left eyelashes were applied with mascara.

Having accomplished contact with the warmth of my room, Nabiki (paradoxically) went back to Ice Queen Mode and stood up, right in front of me, not breaking eye contact. "You're such a weakling, Akane, not going to the dance because of some petty reason," she said flatly.

Petty reason? She called _being dateless _a_ petty reason_? What was the average reason for her then, APOCALYPSE?

"Hey, I didn't do anything to you!" I said indignantly. "Leave me alone. I have important things to do."

"More important than the Winter Dance, which was what you've been carping about the whole week?" She snorted. "What you're doing is cowardice. It's best to face the music, if there's any music to begin with."

I was nonplussed. "What do you mean?" Sometimes, Nabiki could be more than Confucius himself could bargain.

"Oh, and here I am thinking _you're_ smart," she mumbled, walking past me to arrange her hair in front of my mirror. "Akane, I know you've been thinking that the world's giving you too many problems, and that you may have thought sometimes that the best way out is… you know, permanently _putting your life out_, whatever the term is. But really, sis, all you need to know is that you've been creating problems of your own! Going to the dance doesn't require a date, but everybody just seems to want to be in a pair because they're too nervous about the whole thing. Unconfident, get my drift?"

It processed slowly in my mind, and as Nabiki saw that, she went on:

"If you strut your stuff in the Winter Dance, people aren't going to laugh at you. They're going to admire your act of independence and confidence and everything in between, especially if you carry yourself well."

"Then what's with Kuno?" I popped all of a sudden. "Why is _he_ your date to the dance? You said that a person could look confident and independent without a date."

She looked amused. "He promised me a couple of membership and discount cards from Burberry, Chanel, and Gucci."

See? There was always a catch when you had a deal with Nabiki Tendo. But that would mean…

"What did he ask for return?"

Nabiki whirled around to face me, raised her eyebrows (threaded to perfection), and smiled. "My presence."

P-chan, who didn't make his existence known until that moment, let out a loud, "BWEE?"

_Her presence?_ No, that would only mean one thing. No effing way.

"_Kuno's in love with you?_" And what's worse was that… "You _permitted_ him to fall in love with you?"

I couldn't believe it! Nabiki and Kuno? Kuno hardly seemed Nabiki's type. And even when he started showing his feelings for Nabiki, she would have threatened him with something to not fall in love anymore. "How? WHY? H-how did–"

"Look, before you start forming disturbing mental images in your twisted head, let me get this one straight: you are right when you're assuming that I decided to agree to his request because of his money. It was _he_ who offered to be my date, and the membership and discount cards were the main reasons I said yes. I don't know if you've noticed, but we've been hanging out the whole week (wait, I don't think you may have noticed it until yesterday, because before that, we've been eating lunch out in expensive restaurants). And then something weird happened."

She stopped and sat on my bed. I sat down beside her and P-chan hopped on my lap, seemingly resolute to listen to Nabiki. "The weird thing was," she continued, looking rather puzzled and amused at the same time, "yesterday, as I was watching him talk animatedly in front of me while we ate at Mignon Restaurant, I realized how boring my life would be without him."

"And so you fell in love with him?" I offered.

"Hell, no!" she replied, her face wrinkling. Then her expression softened as she recalled what happened to her and Kuno yesterday afternoon. "As I was watching him eat his roasted chicken and explain about the origin of Kendo, he began to look… look _innocent_, like a kid."

"INNOCENT? _Kuno?_" I snorted. P-chan snorted with me.

"Yeah, innocent," Nabiki answered, ignoring my sarcasm. "Everybody knows that Tatewaki Kuno acts all grown-up – arrogant, most of the time – and all-knowing in public, but deep inside, he's just a kid. He's a kid at heart, at mind, maybe at soul… but his body sure doesn't fall under the list."

"Oh no, you didn't… you two _didn't_–" I was lost for words as I gaped at my sister who was smiling impishly.

"No, we didn't, and stop saying all sorts of unrelated things," she curtly said. "So, there. I realized that he's been a part of my life – business or not – ever since. And as he ate the rest of the roasted chicken leg, I continued observing him interestedly, how he did almost everything childishly… and then he noticed me staring and asked me why I was doing it."

"And then you told him you were in love with him?" I offered again.

My sister shot me a warning look. "No, I didn't. That never happened, okay? I just told him that he amused me a lot. He – ugh, Akane, stop grinning stupidly – asked me again why. Then… I guess, if I recalled right, maybe as I said the word _nothing_, it came with a genuine smile. From me to him. You know how rarely that happens, sis? A genuine, friendly, warm smile."

My eyes widened. "Oh, I know indeed, how rarely your warm smiles occur." For the past month, she has only given me about three of those – and I _live with her_.

"He smiled back. It looked stupid at first, knowing Kuno, but as he exhaled deeply, his smile eventually grew wider and looked… nice. _He_ looked nice. And at that exact moment, a really weird thought formed at the back of my mind: I didn't really care about what people would think when they see me with Kuno."

"So that means… you love him, right? And vice versa?" Their love story was so cute, Kuno didn't seem too disgusting now that my sister has exposed a good part of him.

"I don't know," Nabiki said tersely, snapping back into being the Ice Queen. "Now get your butt into the washroom and wash your face. I'll do your hair and makeup."

I just didn't get the point yet. "Wait. What does your story have to do with me?"

"_Baka_. I was trying to cram in that warped mind of yours that you shouldn't really care about what people think, because it wouldn't really matter. What matters is how you feel and what you want to do. In the future, _you_ will be the one satisfied, not the pretentious people faking themselves all the time."

"Oh."

"Now go wash your face."

I was about to get up from the bed, when I realized the bitter truth. It was as bitter as raw coffee and poison. "But Nabiki, _I don't have a dress_…"

She smirked. "Get up."

I didn't see the point, really, because even if I did, I couldn't go to the dance without a dress. But after a second, it was like heaven was shining upon the little _Loalde_ shopping bag that was dangling from Nabiki's fingers. I must have missed seeing her carrying it when she entered my window! And since I was speechless, Nabiki bothered to explain.

"I bought it, just in case. And since there are things that I just plain know, I was sure then that I was going to be correct."

I wanted to drown her inside a great big bear hug.

And that explains why I am here inside Kuno's limousine (Kuno doesn't really sound like the guy whom Nabiki was talking about a while ago, but I'm pretty sure it's because I'm here. It's weird, but whatever).

Nabiki helped me with my hair – with the aid of a curling iron, my shoulder-length hair now has gorgeous curls on the tips – and makeup. She painted my lips with a pale pink lipstick and finished with cherry-flavored, shimmering lip gloss. She used a curlash and mascara on my eyelashes, and light pink tint on my cheeks. After that, she went to her own room to finish her own preparation. I, on the other hand, opened the _Loalde_ shopping bag and took my dress out and wore it. As the straps rested on my shoulders, it really did look like it was made out of sparkling white fairy dust, and the rhinestone detail that stretched from the chest part to my right hip made it the most _wonderful_ thing I've set my eyes on. The neckline was between plunging and not-plunging, thank _Kami-sama_, and I decided to wear the pearl necklace my mom gave me when I was a kid. I fastened to my ears the pearl earrings my father gave me for my thirteenth birthday. One last touch… a few spritzes of _Clinique Happy_.

Everything was _okay_. In my opinion.

But _perfect_ was what my father described me when Nabiki (who sported a _little_ black dress) and I went downstairs a minute later (I thought I saw a blurred image of Ryouga in a tuxedo in the shadows on the hallway upstairs, but I figured that my nerves were playing with my imagination). Uncle Genma said that I looked like a white fairy, what with the white skin and white dress. Kasumi said that Nabiki and I were beautiful. They took several pictures with Nabiki and me, and when the honk from a car was heard from outside, we were off.

All seemed fine for the first minute I was inside Kuno's limo. He and Nabiki talked about a restaurant downtown, and I listened to them intently. It wasn't until we passed a chocolate shop, which reminded me of Avery, that my guts started to hustle and bustle. Ranma would be predictably hand-in-hand with Ukyou… but what would happen to me without Avery? He was absent from school this morning. If he's going to be at the dance, I could just hang out with him. But what if he's not there?

And Ranma. Could he really let the chance pass, his only chance of asking me to the dance? Why didn't he ask at all? I thought he had feelings for me… or so Nabiki says… Oh, _Kami_, I don't want to do this. Nabiki's pep talk seems to have disappeared from my mind.

"Here we are," Kuno says as the limo turns to enter the school gates. "Fashionably late."

I want to throw up. I want to die.

* * *

**Wednesday, inside the female comfort room, sitting on the lid of a toilet seat**

When we arrived, I didn't recognize the gym. It was just _striking_ how the white, indigo, and blue decorations made everything and everyone stand out. As we walked towards the gym (the huge speakers playing _More Than Words_), Kuno offered me his right arm (Nabiki was at his left) so that I would have an escort in my entrance, but I politely declined. The next thing I knew, about a few meters from the entry, I was in front of Nabiki and Kuno. The doors opened and I went in, trying my best to be oblivious of the stares I was getting.

_This is it_, I thought bitterly, feeling nauseated. _The people are going to laugh at me for not having a date._

"_She's so pretty,"_ I heard someone whisper from my right.

_Yes, people, _I thought to myself bitterly, _I know Nabiki's so pretty._

"_Who is she? Is her date late? Maybe I can abandon my partner and offer her my arm instead,"_ a guy to my left muttered to his friend.

And the whispers and mutters went on:

"_No way, I think that's… Akane Tendo!"_

"_She's so damn pretty, man! I wish I'd asked her… that Avery guy seemed too much for me, though."_

When I heard Avery's name, I quickly scanned the gym for brown hair and green eyes, but I didn't see him. Nabiki tapped me from behind and motioned to the direction where Sayuri and Yuka (wearing orange and yellow dresses respectively) were with Hiroshi and Daisuke; the four of them gaped open-mouthed at me.

"Hey guys," I greeted them nervously. I pushed Hiroshi's jaw up so his mouth would close. "You look like a fish, Hiroshi."

"Oh. S-sorry," he apologized as Daisuke laughed at him in silence.

"Akane, we thought you weren't coming!" Yuka exclaimed enthusiastically, grabbing my hand and almost jumping up and down.

"Well, Nabiki put up a good fight and won."

Sayuri grabbed my other hand. "And good thing she did; you look absolutely _lovely_! Your dress was all glittery when you walked in… you look like a fairy princess."

I giggled shyly. "Thanks." I swallowed nervously, but there wasn't anything to swallow – I realized that my mouth had gone dry. "Guys, give me a minute, I'll just go get myself some drinks."

I walked a few yards towards the food tables where there were chop suey, special noodles, steak, smoked fish, pasta, rice, and – hey, who knew – pancakes and okonomiyaki on huge platters. I proceeded to the refreshment table and drank some cherry punch.

Even though I knew I could always hang with Sayuri, Yuka, Hiroshi and Daisuke, and even though I was surrounded by many people staring at me, I couldn't help feeling… left out. Alone. Most of all, I was wondering – if there were so many guys who thought I looked pretty tonight (and everyday, for that matter), then why didn't they ask me to the dance earlier? I stole a few glances around me and saw that most of the guys weren't even from the Furinkan Hentai Horde. Or, you know, maybe they are, but they're just unrecognizable because they're dressed up.

And yes, I just realized how wrong Father was when he told me that I took after Mom, because haha. She was the prom queen of her time. I'm sad to say that I've disappointed her – it's not hereditary after all, because her date was a handsome guy who later on became one of the most famous male models of Japan years ago. Together, he and my mom became the prom queen and king in their high school days. I however, do not have a date to begin with. _Sorry, Mom._

"Ni hao," a very familiar, irritating, high-pitched voice piped up from behind me. I whirled around and saw Shampoo frowning. She was wearing a little red Chinese dress that bordered above her knees. Red chopsticks held her hair up.

"You be careful with hair, do not go whipping people faces with that."

"My apologies," I said calmly. Secretly, I was smiling inside. Shampoo is, of course, another one of the crazy girls who are after Ranma Saotome (who has so far not shown even an inch of his pigtail). "What brings you here?"

"Me cook ramen for people, cater service. Also look for Ranma, wo da airen… you see him anywhere?" Before I could even say, just to push it to her face, that Ranma was my date to the dance, she added, "He say he not go with you here in dance. Oh… and you not have date to dance, I see…"

My fist was a split-second away from scrunching itself up before I eased my muscles up and drank the last of my cherry punch. "Enjoy serving noodles the whole night, Shampoo," I bade contemptuously as I ambled towards the table where my four friends were. And let me tell you this: in my perspective, everything seemed foreign. I felt uncomfortable, and I didn't even know if it was because I didn't have a date anymore. I willed myself to keep walking and stop thinking, but it was no use – the feeling of discomfort swept over me, and my friends' table was a couple of yards away; I had to cross the dance floor and mingle with the dancing people for a few moments (which reminded me that nobody was asking me to dance. Nobody. I felt like a loser).

You know noodles, right? They start out as thin sheets of carbohydrate and a little sodium, and then sliced into thin strands. _That's_ how I felt. Like I was being sliced alive in mortification. But on the other hand, I realized that noodles do not end that way – before ending up in people's digestive tracts, they are seasoned with water, salt, spices, MSG, vegetables, meat, etcetera. Noodles aren't that bad, so I decided that I didn't feel like a noodle.

No, I felt flat.

Like a pancake.

I felt my stomach churning, and I knew that in a few seconds that the dance floor would be covered in my barf…

I hurled.

Nothing came out.

I hurriedly sat down on the fifth chair on the table. Sayuri and Yuka were happily chatting with Hiroshi and Daisuke when they saw me looking unwell. "Akane," Yuka began, "you don't seem okay…"

"No, I'm fine," I replied, smiling.

"I have paracetamol, if you want–" Daisuke offered, slipping his hand into the front pocket of his gray tuxedo.

I cut him short. "Excuse me," I mumbled as I grabbed my little black-sequined hand bag containing my fluffy pink diary and a pen, and dashed in my two-inch high Jimmy Choos toward the comfort room, which was thankfully just a few meters away from our table.

So I find myself here, sitting uncomfortably on the toilet lid inside the empty ladies' room. Why do I always find myself locked up whenever I am troubled? It's just weird. Maybe it's a sign that I'll die in prison when I grow up, or something.

They are now playing _Emotion_ on the speakers. Sometimes, it's nice to just listen to music, you know? You just want to listen to it the whole night and not do anything. Oh, here comes the chorus: _It's just emotion that's taken me over… caught up in sorrow, lost in my soul… but if you don't come back, come home to me darling… don't you know there's nobody left in this world to hold me tight… don't you know there's nobody left in this world to kiss goodnight…_

On the other hand, maybe not. It just reminds me of my misery.

Oh, Sayuri and Yuka just entered the room! They tell me they're worried. I tell them that my stomach is now feeling fine.

"But is your heart feeling fine?" Sayuri asks. A bold feat.

"I…" I don't know what to say. "Yes."

"Liar," Yuka snaps. She tells me that she saw me in the middle of the dance floor, looking ready to drop my barf bomb and cry at the same time. She says that crying is always a sign that lovesickness, especially when I start locking myself in the CR stalls.

I told both of them that I was such a dorky loser, because I'd done so many mistakes in the past and I kept repeating them. Because I was a macho chick, because even though almost every guy is attracted to me, they believe I'm too rough for my own good. Because Avery, who kissed me, didn't even ask me to the dance. Because Ranma didn't ask me either, and he's supposed to be _in love_ with me.

"_Avery kissed you?" _Sayuri asks, flabbergasted.

I tell her that yes, he did, and it didn't seem to help my dateless status either. The music outside fills the room: _And where are you now, now that I need you? Tears on my pillow, wherever you go… I'll cry me a river that leads to your ocean… You'll never see me fall apart… In the words of a broken heart, it's just emotion…_

"You're _not_ a dorky loser, Akane," Yuka says. "You're _Akane Tendo_, and everybody knows that Akane Tendo is far from the words DORKY LOSER."

"But you will be, though," Sayuri adds, getting over her state of shock. "You will only be a dorky loser if you lock yourself up in that germy stall. I mean, first it's your room. We can take that. But _a stall in the comfort room_? You've gone too far! Now if you don't get out of there, I'll bring down the door myself and carry your curvy ass–"

Yuka laughs, and so do I. "Okay, okay!" I said, smiling to myself and thanking _Kami-sama_ for giving me friends like the two girls outside my germy fortress. "I'm coming out."

Here goes.

* * *

**Thursday, December 9, little balcony outside my room**

Sometimes I wonder why people are born.

I mean, there's no point in living because we're all going to die anyway. Well, yeah, smart people go to school and end up living lifestyles of the rich and famous, but hey, one thing: just like homeless beggars with rotten teeth and normal people careworn to live, they're all going to DIE. Everyone ends up dead, and I'm not scared to say that. So what's the point of being born, eating, going to school, earning money, plastic surgeries and all that if we're all going to be decomposed into soil anyway?

I don't really know.

But honestly, nobody else does, either, and that makes me feel a whole lot better.

But not better, apparently, than what I felt last night, which was just pure joy and sweet shivers all over me! I am so happy, I'm sure the happiness would carry on until next year! I love my family… I love Nabiki for getting my butt into Kuno's limousine… I love Kuno for having his limousine… I love Sayuri and Yuka for being such wonderful friends and getting my curvy ass out of the germy stall inside the comfort room… I LOVE THE WORLD!

Here's what occurred in the best night of my life:

Sayuri and Yuka led me outside the CR, and we sat back down at our table. Out of the blue, Ukyou arrived on the dance floor, wearing a pink dress with ruffles on the shoulders and the hem. A pink rose pulled her hair up. And what bowled me over the most was that she wasn't with Ranma at all… she was with some unknown guy who looked oddly familiar.

"Expecting someone?" Nabiki's low voice muttered in my ear. I turned my head, and, as if she read my mind, told me, "I told you, Ranma's not going with Ukyou. There are things that I just plain know, remember? You've gotta trust me, sis, there are instances where I'm the most powerful figure you've got on the chess board."

"B-but," I stammered, "who's that guy Ukyou's with?"

"Oh. That's Tsubasa. The cross-dresser, remember?" And with that, she had gone away onto the dance floor where Kuno was waiting for her.

They were playing _Only Hope_. I sat, mouth agape, at the blonde guy that Ukyou was dancing with. Tsubasa was the guy – er… girl, whatever – who fell in love with Ukyou and followed her all the way to Nerima. He could dress up as a vending machine, a garbage can, or the Titanic ship if he wanted to. At first, everybody thought he was really a girl, but it turned out it was just a product of his cross-dressing powers. I secretly wanted him to finally hook up with Ukyou – the two belong together so much. And now, with his blonde hair cut short, Tsubasa's dream just came true.

"Hey, Akane, would you like to dance?"

My heart was totally thankful for Daisuke.

We went onto the dance floor. Daisuke held up my right hand, and I placed my left on his shoulder as he situated his right hand on my waist. We started to sway as Mandy Moore sang sweetly: _Sing to me the song of the stars… Of your galaxy dancing and laughing and laughing again… When it feels like my dream's so far… Sing to me of the plans that you have for me over again…_

"Sorry if…" he began, gulping, and not finishing his first sentence. "Yuka told me to dance with you."

"I know, I heard her whisper," I said, smiling at the dark-haired guy in front of me. His dark brown eyes that were once tense eased up. "Yuka's a great friend. You're lucky to have her."

"W-well, yeah," Daisuke replied, blushing. "Thanks. You look really pretty tonight, Akane."

"Thank you."

We swayed some more.

"You don't happen to know where Ranma is, do you?" I asked.

Daisuke looked surprised. "I thought he was coming with _you_. Hiroshi and I were wondering why you came without him."

My heartbeat tried to steady itself. "What did he tell you, then?"

He blushed again. "Actually, it's a pretty private thing that the three of us boys share," he paused, looking at my disillusioned reaction, "but telling you wouldn't hurt," he added quickly. "He told Hiroshi and I that… well, his world revolved around you now. He said that he wouldn't stick to _'If I can't get her, no one can' _because he wants you to be free; he always repeated that he'd rather die a hundred times seeing you happy with someone other than him than seeing you unhappy, whatever the reason is, even though he complains about it loudly and jealously to the whole world, and to you most of all. And…"

I looked at him, almost teary-eyed, and blinked my eyes dry. I asked Daisuke if I looked like I was crying, and he said no, so I asked him to go on.

"That was it, generally," Daisuke finished, worried that he made me cry. "He said a lot of things… mushy stuff that weren't like him… but what I told was the clincher."

"Thanks for your time, then," I said, smiling again as I caught sight of Nabiki, a meter away, dancing with Kuno whose hands began crawling down her spine. I never knew what Nabiki did about that. And I never found out if the figure I saw twice in the shadows during the dance was really Ryouga, either.

No, I never did.

Because when I was about to incline my head to take a closer look to the Ryouga look-alike, Ranma appeared – Ranma who wore a gorgeous black suit that looked really elegant on him, Ranma who still wore his hair in a pigtail. He was out of breath, looking like he just got there, when he tapped Daisuke's shoulder, and a momentarily startled Daisuke happily made way.

So Ranma and I just stood there, motionless (he was panting a little, though), right in the middle of the dance floor, with the nice scent of his musk filling the twelve inches of air in between us. I didn't know what the people around us did or looked like anymore; everything else seemed to disappear except Ranma and me. Since I was wearing heels, I was slightly taller than my usual self, but I wasn't taller than Ranma at all. He was still at least an inch taller than me. It wasn't an obstacle, though, for the both of us to not break our eye contact… his sapphire-gray eyes were as warm as a room with a huge window that let the warmth from the sun and light from the blue skies in, and they gave me so much comfort…

A few seconds later, as the chorus of _Only Hope_ played, he spoke up.

"I thought you weren't coming."

"I wasn't planning to," I replied, shaking my head slightly, deep inside wanting to disappear so badly. "Nabiki dragged me here. Sayuri and Yuka helped."

"Oh…"

_I give you my destiny… I'm giving you all of me… I want your symphony singing in all that I am… At the top of my lungs, I'm giving it back…_

"So you're here with Avery, I guess," Ranma said, shrugging, looking shortly at my pearl earrings. "I… I was just at the park half an hour ago. When I came home, Kasumi told me where you went, so I quickly–" He stopped, thinking twice about continuing. He didn't.

I was so nervous. "You should try some cherry punch," I suggested lamely.

"N-no thanks. Akane," he began all over again, drawing breath in. "Yesterday night. I'm sorry. I knew it was shallow."

I waited for a Black Hawk to destroy the ceiling and pick me up, or a Firebolt broom to bring me to Hogwarts. It never happened, so I looked down on the floor. "I'm sorry too. I don't have the right to forbid you from seeing Ukyou in the middle of the night, anyway."

"No, it's not that," Ranma said impatiently. "Do you even know why I've been hanging out with her?"

I looked up into his face and raised an eyebrow. For the first time, I thought of that. "Exchanging words as sweet as pancake batter and all that cra–"

"I was learning how to make okonomiyaki and pancakes, Akane!"

The truth hit me right in the forehead, like Nabiki's finger telling me to snap out of my silly daydreams. I guess my eyebrows formed the shape of two question marks, because he said, "I wanted to make them for the whole family on Christmas Eve. So you see, there was nothing going on! What you suspected had been wrong all along."

My eyebrows were the most expressive parts of my body at the moment. They furrowed slightly together right in the middle. "And that didn't stop you from being jealous of Avery, did it?"

He exhaled with annoyance. "I thought we already discussed this last night!"

_I lay my head back down… And I lift my hands and pray… To be only yours I pray…_

I gave him a look of apology, and the crease in his forehead disappeared.

For the first time, I was aware of the people around me – well, Nabiki, to be more specific. She gave me a wink, and after that everything around me magically disappeared again, except Ranma.

"Ranma," I started, and he looked at me intently, "why did you think I was REALLY serious about the whole suicide thing?"

"I-I… I guess I was just worried and it got the better of me… I was too scared of losing you. I… _I love you, Akane._" His eyes grew wide open after he said it, while my heart started beating triple time. Then he looked desperate, in search of something to get him out of the deep pit… "Because," he continued answering my question, his voice growing steadier, "with your unstable Akane-hormonal condition, you are very capable of bringing harm to yourself, _baka_! I mean… you could always kill yourself if you wanted to…"

The word. He said the word. I retorted angrily. "Oh, and after telling me that you love me, you're calling me a _ba_–"

And that was it. I was cut short. Before I could give him a piece of my mind, his right arm pulled me towards his warm, suit-clad body, and…

Our lips finally met. It took a lightning-quick moment for the 12 inches separating us to dissipate. He didn't even care to ask permission or do it in slow motion. After months of suffering, waiting – _finally_. And immediately, as I felt a jolt of electricity travel through my lips, as if on cue, _In The Still of The Night_ played on the speakers around the gym.

His lips were the softest and smoothest things I have ever encountered my whole life.

We didn't move for a few seconds, and then I pulled away. My heartbeat was beating delightfully as I felt Ranma's hands on the base of my spine and my upper back. I gazed at his smooth forehead, the fluttering of his lashes, his divine eyes, the bridge of his nose, his lips partly open.

I smiled. He smiled. And I didn't want us to just bask in each other's smiles the whole night, so I kissed him again – it was the only right thing to do – a soft, gentle one that nibbled lovingly on his lower lip. My hands traveled onto his shoulders, and I kissed him once more because I really felt like it. Because for some reason, it felt cinematic and beautiful, and I was totally loving it.

He returned my kiss with gentle, butterfly ones. The manly weight of his hand on my back startled me at first, but I realized that the guy was _Ranma_, who was on top of the list of people I trusted my life with. I felt a tingling sensation on the base of my spine as his fingers caressed it, seemingly tracing some words I couldn't make out.

It felt so good.

When he held the back of my head with one hand and deepened the kiss, I thought, _Oh, Kami, how silly of me… I've known Ranma for so long and I had never even kissed him, and I never knew just how much I wanted to kiss him, until now…_

There wasn't any thrusting involved, so it's you can say that he didn't thrust his tongue inside my mouth, like the romance-movie thrusting that always made me cringe with the aggressiveness and grossness of it all.

There wasn't any thrusting involved because his tongue came in _slowly_ in my mouth. And it tasted… it tasted like Ranma, whatever that means. It wasn't honey-sweet, but it had a sweetness of its own that gratified my taste more than Kasumi's cooking did. He came at me gently at first, and then, before we knew it, the kiss swelled to tsunami proportions. With open-mouthed ardor, Ranma lunged at me with long, hungry, passionate kisses. I didn't even hear the music anymore; I only heard the skipping, speeding heartbeat somewhere inside of me. Like bongo drums.

My knees quivered like Jell-o, but Ranma was ahead of me and had already supported my weight even before I fell. I put my arms around his neck, and it deepened the already deep kisses we shared. His tongue was doing the Moonlight Waltz with mine, and the sweet taste of cherry punch was there all along, together with the saccharine taste of Ranma. We breathed through our noses and continued kissing… I don't know how long it lasted because everything felt so _wonderful_ and neither one of us wanted to end it, because it was like both of us realized that we had wanted to kiss each other badly for such a long time now, and it was very delayed so we wanted to make up for lost time.

I've heard so many people describe love and kisses with certain phrases before, but I never understood them… until then. It was just so… brilliant… no, nothing could ever explain it justifiably. It was like a warp in time, where everything disappeared and appeared in slow and fast motion. The next thing I knew, Ranma was finishing with a kiss that lingered on my lower lip before we both pulled away.

"You taste like cherries," he whispered soothingly in my ear as we both swayed with the music, oblivious to the all the faces circling us. I buried my face in the corner of his neck and shoulder and smiled.

_In the still of the night… I held you, held you tight… Oh I love, I love you so… Promise I'll never let you go in the still of the night…_

And you know what?

Besides the fact that the kiss was perfect per se?

Besides Ukyou and Shampoo (as Sayuri and Yuka told me via voice message this morning) throwing me jealous looks as I stayed in Ranma's arms for the rest of the dance?

Besides the fact that a fleeting anger swept over me from his kissing, his damn good kissing – WHO TAUGHT HIM HOW TO KISS LIKE THAT? – so I asked him so and he said that I was his first kiss, and that maybe everything just happened harmoniously because Fate willed it to occur that way?

There were fireworks!

The dance ended at midnight, but Ranma and I were gone an hour before that. We had a joyride – he carried me as he hopped and ran on the roofs of Nerima. We both kept laughing the whole time… the curls on the tips my hair bounced up and down whenever Ranma jumped. The cold wind blowing on my face was a totally fantastic feeling, like being taken on a magic carpet ride.

Ranma landed on our lawn without a sound, and he put me down. I held his hand and led him towards the koi pond, where I sat down, pulled my dress up to my lap, and dipped my feet in (my Jimmy Choos were on the grass). He followed and sat right beside me, pulling his black shoes and socks off, not even caring to roll his black slacks up, yet slowly taking off his suit so that he was wearing only a white polo shirt.

We shared a minute of silence, moonlight, and stars, as the carp tickled our feet.

"So," he piped up awkwardly. "What do you want to do now?"

"I don't know."

He put his crisp black suit on my bare shoulders, and I held it close. He chuckled. "Tonight was… tonight was just so…"

"…full of…" I continued, my voice fading.

"…stuff," he finished lamely. I smiled.

I began thinking then that this was the hardest thing to do after what happened: following up.

"What do _you_ want to do?" I asked him, my sight following an orange carp circling my left foot.

"I don't know either," he replied, "but I'm not yet sleepy."

Trying to figure if he was using a suggestive tone, I said, "Me too."

"Then let's just–"

"Sure," I answered immediately, facing him and catching a glimpse of his beautifully growing smile before we started kissing again. There was splash from the little koi pond as I accidentally nudged a carp with my foot. Ranma pushed me gently down on the grass, his hands on either side of my head as he looked at me fondly.

He lowered his head… and he was about to kiss me when we heard a car pull up somewhere outside the gate. It was Nabiki, and she just arrived home. Kuno bade her a good night as the sound of the engine roared then grew fainter in the distance.

Ranma and I scurried behind a tree with a huge trunk as Kasumi welcomed Nabiki at the door, asking where I was, and if I was with Ranma.

I heard Ranma muffling a chuckle and slapped him – not too roughly – on the stomach with the back of my palm. "What are you, ten years old?" I whispered coarsely. I was pinned against the trunk. Ranma's front was completely touching mine because we kept ourselves as flat and unseen as we could.

"Sssh," Ranma whispered into my ear and held me in place. I couldn't really see him since he's taller than me, but the fragrant smell of his musk filled my nostrils and acted as a tonic. My breathing became heavier and quicker, and no, it wasn't suffocation at all.

Nabiki explained that we both left early from the dance and didn't know where we were, but she and Kasumi could just check around…

"If we get caught, tell them we were squirrel hunting," Ranma murmured. I giggled, and he mumbled, "Don't, Akane, we'll get caught…" before suppressing a laugh, his warm breath on my neck.

"Then don't mention squirrel hunting, it's so lame," I said between muffled giggles. Honestly! Squirrel hunting? What? That absurd pretext was the reason why my body shook against him – the more I tried to stop, the more I threatened to laugh out loud, until, without warning, Ranma kissed me to shut me up.

I am really, really sure that my cunning sister saw my Jimmy Choos and Ranma's suit by the koi pond, only she didn't tell Kasumi about it. "They're big kids. They can take care of themselves," she said a little loudly than normal as she and Kasumi went inside the house. And that just affirmed my postulation, but whatever. I was enjoying my time with Ranma… I've never felt so ecstatic before…

I kissed Ranma back. We heard the sound of the door being locked, then… nothing. Crickets.

He continued kissing me. Continued pinning me against the tree trunk.

Truth to tell, I wasn't sure I was really ready for the thing I had in mind that we were going to do… I didn't really know. I had no idea. I wasn't even sure I wanted to do it. This fact kept nagging at the back of my head, and it was getting stronger as each moment passed, each moment of kissing.

But really. Knowing Ranma, my knight in shining armor, I would have known that he wouldn't think of doing that until both of us were ready. Besides, he was as immature was a ten-year old, remember? Insert smiley here, and a LOL.

My hands were on his jaws, opening and closing with mine; his right hand caressed my left cheek, and his left was right above my head, his palm on the rough trunk. He stopped to look at me, and the delay was sooo painful, and it seemed that kissing was the only cure. _Months_ worth of kissing. I began to think how stupid I was, letting my pride get in the way of finally getting to know my heart, and even thinking about killing myself!

It was like we became kissing masters in a matter of hours (haha! Honestly! Just wait until Sayuri and Yuka find out about this)! At least it was something Ranma and I had in common. A few moments later behind the tree trunk, I pulled away. Ranma asked if there was something wrong, and I said no, until I failed to stifle a yawn.

Ranma laughed.

"Well, I'm sorry Mr. Saotome, because many people, unlike you, do not have infinite sources of energy dwelling in their bodies."

"Whoah, whoah. Don't worry," he chuckled. He backed off and I stepped forward. Then he carried me, ran, and jumped all the way here to the little balcony outside my room. I thought we would share some _Romeo and Juliet_ scenes, but he opened the unlocked door to my room and switched on the dim yellow lamp, before he laid me gently on my bed. He sat on the edge of the bed and gazed at me.

"I love you, Ranma," were the last hushed words I remember saying. I pulled him close by his collar and kissed him one last time. Whether Ranma returned it or not is sort of a blur now. All I remember was his angelic face calling out to me, then a soft sensation brushing against my forehead and words being uttered like a name, or a magic incantation, or a prayer.

The next thing I knew, after all the hustles and bustles of the day, I had fallen into a deep sleep. I dreamt about fireworks the whole night.

And then I woke up just an hour ago, still in my _Loalde_ gown and pearls, with Avery's unreturned fur overcoat on me. I found my Jimmy Choos in a corner of the room. Right after I took a bath and got into my white cropped shorts, blue _Kickers_ tank top and the white jacket Kasumi gave me last Christmas, I saw a yellow post-it stuck on my wall. It said:

"Are you tired? You've been running on my mind the whole night… pun intended. Hehe. Good morning!

Love always, _Ranma_"

It was the loveliest note I have _ever_ gotten. And here I am, writing about everything that happened to me last night – all the wonderful things I have missed all this time! I am so happy that I could just FLY…

Most of all, I love Ranma Saotome with all my being! I LOVE HIM!

Oh, Kasumi's knocking on the door. She says that someone wants to talk to me on the phone. Maybe it's Yuka or Sayuri… they're going to flip when I tell them all about it! No, wait, they already know. _Everyone in school saw what happened._ I'll be back in a jiffy.

* * *

**Author's Notes:** Now that was a long one, wasn't it? I hope you all liked it… I have actually come to a sensible decision in Akane's love life. I may have disappointed some people, but I made most of you happy anyway, right? And with all that kissing, I'm actually not having a hard time imagining your wiiiiiide smiles and high pitched squeeeeeeeals. ;)

So yeah, thanks to the people who have reviewed so far, the ones who sent in their "votes" because you guys are the best! Watch out for the next chapter, okay? It's coming soon.

Now who could tell me how many times I mentioned the words _hustle_ and _bustle_ in this chapter? (",)

* * *

L.B.-chan1: Although I originally wanted this fic to end up with Ranma and Akane getting together, I have to say I've been moved with the sentiments of the readers who want Avery for Akane. I had to make a big decision before I made this chapter, and as you can see, my decision didn't seem to agree with yours. More people wanted Akane with Ranma, and based on previous experiences, it's always like that in the Ranma-verse. Don't worry though, the part you feared didn't happen… turns out, Ranma and Akane are very much happy with being together and our girl never did herself in. (",) Thanks for the praise! And don't be bothered with the long review you gave, it's very much appreciated. See how I'm writing a long response:p

RYUSHI: Very much true, since this story's written in Akane's POV. Naturally, since I am not too much of a tragedy-loving author, everything will end up with my main character being generally satisfied.

Livvy: Well, as you can see, your unwavering support for Ranma has paid off! (",)

apie: Actually, I've written two sets of the seventh chapter – one with Akane ending up with Ranma, and the other with Akane ending up with Avery. I just waited until each has garnered enough votes, and the first one won, so it's the one I published. And yes, I was feeling a little lethargic to make THE decision, and I figured that you guys could help me, so I asked you to help me choose. As you can see, Akane ends up with Ranma, but your advice of making Akane take it easy on Avery is credible. Avery is too much of a nice guy to have his heart broken. (",) Oh yeah, I didn't put too much of drama and angst in this story because this one's meant to be light and romantic. If you want lots of lines full of anguish, though, you might want to read _Changed Overnight_. :p

Story Weaver1: I do, too. But yeah, I'm glad that you found it cute and funny. I realized that in her diary, a girl could write about (besides her fluctuating love life) – what else? – sleepovers. Another thing I figured was that if Avery was just good for his looks and gentleness and all, he wasn't going to match up to Ranma. Cute, gentle boys tend to be boring sometimes, which is just so sad. Especially for Akane, who cannot live with peace her whole life, because the usual violence is a part of her daily life – even with someone like Avery who could occasionally ground her to tranquility. So… voila! Taekwondo. You know, for the cool, hidden strength effect, without the hands. That would make Avery well-rounded and Ranma's worthy rival.

kenshinlover2002: Yeah, he did. I actually realized that if Avery wasn't making a move, then things wouldn't heat up the second time. If it happens once, it won't happen again. If it happens twice, it's going to repeat itself a couple more times. So yes, you're going to have to watch out for another one of those scenes.

RYUSHI: I'm not supposed to be biased or anything, but that's just… good and evil on the same stage. Let's just see. I think you had it wrong, though, because Akane didn't say "I do," or anything… she just didn't think twice about saying what she said, and she never thought that the mere act of relating her answer to Avery's "Hanamichi" problem to a soap opera was an analogy that she actually was okay about his feelings for her.

Forgot my other name: Yep, perfect. I made him that way, I think. Anyway, thanks!

Ikerana: Whoah, thanks! Ranma admitting he's jealous was actually a big step, and it sort of builds up the tension… along with, you know, the kiss. Your enthusiasm has been reimbursed, by the way, because Ranma and Akane end up together after all.

ranmakane: No, I didn't. (",)

The-Shadow002: Thank you so much for the praise! Your reviews have always thrilled me since _Changed Overnight_. And I've been loving cliff hangers since I started writing… although there have been some instances when I was very much frustrated by other authors doing the same. :p

Jace3: Amen to that.

avery hawke: Finally! Someone who shares the same fanaticism I have for both _Ranma 1/2_ and _The Princess Diaries_! (",) And hey, you and my third main character share the same name. Isn't that just a nice coincidence? Thanks for finally revealing yourself. :p

Kyaroru: Yep, they do. And no need for apology, I share the same sentiment. (",)

RanchanAkanechan08: If you've read this chapter, you'll realize that I didn't. Thanks for reviewing!

Clarise: A threatening finger, eh? Well, wag no more. Your finger has been popping in my dreams and I was afraid that it would haunt me forever, so I made Akane end up with Ranma. Hehe. p


	8. Of Chocolates And Emeralds

**Author's Notes:** A little more to go, and it's a wrap! It's just that I've been held back by tons of homework and tests and stuff, so I wasn't able to write a lot for the past week. And something quite intrigued me because I received an anonymous email about another author copying my work, _Changed Overnight_. I checked it out and saw – WOW – a lot of "accidental" similarities: character lines, descriptions, scenes and their orders, italicized words…

But I wasn't disheartened. Instead, I wrote more. So there you go.

**Disclaimer:** Nope, still not mine. Even with faith, trust, and pixie dust.

* * *

**The Diary of Akane Tendo**

**Chapter Eight: Of Chocolates and Emeralds**

**Thursday, 10 am, the little balcony outside my room**

The call turned out to be from Sayuri and Yuka. I just told them what happened last night, and they were practically squealing and screaming into Yuka's speakerphone! Sayuri choked on a walnut when I described the kisses that Ranma and I had last night and arrived at the part where we had Frenched. And although Yuka sounded really worried because she didn't know how to do the Heimlich maneuver and Sayuri was already choking on that big walnut for a long time, I couldn't stop myself from laughing inwardly as the walnut finally got itself out of my friend's throat.

"Are you okay?" I asked over the phone, suppressing a giggle.

Sayuri coughed a few times. "Y-yeah, I'm fine… it's just that everyone at school saw what happened but nobody knew how you both actually _felt_ while you were doing… you know, the kiss. Wasn't it _slobbery_?"

"Oh, don't mind her," Yuka scoffed. "She's just jealous because she hasn't Frenched anyone yet."

There was a sound of a pillow being thrown, followed by giggles from both of them.

"No, it wasn't slobbery at all," I answered after a few moments when they were back into sane mode. "It was…"

"It was…?" They both echoed, waiting for me to bridge the gap.

"It was wet. Wet… and sweet. And wonderful."

"But isn't wet just like… slobbery?" Sayuri asked. I tsk-tsked and said no.

"Wet?" Yuka repeated. "Wonderful… but wet?"

"No, not gross-wet," I clarified. "See, when you French, you actually put your tongue into your partner's mouth." At this point, Sayuri and Yuka gasped excitedly, as if they didn't know what Frenching was, hah. I think they were just so thrilled at the way I told the whole thing in my perspective. "Yes, my ladies, it was sweetly wet. And hunger-inducing. It's like Pepsi, actually, because you've got to ask for more."

I laughed, forgiving my shallow sense of humor, and continued. "Then when we arrived home, we kissed some more in secret behind the thick tree in the lawn – you remember that, Yuka, right? You climbed it a year ago because the wind blew your hanky and it got tangled up in the branches, and then you fell flat on your butt." I laughed again as Yuka reprimanded me jokingly.

"Speaking of butts," Sayuri butted in, "do you know what happened to Kuno-sempai when he tried to hold your sister's butt?"

I instantly remembered Kuno's hands crawling down Nabiki's back, because it was the thing I last saw before Ranma arrived at the dance last night. "Knowing Nabiki, she must have death-gripped Kuno's hand before it grabbed her butt and slapped his face. After that, she should have gone back to dancing with him." It was the most Nabiki-ish thing my sister would have done.

"Actually, Akane, Hiroshi said that Kuno's hand got to squeeze your sister's butt. And the death grip did happen, but not to any part of Kuno's body, save for his collar. She dragged him all the way into the ladies' room where we came out earlier."

"And then she beat him up there, right, Sayuri?" I asked confidently.

"Uhm," Yuka answered for Sayuri, who kept her mouth far away from the speakerphone as she started laughing loudly. "I don't think so, based on the accounts of the witnesses. They're the girls who were in the ladies' room just before Nabiki commanded them to leave. They were curious enough to hang around and listen outside the locked door, and they said they heard sounds of smooching and stuff."

I dropped the receiver in shock. OHMIGOD, MY SISTER FINALLY LET IT HAPPEN! The phone swung from the cord for a minute before I picked it up and my speech wasn't inoperative anymore. "_You mean they did it?_" I asked incredulously. "_Kuno and Nabiki?_"

"Nobody actually saw, but the girls _heard_…"

Then, before I could even stop myself, I squealed, jumped up and down, and finally screamed. Kuno was out of my system forever and my sister finally let it all out! I'm so happy for Kuno and Nabiki; they're a very attuned pair! I mean, I didn't know in what way, because Nabiki's too smart for him, but whatever.

When I regained my sanity, I asked Yuka what else happened.

"Well, the blonde guy who was with Ukyou kept stepping on her toes while they danced, and Ukyou finally lost it and told him to get out, saying that she 'never should have invited a double-faced loser' like him to the dance, and that the reason she invited him was that she didn't want to come without a date or something. The guy left, and Ukyou almost fainted when she turned around and saw you locking lips with Ranma."

Oh well, that was one earnest try from Tsubasa. His dream would never ever come true.

"And then," Sayuri said, having gotten over her fit of laugher, "your friend Ryouga showed up."

_So that wasn't a hallucination_, I thought happily, thankful that I wasn't going mad. _I really did see him! _"What happened to Ryouga? I never got to meet him last night."

"When he saw that the all the students of the school were gathered into a great circle on the dance floor, eagerly looking at the same thing, curiosity got the better of him and he took a peek. And… well, he saw you kissing Ranma, and that was the same second when he slipped his tongue into your mouth, I think," Sayuri said, squealing. "The next thing I looked, he was gone. Even Hiroshi and Daisuke didn't notice him go (they were both too busy drooling over what you were doing with Ranma anyway)."

"Oh…" was all I could say. I'm a little worried about that guy – he shows up with a grin on his face one second and then leaves after a few. His abysmal sense of direction never helps him, either… he should just stay in the dojo as often as possible for his own sake. Poor Ryouga.

"Yeah, and that Chinese girl who looked after the noodles… what was her name again? Soap?"

"Shampoo," I corrected.

"Yes, Shampoo," Yuka continued. "She went ballistic and pulled the chopsticks from her hair."

"And ate all the noodles in depression?" I asked in jest.

"No, actually, the… _chopsticks_ had little sharp blades inside of them, and she was about to – what did she say she wanted to do? Oh yeah – she wanted to _kill_ you. And she said it in Chinese, by the way. She blabbed some more, and since Daisuke's Mandarin is very limited, he didn't understand the rest of it besides the kill part."

That was expected. Shampoo telling me she wanted to kill me has happened a lot of times before that I've regarded it as a welcome hug every time we met. "So how come she didn't get to do it?" _Surely, nobody in school could ever stop an Amazon like her…_

"It was Principal Kuno," Sayuri answered. "The moment Soap removed the chopsticks, her long hair fell behind her, and the next thing she knew, she was playing tag with the principal and his scissors."

"It's Shampoo," I rectified, as all three of us started laughing at the Amazon's fate. So Kuno's dad was still a cutting-hair-off fetishist? I never actually liked that trait in him, but since he stopped Shampoo from killing me last night, maybe I can let it pass.

And the storytelling continued, until I got into the part where Ranma carried me into my room and tucked me to sleep. Sayuri and Yuka gasped and asked if Ranma and I did _it_, but I said no, and that he'd never do that unless he feels we're both ready for it.

"You can't stop him from thinking and dreaming about it, though," Yuka said. "You know the male gender. And if you don't, you can just get context clues from how he kissed you last night."

"Mwah, mwah, mwah," Sayuri moaned teasingly in the phone.

"Oh, shut up, or I'll make you choke on a walnut again."

So here I am, writing on this diary like what I've been doing since last week when I engaged into this obsession. I feel like if I don't take the events of my life down, time will come when I am old and forgetful, and I may never get the chance to recall the things that have happened in my younger years. Too bad I've only started writing on a diary now, when I've had so many unforgettable experiences when I was a kid, but at least it's not too late. I'm sixteen, anyway, and that's the sweetest year of a person's life, as what Grandpa Happosai once told me last month before he went out into his lingerie escapade and never came back.

Hey, the wind's starting to get stronger and colder. My ears feel sort of stung or something, I'd better head back inside my room; I'll look for Ranma and–

It's Kasumi knocking on my door again, saying I have another phone call. Now who could it be? I'll leave you inside my drawer awhile, sweet little diary… hide yourself, okay?

* * *

**Thursday, my room**

Am on my way to the hospital; Niles the butler just called and told me that Avery's admitted there. What in the world could have happened to him? I am so worried. Later.

* * *

**Thursday, 3 pm, room 510 of the Nerima City Hospital**

Someone once said that every time a door opens, another one in some corner of the globe closes. The same happens when you close the door to your room – somewhere on this planet, a door opens. And when every door on earth is opened at the same time, the world will be full of holes on that day. The guy who said that believed that that day would never happen, because it is impossible that anybody's door would never close at least once in one day. He said that doors are like the lives of the people on this earth, and that every time a newborn baby shrieks in some hospital, a human being somewhere dies of sickness, accident, or age in turn.

That guy was lying. I am so, so, SO sure.

Because Avery's admission room is located near the Nursery, where all the newborn babies were screaming. For the new mommies and daddies, their cries were music to their ears, but to me, they might as well have sounded terribly like fingernails scratching the chalkboard.

Avery is frailly sleeping on the hospital bed in front of me, unaware that the nurse has checked him up twice already.

When I arrived at the hospital, Niles wasn't waiting for me at the entrance unlike what he said over the phone. I was about to ask the nurse at the front counter where Avery Hanabishi's room was, when someone tapped my shoulder. I turned and saw a really tall guy, almost six feet tall and a few years my senior, a diamond earring studded on his left earlobe. He had long brown hair that reached several inches below his shoulders, and he was wearing a buttoned-up black overcoat.

And did I say that he was one of the most beautiful men I have ever met – _beautiful_ being the operative word? No, not that he looked gay or anything, but his skin was so fair, and his nose and lips were perfect. His eyebrows had a distinct shape that emphasized his uncompromising appearance. A tinge of jealousy built up inside of me – it was not fair that a MAN could look _that_ beautiful!

"Akane Tendo, am I correct?"

"Y-yes," I tentatively replied as he led both of us away from the counter where the nurse eyed us watchfully before going back to answering the phone that kept on ringing irritatingly. I stared at the tall guy, trying to place where I've seen him before. I really knew that I haven't, because he is so far the tallest person I have ever seen, but there was something about those emerald eyes that kept tugging at my memory…

"I'm Anthony Hanabishi, the brother of Avery," he said as he held out a hand that I shook shyly. "He is upstairs." His face was unreadable, if not expressionless. Wasn't he even worried about his brother? If so, it certainly didn't show.

"What happened to him?" I asked, having regained my poise as we proceeded into the elevator. "Did he have an accident? Is he hurt badly?"

"There were no accidents," Anthony replied calmly as he pushed the "5" button. I noticed that his accent didn't seem to be of pure Japanese; it even held a more British tone than Avery's.

"Why? Was it intentional?" I asked worriedly, thinking about assassins out to get one of the last heirs of Hanabishi so the criminal mastermind could finally take hold of all the family riches.

The sensation of having left my stomach on the ground floor passed me as the elevator went up. A few seconds before the door rang and opened, he said, "Nobody tried to hurt him, do not worry." We got out and turned right into a hallway, then turned left after a few yards. We passed by a room with a wide glass window, where we saw about twenty babies with name straps around their wrists as they were screaming their lungs out and two very harassed-looking nurses attended them. Anthony stopped at the fifth room. "Here we are," he declared as his hand rested on the doorknob.

I took a deep, nervous breath and waited for Anthony to open the door. It wasn't until a few seconds later did I realize that he never turned the knob. I looked at him, and for the very first time, I saw him smiling mildly at me – a smile that completely affirmed that he was Avery's brother, even though it was just a tiny fraction of Avery's exquisite ones. "Do not be scared of seeing him bloody and dead. He is just having another treatment."

I heaved a sigh of relief, until I realized that treatments weren't good, either. _A treatment for what? He never told me he was having treatments_, I thought uneasily.

"One more thing," Anthony added one last time as he was about to turn the knob. His face went back to being passive. "I did not tell Avery that I invited you. I just saw your picture inserted on a torn page of his diary, which was hidden inside the drawer of his room. I just thought that it would be a pleasant surprise to uplift his spirits, and Niles helped me contact you. You do not mind, I suppose?"

I shook my head after I blushed inwardly when I found out that Avery kept a picture of me in his diary (I don't even have a picture of Ranma in mine, or anybody's picture at that). "Not at all. If I did, I wouldn't be here, would I?"

Although he turned his head a little away from me, I saw a corner of his mouth turning up against his will even when he fought to keep his face expressionless, as he mumbled something like, _"No wonder he kept this girl's picture…"_ Or something like that. When he faced me again, I raised my eyebrow and returned his hidden smile.

Without knocking, he opened the door, and the first thing I saw was white. Blindingly white sheets, walls, chairs, everything. And then we found Avery, his eyes closed, resting on a hospital bed which was bent at an elevated angle. He shifted a little and turned his head towards the direction of the curtained window across us. A needle was inserted into his wrist, and a pack of clear liquid hanging on a shaft entered his veins, drop by drop.

It seemed that Anthony knew that Avery wasn't really asleep but just closing his tired eyes, because he didn't bother shake his brother up when he said, "Someone sent you flowers, Maggot. The card says it is from…" (he pretends to read an imaginary card with difficulty. I noticed that his tone was so much brighter and affectionate than the tone he'd been using when we were talking earlier) "She is just probably one of your admirers in your new school; perhaps I should just throw these roses away. They are from an… Akane Tendo. Do you know her?"

"Akane?" Avery quickly sat up on his bed and cringed as he hastily held his chest. "No, don't throw them! She–" He stopped when our eyes met. His anxious look instantly softened, but his eyes still held the glisten they contained when he saw me in surprise.

"She is here," Anthony finished for him, point-blank. "Who she is to you, I have no idea, but it appears that she means more to you than the fur coat that Mother gave you. Before you ask anything, I would like to say that her picture was inserted in your journal, and I could not find Mother's coat anywhere in the mansion. Should you open your mouth to complain though, brother, about inviting your friend here, I advise you to think twice about it. I believe you will thank me later." And with that, he closed the door behind me, leaving me and Avery alone together inside room 510.

And I just stood there while Avery looked at me as though I were a hallucination. Finally, after a few moments, Avery blinked and groaned. "Geez, how rude of me… A-Akane, please sit down." His voice was really low and soft as he gestured towards a white couch against the window. I crossed the room and slowly took a seat.

The low hum of the air conditioner prevented the silence from being deafening.

"Don't worry about Ton-ton, he's just putting on a tough act," Avery piped up. "He's really as nice as a bunny, my twenty-year old brother. I'm planning to tell him about the coat anyway."

"Oh… but it was definitely nice of him to lead me all the way here…" My voice faded out. Sometimes, even with the motor mouth that I have, I cannot seem to talk much at the right time when there's much talking needed. A few moments passed before either of us spoke up. "Look, Niles called me to come here, and then I met your brother, and then he told me that you weren't hurt, and then he led me here, and…"

Avery was about to open his mouth when I cut him off and started getting up. "And if I disturbed you in _any way_, it's okay… I could just leave so you could r–"

"No," he interrupted quickly, looking beleaguered, and then relieved when I sat back down. "I… I want you to stay."

After hesitating, but deciding to do it anyway, I asked Avery, "Why are you here? What happened?"

Avery took a deep, poignant breath and lay back down on his inclined pillow. "Remember when we met at the cemetery, Akane?" he asked softly. I immediately feared that his reference to the place where the dead were buried meant something terrible was about to happen. "I was visiting my grandfather who died of lung cancer."

I was unsure of where it led, but I kept listening.

"And if I'm right, I think I told you last week at lunch that both my parents… they died in a plane crash."

"Yes, you did. I remember." That was the time I found out that he was as rich as a prince.

"Well, they were actually traveling from Britain to the States. My mom accompanied my dad in the trip because she wanted to be there when… when my dad would undergo an operation in the lungs. Something began to grow there, and the diagnosis said that it was cancerous and would do a lot of harm if it wasn't removed. If my parents ever lived through that accident, Father would have been operated, and then he would have undergone chemotherapy." He sighed painfully. "So you see… it sort of runs… i-it's hereditary," he finished.

At the edge of my seat, I put my hands in front of my open mouth. "Oh _Kami-sama_…" Before I could even stop myself, I started bawling like a little girl and ran to embrace him. He winced, and I quickly withdrew my arms. "W-what's wrong?"

He groaned. "Nothing, it's just the stubborn lesion from yesterday." Before he could close the untied strings in front of his white patient uniform, I already saw on his chest a thick, red wound a few inches long. Several stitches prevented it from opening. My eyes started watering again, and he quickly said, "Don't worry, I'm totally fine. My ankles are as strong as ever and I could still prevent you from facing your daily dose of perverts in the morning." He tried to laugh, but it was immediately followed by a fit of coughs that transformed his calm face into one undergoing so much pain. He clutched his white blanket.

"Should I get the nurse?" I asked, panicking.

He cleared his throat and inhaled. "No, I'm fine, it's just that I was just operated in the lungs. After a few days I'll be able to laugh with you about Kuno and whatnot." He flashed me a gentle smile. The light behind me made his emerald eyes sparkle, and I figured that as long as his eyes still held that glint, he's fine.

"So that's why you were absent from school yesterday? You were operated… and not kidnapped by some mafia gang leader or something?" I asked after sniffing my wet nose and trying to smile.

His smile grew brighter. "Now there you are, Akane… I was wondering where you were hiding," he said lightheartedly.

I sobbed. "Oh, Avery…" Being very careful not to touch his surgical wound, I embraced him again and buried my face in his neck. He smelled like somewhere between isopropyl alcohol and _Hugo_. I felt both his arms encircling me. "You're so stupid! Why didn't you tell me about your… your condition?"

"I was afraid that you wouldn't have treated me the same way you have since I've known you. You were my first friend in Furinkan, and I liked you very much; I didn't want you to treat me… _differently_ just because you thought I was… I was fragile."

"I never would have," I wept. Deep inside, I wondered if that was really true.

I felt him reaching for something to his right, and then recoiling a bit, perhaps in pain. I quickly got up from embracing him, but I was still leaning on his bed. After trying to blink my tears off a few times, I saw Avery holding up a white handkerchief, his hand approaching my face. The next thing I knew he was wiping my tears away. "I'm not going to die, Akane," he said assuredly, like he knew what was going on in my head, his voice still soft but with a certain sureness to it. "You told me you would feel depressed if you spent the last day of your life drowning in misery. The day I got to know you, I knew I'd never meet that fate."

I gave out a sound that sounded like a cross between a sob and a chuckle. "Besides being my solace, did I ever tell you that you are my magic mirror? It's like whenever I ask you_, 'Mirror, Mirror, on the wall, who is the fairest one of all?'_, you would always say, _'The fairest in the land is you.'_ You're my box of chocolates. You always make me feel better."

He exhaled, his smile turning into a bright grin. "Speaking of chocolates, Jacque's been too generous and I'm afraid I'll get diabetes before I get out of this hospital if I'm the only one who'd consume all the chocolates he gave me." His eyes settled on a small white refrigerator. "I was hoping you'd help."

"And be diagnosed with diabetes with you? Why not." Jacque Torres made the best chocolates in the world (but maybe next to Willy Wonka and the oompaloompas), and since chocolates have happiness-inducing stuff called amphetamines or endorphins or whatever, then hey. No harm done. I opened the fridge and almost gasped at its contents – a big mineral water bottle. And the rest were chocolates. Boxes of them.

We spent our time eating chocolates while chitchatting about stuff as I took a seat on the edge of his bed. He told me that he was leaving for Britain in a few weeks, and it brought out so much dread in me, besides the fact that the clipboard at the end of his bed said some critical things about the patient in the room. He said I shouldn't worry, and instead of talking about negative things, we should talk about the positive ones. So I told him everything that happened yesterday – from my unwillingness to go to the dance, to Nabiki's pep talk, to the whole wanting-to-puke thing, to Sayuri and Yuka and the germy comfort room stall, to Kuno and my sister's kissing escapade in the rest room. Avery and I laughed about that.

"Your sister sure has a… queer taste," he said amusedly.

"Well, nobody understands how her mind works. She's one complex human being."

He fidgeted a little, and proceeded to one topic I didn't really want to discuss, because it had always kept my hopes up that sometime, someone was bound to ask me to the dance (but really, all is okay now. The chess varsity player and his halitosis did well without me). "I'm sorry I wasn't able to ask you to the dance… it's just that… well, you know," he finished awkwardly. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you about my absence yesterday – I'd known when the operation would take place since last week. If things were different, I'd have gone to school yesterday… and I'd have asked you out the moment I found out last week about the Winter Dance."

I don't know if he knew the misery I underwent in hoping that he or Ranma would ask me to the dance, but his eyes communicated an apology to me. It was like he was saying that he never meant to _not_ ask me, and that he experienced a pain different from his cancer when he held himself back in asking me. The many talks we've had – inspirational, philosophical, senseless or what. All those days when we were together. He'd been holding back from saying "Will you go to the dance with me?" because he knew he could not be there, even if he wanted to.

"It's okay. I still enjoyed the dance." _More than I ever would have_, I thought. I offered him a smile, which he returned.

"About… a-about the thing at the rooftop," he began.

What was the world trying to do? Making the dreaded scenes fall in line and replay one after another?

I inhaled tensely as Avery clutched my hand. "You told me to tell Sakuragi to go for it."

"What?"

"My friend Sakuragi, remember? You told me that in soap operas, everyone lives happily ever after. And so you told me to tell Sakuragi to… go for it." He had this spangle in his eyes that told me he knew that I knew what he really meant.

"Oh, I did, didn't I?" I asked, laughing nervously, fearing that my hand – the one in his – would start sweating even in the air-conditioned room. I kept my eyes on the box of chocolates on the side table. "So what did Sakuragi do?"

"Well…" His eyes darted toward the interesting white curtains all of a sudden. "He went for it," he replied. I noticed his hold tighten a bit. "He… made a move on Sakura. But he didn't have the chance to say he loves her."

"S-so, when does he plan to say it?" I said in an unnaturally high voice, my heart thumping against my chest as I repeated the words _I love Ranma Saotome, I love Ranma Saotome_ in my head.

He tugged on my hand so that I drowned in that sea of green again. "_Akane, I love you_."

I was stunned for a few seconds, but before I could even regain my composure, he pulled me close. And kissed me. Yet again.

Okay. I have to say, even with the kissing marathon I had with Ranma last night, that kisses on the lips never ceased to amaze me. So far, the only people who have kissed me on the lips aren't the ones I wouldn't want to be kissing with. Avery's lips were still soft and nice and sweet, but unlike what happened on the rooftop, we didn't go into Frenching. His lips stayed still against mine.

After five – ten, fifteen, I lost count – seconds, he released my hand and I pulled my lips away from his. "_I love Ranma,_" I whispered, standing beside his bed.

I didn't even wait until I found out what was happening – those three words tumbled out of my mouth like it was the most natural thing to occur. And I didn't say "I love _someone else_," because I think every fiber of my being has registered Ranma Saotome as someone _important_, and never a someone _else_.

The moment I said the truth to Avery, I expected myself to clasp a hand to my mouth and be all emotional about it as Avery poured out all his emotions and love for me.

Nope, that didn't happen.

"It's got to be the fireworks," he muttered almost inaudibly, smiling mildly. He was gazing at his slightly trembling palms on his lap. That totally, totally surprised me… I mean, I've dumped guys before, and Avery's reaction had nothing in common with theirs! Avery's mysteries can never be unlocked – even if one secret had just been opened, there are a hundred more doors that are in this long twisted maze.

"Fireworks?" I echoed, my sense of reason and memory slipping for a moment.

"There were none of them." He looked at me. His eyes were so trusting and clear and innocent and beautifully verdant. Somehow, even with the smile painted on his lips that told me he understood and accepted why it didn't quite happen the way he wanted to, I saw behind the bright green a little tinge of hurt and pain – the kind that didn't come from the wound from his operation. I reckon he tried to hide it, but I knew him too well to miss it.

Just then, there was a snappy rap outside the door and a young nurse came in the room, carrying another one of those packs full of clear liquid. "Good day, Mr. Hanabishi," she greeted, trying in vain to contain her enthusiasm. "A dose of Taxol, 280 mil." She began replacing the empty pack on top of the shaft beside Avery's bed.

"Same to you, Yui. This is Akane, by the way," Avery said, his voice much brighter than it was a second ago. "My… my friend."

Nurse Yui and I greeted each other (oh yes, she did seem happier when Avery introduced me as a _friend_), and she gave Avery some reminders about taking care of himself before she went out of the room.

"She seems to have a little bit of a crush on you, doesn't she?" I asked to break the silence. He chuckled weakly. I added, "I tell you, you'll take this hospital by storm when the news of a really fine-looking patient in 510 leaks out. Now I know why those nurse fantasies are very popular…"

"I know," he agreed jokingly. "It's my kind of condition that needs a lot of TLC, so maybe it's the nurses' lucky break at last…"

I giggled. And then everything came back to the milieu before Nurse Yui entered the room. In some weird way, Avery knew we had to pick up from where we left, or else time would eventually run out, or something.

"The fireworks would always decide who's the one for you," he said all of a sudden right after the joke about nurse fantasies. "And you saw none, yes?"

His palms on his lap started quivering again, maybe from the cold, maybe from something else, so I clasped both my hands around them. "I saw none."

He looked at me meaningfully and said, "Me too."

I don't know if he meant that, or if he just said it to prevent further complications, but I know he did it for the better – and knowing Avery, it might as well have been the truth.

"Okay, well maybe _a spark_, but not really fireworks," he added hastily. He looked hesitant and tense, maybe fearing what I'd say about it.

Instead of being all mushy and full of drama with words, I smiled an assuring one, holding his cold hands tighter. "So… how do you feel?" I don't know if I meant to ask him about his physical condition, or how he felt about… well, the truth.

After a few seconds, his gaze switched from me to the liquid inside the packet on the pole dripping into a long narrow plastic tube that was connected to the needle inserted in his wrist.

"It seems not too long ago when I entered Taekwondo tournaments, or quiz bees and science or math contests at this time of the month," he began. "Now I find myself on a hospital bed with nurses fussing over me and telling me not to move too much because of my fragile condition. There's a needle inside my wrist and a lot of medications have gone through it just to enter my bloodstream. Anesthesia, sleeping stuff, vitamins, anti-cancer things like Taxol, and that horrible reddish black goo finding its way out of me all the time… You know, the life you see me in right now is way off the ideal one I've been dreaming of since I was a kid. And I'll be going through this every month until the bad cancer cells are all killed inside my body. My ideal life has passed me by, Akane." He sighed. His gaze went back to my eyes.

"I feel like my heart turned into a toe, and grew an ingrown the size of a thick, hardbound math book," he finished, the evocativeness in his eyes telling me that he was not talking about chemotherapy anymore.

"Ouch," I said, almost feeling the pain myself.

His hands moved beneath mine, so that it was his that were clasping mine. "Akane, the medication will have its effect on me soon. I'll be drifting off in a few minutes… and you're cold, even with your jacket on. If you don't leave now, maybe you'll catch a cold later on the streets."

"I guess I'll just hang around as a frozen snowdrop then," I replied, laughing quietly. "I kinda want it that way to get into the winter spirit." Withdrawing my hand from his clutch, I messed his unruly brown hair up.

"Good night then," he said, yawning demurely and closing his eyes. I'd thought he'd fallen asleep already, but with his eyes closed, he still managed to whisper a few more things before consciousness left him – a few more things that made me feel I was indeed the luckiest girl alive to have known a friend like Avery Hanabishi.

"Thank you, Akane…" he murmured as his green eyes were slowly covered by his eyelids. "For everything, for being there, for being the Akane that you are. My experience in Nerima wouldn't be the same without you, and I mean that in a really, really good way. No matter where life would take me – whether it would be in some other country or city, or up there in the clouds in the future, I would always remember you. You colored my life when it was at the peak of its grayscale boringness, and I daresay only angels could do that. I don't know how you ended up down here on earth, but I thank God that he sent you on a mission… otherwise, my life would have been just a dreary ditch of hotels, haciendas, greens, science, math, history, chocolate, cancer cells and chemotherapy."

Thinking that he's already fallen asleep, I was about to open my mouth and say something in reply when he let out a Freudian Slip. It's one of those things where you say your deepest, clandestine thoughts at the time when your mind's defenses are at their weakest. For example, you introduce your best boy buddy to your friend, and you end up saying, "This is Mark, my _boy_friend" instead of saying "_best_ friend." And then you end up cringing at the mistake you just did.

Avery didn't cringe, however. Those four words were the last ones he uttered before sleep finally claimed him.

"_I love you, Akane."_

I smiled, gave out a sob, leaned toward him, gave him one last affectionate kiss on the corner of his lips, and cried silently as I slowly sat down on the couch.

I cried because a person like him never deserved this fate, and never will. Because his life would have stretched out long and productive before him if not for Destiny's cruelty towards the wrong people. Because when he's gone, I won't have anybody to give me chocolates anymore, or talk about stuff at lunch as people stared at us like we were some alien species inside a cage. Because I'm going to miss his intelligence, sweetness, awesomeness, serenity, chocolaty chestnut brown hair and bright emerald eyes when he leaves. Because his strong ankles wouldn't get to be developed to their full Aquarius potential.

Because he never knew Ranma, the one who holds my heart. Because Ranma never knew him, the one who'll always be in my heart. Because Ranma would never find out how lucky he is to have such a healthy body and have people fighting him for it. Because if Ranma feels like the luckiest man in the world on account of the fact that the girl he loves also loves him back, he doesn't know that somewhere in this world, someone feels the opposite because he's got one of his feet on the grave, and the girl he loves only sees him as a special _friend_, forcing him to suppress his feelings and say that he feels the same way, too. Because billions of people in the world just take their lives for granted. Because millions of them just decide to commit suicide like that, like it's as easy as baking cookies for Santa on Christmas night. Because thousands of them die unwillingly, and those people are the ones who'd make really big changes to the world if they were alive.

But mostly, I cried because Avery was one of those people. Because even though he said that he was fine and that he wasn't going to die, the doctor's report on the clipboard said several things that contradicted the things he said to me.

Because somewhere along the way, I got lost, and he pulled me back to the right path. Because in doing so, he made me fall in love with him. Because I slowly fell out of it, for the reason that he was much too perfect and I was much too flawed and I realized that Ranma Saotome was my one true love. Because despite all of that, the fact that I fell in love with him still cannot be denied.

And I cried, because he would never know.

* * *

**Thursday, my room**

When I woke up, I immediately peeked through the white curtains covering the window at 510. The sun was barely visible behind the mountains, and the sky was a mixture of a lot of dark blue and a little violet and pink. I gasped and was about to cover my mouth with the noise I made that was sure to wake Avery up, when something really warm and furry brushed my skin. I realized that the reason that I'd been feeling much warmer and more comfortable than a few hours ago was because the white fur overcoat Avery lent me was covering my should-have-been-shivering body.

I looked over to the hospital bed and saw that Avery was quietly sleeping like an angel, vaguely shuddering because of the cold. The next thing I knew, even when I already decided to get up and leave, I was lost in my thoughts about what happened the last nine days with Avery, and what would happen in the next days without him.

The sound of the door opening pulled me back to reality. Unconsciously, a smile crept up on my lips as the sight of Ranma Saotome made my heart function again and the blood in my veins flow robustly as it did before I learned about the dreadful news. Without a word, without asking me why I'd gone without telling anybody where I went, he helped me up from the sofa and into the fur coat. After one last look at Avery, we left the room and closed the door behind us.

As silent as our departure came the tears rolling down my cheeks. I dropped on my weak knees, and Ranma knelt down beside me. Instead of telling me to stop crying, Ranma took a leaf out of Dr. Phil's book and just let me cry in his embrace. Maybe he found out that suppressing emotions isn't good, or maybe he just sensed that there was no use stopping me from crying because the issue at hand was worthy of a crying session.

And then I felt a hand pull me up by the collar of the fur coat; the same hand pulled Ranma up. We both turned at the same time to find a very tall man with an emotionless, almost stern face like it was one of the carved faces on Mt. Rushmore. His hand calmly searched for something inside the right pocket of his black coat, and when he found it, he offered it to me.

A white handkerchief. Just like the one Avery had wiped my face with.

"Thank you," I said quietly, taking it and wiping my tears to prevent me from looking sore and wet. And then I abruptly remembered that I was wearing the white overcoat that he said belonged to his mother, so I made a move to get out of it.

"Stop," he said, his voice as inexpressive as his face. "I want you to keep and take care of it."

I sniffed the wetness inside my nose. "Why?"

"I want you to treasure it the way you treasure your friendship with my little brother."

"Why?" I asked again, wanting to hear more of his voice so I could detect even a tinge of emotion as to not succumb to the belief that he is just some android from the future. And I had to suppress a giggle when I saw a slight upward movement with his left eyebrow.

"No more questions, just go. Night is falling and it will be much colder than this morning." His voice was softer. "And keep the handkerchief," he added, nodding goodbye to Ranma and me.

I smiled. "Thanks…" Ranma had already turned to go, but I just had to add something to my word of gratitude. You know, just to leave a mark, or something. My smile widened as I stood on tiptoe, leaned toward his ear and whispered: "…_Ton-ton_."

Well, I couldn't help it! The guy was so stiff, and Avery did call him that baby name. For a second, I feared that the six-footer would choke me to death for calling me the name that I guessed was as well-kept as the secret of the Holy Grail, because his eyebrows met in the middle and his eyes narrowed into tiny slits.

Until his expression softened and he flashed me a lopsided, you-nasty-child grin that made me grin back at him. He patted my head. "Go home, Maggot."

And with that, I turned around and caught up with Ranma.

"What was that about?" he asked me bewilderedly.

"Nothing," I giggled, making sure that Ranma knew that I was okay now. We were passing by the nursery, and the lot had increased in number. There were about five more bald babies inside already.

I saw Ranma looking at them, fascinated, then his attention focused on the corridor again as he slowly pulled me close with an arm around my shoulders. "Someday…" he whispered dreamily as we walked to the elevator.

And that di-syllabic word touched and amused me so much, that the moment we got inside the elevator, I put my arms around him and gave him a deep, warm kiss – one that lasted five floors. I pulled away just before the door opened and the people from the first floor hastily entered. We got out and walked all the way home, with my arm around Ranma's waist, his around my shoulder, and the furry gift from the Hanabishis hugging my body, preventing me from feeling too cold.

Most of the big chunk of truth has sunken in already, and the little bits are slowly settling in. The world has its ways of revolving and rotating, after all. Things are going to be like that until the sun goes out. I am just praying that _Kami-sama_ makes everything okay for everyone, and that not-okay stuff would be soon okay when everybody opens their hearts up to the way of the world.

Oh yeah, I'm also praying that Avery would wake up and read the letter (using a torn page from my diary) I left on his side table before _Ton-ton_ gets to it first. Ranma told me that he and Anthony had a little chitchat outside the room when I was still asleep, and he was told about Avery's condition and how I came to be there in the hospital. Ranma was also told that big brother Hanabishi had been… eavesdropping on my conversation with Avery. He looks all dignified and wise and all that, but deep inside he's just a humongous maggot himself…

And nope, Ranma and I still haven't told everyone at home about _us_. We plan to break it to them gently, like water on sand instead of rocks. That way not everybody would get horribly drunk in the merrymaking process.

Oh, what the heck. The conversation I had with Ranma a while ago just made me want to tell the whole world!

Savoring the last of our affection for the night on account of the fact that we were outside the house already, Ranma held me in a tight embrace. "I'm scared too, ya know." He pulled away and put both his hands on my shoulders. "And Anthony kept strangling his tears back. Everybody's sad and scared and stuff."

"I know," I agreed silently. "Things just happened too fast. The truth hurts so much."

I guess, when I looked straight into Ranma's eyes that moment, he saw the pain that I felt. He said, "Hey, you're not alone. You never will be."

And he kissed me. A sweet, lingering one.

"Because I love you."

Thus, I entered the house first, and he followed after a minute. The whole getting together thing was hard to conceal from the family, and I'm glad we wouldn't be stalling for long.

* * *

**Author's Notes:** I don't know if it was because of the death of my friend Klarence or the fact that someone plagiarized my work that I came up with this really sad chapter. I just don't know. But either way, I want to thank everybody who've been supporting me with reviews and emails! I owe you guys a whole lot of love and better chapters. (",) The next one would be done before or during the holidays, I think. The long Christmas vacation stretches ahead like a path paved in gold, computer chips, and hands on hot chocolate-stained keyboards…

And another thing, my inspiration for Anthony Hanabishi, Avery's brother, is Sesshoumaru from InuYasha (well, who else would make a very beautiful man? Moreover, if you just learned that Avery had a brother, then I suggest that you go back to the second chapter, the scene where Avery and Akane were eating lunch together. Avery _did_ mention about having an older brother in a private school). Only he has brown hair and green eyes, and Sesshoumaru has silver hair and yellow eyes. Oh, and Anthony isn't a demon. ;)

* * *

kenshinlover2002: I will, thanks. And I got that note from one of those teen magazine articles about the pick-up lines guys usually use… one of them included "Are you from Tennessee? Because you're the only _ten I see_!" and other weird, funny, and able-to-work ones. Yep, at this point in time I can assure you that they would be together until the end.

Kathya: Thank you and you're welcome.

Ikerana: Hey, thanks! I'm glad I made you happy. And I have to admit that the whole kiss thing left me at a loss for adjectives one time because there weren't enough words to describe the feeling of kissing someone you love… if you know what I mean. Incredible, indeed. (",)

avery hawke: Avery, my character and reader (I still can't get over the nice coincidence)! I have to say that I always look forward to your reviews… they're the ones I could relate to the most, what with the Princess Diaries stuff and all. Actually, I got the idea of the seventh chapter from the Princess Diaries when they had the Nondenominational Dance. Remember when Mia came without a date feeling apprehensive and barf-ish, and Michael arrived in the middle of the Dance looking all ruffled? Yeah, that was it – they talked until Michael just kissed her… had me smiling distractedly the whole day, it did. (",) Thanks for reviewing, pal; it made me happy!

The-Shadow002: Thank you very much! I've skimmed over the chapter and did find some typos that I immediately corrected. The chapter's quite long indeed… I'm glad you like it. I really like the way you review the stories you've read – they offer much help to us fortunate authors because of the specific content you focus on, like particular scenes that were great and the ones that have a few spelling or grammatical errors in them. Again, thanks!

RiaSternchen: All I can say is one day, if you keep on reading fluff and mush like this fic, the sugar rush will give you diabetes… (",) But really, I agree with you – who cares? I myself have always been a fan of fluffy and cute fan fiction, and every time my sugar level goes up, I read more! Thank you for loving my story; of course I'll continue soon.

alanna28: True, true! I can only picture Ryouga writing really dark and seriously suicidal stuff when he finds out about Ranma and Akane being together once and for all. Yeah, the kissing, I know – there's just lots of it! Isn't that just nice? (",) About the pancake lessons from Ukyou, Ranma kept it a secret because he wanted to surprise the family on Christmas by cooking something for them, even if it's just flat, cooked batter. Glad you liked the whole Nabiki-Kuno thing; don't they just make a nice, weird couple, the epitome of opposites attract (I mean stupid and cunning)?

Darth Hawk 32: If you've read the eighth chapter, you'll find out the reason why Ukyou decided to go to the dance with Tsubasa. I haven't read the manga, but I could really tell that Ukyou and Tsubasa would never ever get together based on the anime series. Thanks for pointing it out.

celestial lelila: Well, I'm glad you finally left one. (",) Truth to tell, Akane was almost halfway to being with Avery for real… you might have noticed that she spent more time with Avery than with Ranma during the majority of the fic, and she did benefit from that emotionally. But it never happened fully, because I myself am a Ranma-Akane fan all the way. And yes, Avery's being too perfect was one of my cards, because I knew for sure that somebody _that_ perfect wouldn't be as compatible with Akane as Ranma is. And there you go, commending the POV and the Dr. Phil and Harry Potter references! I just wanted to add a little color from the real world. Gratitude, gratitude.

Drakus: Thank you so much for the praise! Come to think of it, many people like you have liked the POV of this story that I might make fan fiction in the future using this standpoint. Regarding Avery – if you've read this chapter, you'll find out that he was never perfect to begin with… he only seemed to be so. Again, thank you for reviewing!

Flash: Thanks! If you've read my other fics, you'll see that I am a huge fan of Ranma and Akane, and nothing less or more. And since you're wondering where Avery is, then hey, let's not leave him out of the picture! He's there… hanging by the frame…

f-zelda: Of course I'll finish the fic… I always try to finish all my fics (so far, the first multi-chapter fic I did, _Changed Overnight_, isn't finished yet, but I'll put an end to it once I'm done with The Diary). Well, Avery didn't go to the dance because his operation was scheduled on that day. That was just too sad for him, but it's got to happen, one way or another.


	9. A Whack Or Two

**Author's Notes:** Gratitude comes first, so I want to thank everybody for the awesome reviews! And thanks, too, for the comforting words about my loss of a friend. I have never, ever been touched by my reviewers like that before… just… thanks, everyone (sniff, sniff).

Okay! Now that I am in not-lamenting mode (and since November's depression's over anyway), let's lighten up the mood and let me play the role of Santa, hohoho! The last chapter was too miserable and sad, there was almost no humor in it. I am really sorry to those who looked forward to a nice laugh… ah, my emotions got the best of me! Here's a chapter much brighter than the last… I've thrown in some slapstick humor (chapter title gives it away) in some scenes, just spot them, it's really easy.

Gah, had to change the chapter title by the way, sorry. At first it was supposed to be "A Whack Or Two, Or Three…" as what I had posted (yet this chapter didn't come with replies then) but I was really OC with the "…" not showing up on the upper right chapter selection, so there. It's reduced to 4 words, and without the "…" too. Geez, what the hell am I doing, talking about the chapter title…

**Disclaimer:** Nope, not mine. I do hold possession of Avery and Anthony, though. But still.

* * *

**The Diary Of Akane Tendo**

**Chapter Nine: A Whack Or Two**

**Friday, December 10, 5 am**

I am just so bothered. I can't sleep.

If the Hanabishi clan's lung cancer is hereditary, wouldn't that mean that Anthony has it too?

No, why didn't I pay attention to my biology classes last year? I swear, I vaguely recall something about the punnett square, or something. Dominant… recessive… a box divided into four… if a couple has four children, and the male has a dominant gene of… dunno… hemophilia… no, say lung cancer… then I think two of the four children will be female, two will be male…

And then out of those two males,

one would have the cancer. He gets a dominant.

But would the other have it too? Or does he get it as a recessive and passes it on

to his kids? Grandkids?

I can't remember…

so

sleepy

Ranma

* * *

**Friday, World History**

This morning, I:

1.) destroyed my alarm clock 4 times,

2.) almost got my eye poked by the pen I left open on my diary,

3.) accidentally slapped Ranma as he shook me and tried to wake me up,

4.) was dragged out of bed by Nabiki (accidentally slapped her, too),

5.) was drenched in hot water as Ranma had accidentally poured a whole kettle on me,

6.) was drenched in hot miso soup as Kasumi had accidentally poured a bowl of it on me,

7.) fell asleep on my own miso soup bowl during breakfast,

8.) was whacked on the head by Nabiki (resolute, keen, intentional; flat look on face) to wake me up,

9.) was whacked on the head by Ranma (restrained, unwilling, intentional; sorry look on face) to wake me up, and

10.) fell asleep on Kuno as he, with the Furinkan High Hentai Horde, welcomed me at the school gates.

Oh, and let's not forget, I also:

11.) slept through all the subjects – Math and English, where my grades heavily rely on – before recess.

Because when the bell rang for recess, my girl classmates (throw in some other girls not from my class, and several female sophomores, juniors, and seniors; the lot also included sexually confused males) shook me violently and screamed at my ears with their high-pitched, shrieking voices and almost rendered me deaf when they asked me where Avery Hanabishi was, why he was absent now, why he was absent last Wednesday, and why he didn't come to the Winter Dance. Alarmed, I was woken up for several seconds before Ranma shooed the annoying crows away from my table, where I suspected a pool of drool was growing (thank my lucky stars there was not).

Ranma sat down beside me, and I didn't even care to arrange my hair, which I guess looked dreadfully like Scarecrow's from _The Wizard of Oz_. "Good night," I yawned, my eyes drooping, as my head plunged towards my desk.

"Wake up, tomboy, you can't afford to miss the lessons. Exams are coming up."

"Grfshin," I said, not raising my head from the comfort of my arms and my table.

"W-well, I took down the math notes for you… we're handling z-scores and inverse functions."

"Niashtabsh," I replied smartly, my voice vibrating on the desk.

"I copied Hiroshi's notes on English, too. Transitional devices and stuff. Ain't he just a nice, generous guy?"

"Beof, kagrit," I mumbled in gratitude.

Silence. I heard someone from the background shouting about Oreo cookies and King Kong.

"My dad and your dad found out about us already. They got a wedding preparation going on for tomorrow. Ryouga and I talked last night… ya think he'll make a good best man?"

"Choshgwo vamshrwai nut?" I asked (that was actually the longest sentence I have ever formed so far out of the Akane Alien Language).

He signed exhaustedly. "Okay, so the fathers didn't find out, and Ryouga and I didn't talk. He ambushed me a couple of times, though, that little… Can you wake up now? I'm concerned."

No reply. I guess I was drifting nearer to Dreamland that time (the reason why I am able to write this down now is with the help of Ranma himself, who narrated to me my exact words during the hard category question and answer under time pressure portion of the newest game show in town, _The Akane Link_).

"Hey, dya know? Someone stole my red shirt from you while you were sleeping. You know, the one you keep taking away from the hampers before sleep time every night? The one that smells like my sweat? The one that has its sleeve around you all the time?"

My head snapped up, and my torso followed suit. "_What_? Who stole it?"

Ranma was stunned, his eyes wide in disbelief, his eyebrows almost touching his hairline.

My eyes drooped again and my lips melted into a smile as I realized that he found out that what he just made up was actually true. "Good morning, honey," I greeted softly, resting my elbow on the desk and my head on my hand.

"G-good morning, too… _honey_…" he echoed, his hands reaching toward my hair to arrange the disordered side. "You fell asleep in Kuno's arms (what were you thinking?), and he was about to kiss you, so I pounded him and carried you here. And we were chased by the sumo wrestlers all the way to the second floor – it's a wonder why you never woke up – but I kicked one of them and they rolled down the stairs like big round rice cakes." He laughed at his own recollection.

(I just realized it now. Kuno was about to kiss me? Didn't he just kiss Nabiki the day before yesterday, in the ladies room during the dance? He is such a player. I need to tell Nabiki.)

"Your eyes are _beautiful_," I noted pensively, achieving eye contact that Ranma said I didn't break for the next few minutes, which we spent in silence, "like the sky."

"T-thanks, I guess," he stuttered, smiling. "You hungry?"

And we just sat there for about five minutes. I was gazing at his blue orbs and he was at the edge of his seat while the rest of the class ate their snacks and drank their tetra-packed fruit juices, occasionally glancing at us (and then finally, not taking their eyes off us at all).

"No," I answered at last. "But I love you."

His eyes grew wide in surprise (hah, as if he didn't know that already), but I didn't give him a chance to reply. I planted a nice, babyish one on his lips. One that made a noisy, "Moowah!" sound.

And the paparazzi (okay, the Photographers Club) that once stalked Avery and me started clicking their cameras away, capturing my lip-locking moment with my fiancé. That's the second time this week, because of course they took pictures of the one we had during the Winter Dance.

_Kami-sama_, I am like, drunk, but not on booze. I cannot think straight. Lack of sleep is very, very detrimental, I tell you. I am not doing it again – not sleeping, I mean. I barely had an hour of Zz's this morning. Or maybe it's just because the temp is dropping. It's always nice to sleep during the cold.

But really. Everything is so… light. Like the world's round again, unlike the terrible flatness of misery it was yesterday. All is calm, all is bright, just like that Christmas song. And although there's reason to be sad, the truth has finally sunk in, and there's no use carping about it. It's best to be positive about everything. I know that my mom, Avery, and Ranma would want me to be.

"Tendo, buckets now," I hear Mr. Tetsuo say sternly.

Oh, crud. Didn't hear him call my attention earlier, must have spaced out badly. I can't even sit up straight, now he's making me stand outside the room. With two heavy buckets of water in both hands.

"Do you hear me, Miss Tendo?"

"Yes, I do," I answer quietly. "But can I bring my notebook with me?" _Please say yes, yes, yes, I don't want to waste my time outside without writing on my diary–_

"No," he says altogether. "Your hands wouldn't be free to write."

"Okay," I say without arguing.

* * *

**Friday, Lunch**

Sometimes (_Kami-sama_, frequently, most of the time, all the time) I have the strongest suspicion that my pet P-chan is actually human. He may not have a human body, but he sure thinks like he were a _Homo sapiens_. Like he was an experiment of some mad scientist who operated his head and replaced his brain with a human's. P-chan has… very human emotions, his memory is that of human level, and his actions are _definitely_ human.

Wow, that's one smart piglet I adopted. I am so lucky. He should be on _Oprah_ and Oprah's going to fawn over P-chan's intelligence, along with the other talented pets she invited to guest on her show… maybe Lassie or Garfield, or Gollum. Or Shampoo. Hah.

After forty minutes of carrying my two beloved almost-like-family water buckets outside the classroom, the handles of the buckets started burying themselves deeper into hand. The cold pouring into the window in front of me didn't help, either. The pain in my hand and the sleep-inducing frosty air did nothing to snap me out of my drowsiness.

And I was about to droop and fall completely on the floor when I heard, from below me, a cute little "Bwee."

There was just something about my pet that I couldn't ignore. I just _love_ him down to the last square inch of his black piglet skin. So I snapped out of my sleepiness and smiled. "Ohayou, P-chan!"

"Bwee, bwee!" ("Good morning, too!"?)

He was balancing a small plastic bag on his back.

"I'm sorry you have to catch me in such a pathetic state," I laughed. "I didn't see you yesterday! I missed you so much… how've you been? Where did you go?"

"Bwee… Bwee, bweeeeeeee! Bwee… Bwee! Bwee – bwee – bweeeee…" ("No, that's okay… I missed you too, and I'm really glad to see you! I've been better… but I'm just fine! I went to – you know – nearby places…"?)

"Oh, really? Good for you…" My eyes landed on the small package he was carrying. "Is that for me?"

"Bwee." ("Yes."?)

I furtively looked down the corridors. Nobody was there. I listened closely and the teacher was still yapping away about Genghis Khan and the Mongolians (whose appearance, by the way, strongly inspired the term _mongoloid_, which refers to people with Down's Syndrome. So sad for them).

So I silently put down my buckets and took the package from P-chan's back. It was hot coffee. In a covered plastic cup with a straw. Taken out from a donut shop.

By my pet piglet.

"Bweeee, bwee. Bwee?" ("I went under a bit of trouble to get that, but I got it anyway. Is it good?"?)

I removed the plastic bag and sipped some of the caffeine goodness. "The best," I moaned contentedly, feeling the neurons in my brain and body activating. With my free hand, I scooped up P-chan from the floor and, squealing in affection, kissed his snout. "Thank you!" I cuddled him until I finished drinking all the coffee.

And I don't know what came over me, but I started chitchatting with P-chan just like what we do at home, only in this instance we did it in the corridor (where people who'd see me would most likely conclude me crazy). Like he were a human being. I know, I know, I am making my delusions true by actually doing something about it, but just let me be okay? I was all alone in that corridor, and the birds on the windowsill were… _flighty_. As in double meaning _flighty_. Choose the meaning you like.

"P-chan, I know you and Ranma fight a lot," I started quietly, making sure the class inside wouldn't hear. He let out a fit of angry snorts and snuggled to my chest. "I know that, of course I do. But maybe you should… try to get along. After all, we're… together now… I mean, not just engaged-by-our-parents together, but boyfriend-girlfriend together. I love him, and I love you, and I don't want the both of you to argue all the time because you always end up hurt like boys after a brawl. Or wild boars in the jungle."

(Just like how Ryouga and Ranma argue, actually. If Ryouga met P-chan, they'd hit it off _instantly_!)

He snuggled even closer to me. "Bwee!" ("But he's evil!"?)

"I promise, if you just spend time together, you'll find out he's a good guy. A little immature, but fun. Please, P-chan? For me?"

I looked down at him when he surfaced from my chest. His eyes shone sadly, like he was crying, so I smiled at him to make him feel better. I found out after a long time of being with this piglet that a smile always does wonders to uplift his mood.

"Bwee, bweeee…" ("Okay, for you…"?) Snort, snort. (Sob, sob or sniff, sniff?)

I beamed. "Now that's my P-chan," I said proudly. And then I remembered that I was going to visit Avery after school. "Don't stray away from school, okay? We're going to the hospital to visit Avery later."

"Bwee?" ("That guy?"?)

"Yes. And don't make too much noise in the hospital room with Ranma, okay? Avery needs peace and quiet. He's got… h-he's got– Er, he's frail and he was just operated on. We have to care for him."

"Bweeeeeee, bwee. Bwee… Bwee!" ("I never really hated the guy as much as I did Ranma, even though he hanged out with you lots of times. He seemed like a nice person… Okay, let's go visit him!"?)

And just after I finished my coffee, put P-chan down, and resumed in carrying my darling buckets of water, Mr. Tetsuo poked his head out of the door and said that I could come in already because third period was almost ending.

I swear, even his timing was perfect. Everything's perfect this morning (well, except for the fact that I was four fifths asleep when I came to school, but P-chan fixed that). When World History ended, everybody in class waited for the next subject teacher to arrive. And Ranma walked over to my seat and massaged my hands.

So now, I am enjoying my lunch of Kasumi's shanghai fried rice, sitting in front of Ranma who's eating the same thing, listening to the class talk about last night's scandalous airing of _Wife Swap_ and the new episode of _The OC_, breathing in the cold, revitalizing December air (no, I am still not giving up on the fact that the air's got carbon monoxide which can disrupt bodily functions, but hey. It's cool air nonetheless), watching Sayuri and Yuka eat with Hiroshi and Daisuke. And Avery's entering the door.

OMG AVERY JUST ENTERED THE DOOR! _WHAT THE HECK IS HE DOING HERE?_ I AM GOING TO _KILL_ HIM, HE'S NOT SUPPOSED TO STRAIN HIMSE–

* * *

**Friday, dismissal time**

HOMEWORK (Thank heavens for Yuka who is waiting for me to finish copying this from her notebook)

Math: z-scores and inverse functions, short quiz Monday

English: transitional devices, study in advance: modals

World History: book report on Genghis Khan (Great. Just great.)

Japanese: none

Science: molarity and molality, p.109-113

Study Period: fill in study chart and affix parents' signatures on the bottom

Physical Education: get ready for New Year Marathon!

* * *

**Friday night**

The first thing I did was whack him on the head with the rolled-up paper I used for calligraphy during Japanese period (note: I would have used my mallet under normal circumstances, really, but I couldn't do that to Avery). Then I had to endure the piercing glares of my girl classmates, who demanded me to apologize and bow at Avery's feet for having whacked him with said paper (snap, click, snap, click go the Photographers Club). I let myself be dragged by Ranma and Avery outside the classroom, where we sealed my female assailants in from further damaging what's left of my hearing ability. Oh, and then I whacked Avery on the head again with my calligraphy paper.

"_What_ are you doing here?" I hissed, taking in the sight of him in the school uniform, a sight that I haven't seen for a while. "You're supposed to be resting right now! Your wound! Your health!"

Avery pouted, his verdant eyes gleaming with a playful, I'm-a-kid-and-I-lost-everything-I-had-in-a-fire-so-will-you-please-feed-and-adopt-me look. If I didn't know him, it would have worked on me. But haha, I did. I knew him. So for the third time, I whacked him on the head. Never mind that he has cancer and there's a waterfall of blood ready to ooze out of his chest the moment his wound accidentally opens. "Am I not allowed to go to school anymore just because I'm (fake sniff)… unwell?" he joked. "And is whacking me on the head with that thing the right way to treat a suffering person? I thought you wanted to take care of me… I'll tell Anthony…" he joked again.

A joke. No, not just one. He's ill and he can still tell jokes about it. And since Ranma laughed with him, I whacked Ranma on the head, too.

"Will you two just shut it? This isn't a laughing matter!" I turned to Avery and fixed my eyes to his. "You, Avery Hanabishi, are stubborn and insubordinate. What if something happens to you here in school? What if you collapse? Well, sure, there's the clinic, but what if your incision opens and you bleed to death? They don't have surgeons here, you know! You'll end up a dried-up radish in this very corridor…"

He stopped laughing, but on his lips remained a small, significant smile. "See?" he began perceptively. "Now you're treating me differently because I'm _fragile_."

I remembered him saying the same thing at the hospital, and I said "I never would have" yesterday.

My temper abated and my expression softened as my eyes traveled over the smooth skin on his face. "But… you're pale."

Avery chuckled. "When have I been tanned? Besides, I'm only a little paler than I used to be. I'm fine."

Damn, the pressure building up inside of me was so great, it's a big question why I didn't break down crying. "But still!" I argued. "I-I'm just… really worried. If something happens to you, I'll panic, and Ranma would have to whack me on the head to bring me back to composure, and then Anthony's going to call me a Maggot!"

Could I have said something stupider?

At first Avery and Ranma froze, looking at me as if I were an alien, and then they laughed. At me.

Avery's hand landed on top of my head. "I know you're worried," he explained thoughtfully. "Everybody is. But Akane, please just… don't worry _too much_. I know where I stand, I know my limits and I know what I'm doing. True, this may be stubborn, what I'm doing right now… but if you were in my place, you wouldn't want to spend all your time inside a hospital room, would you?"

His words didn't register until five seconds later, so before that, I sort of argued pointlessly. "But–"

There. The five-second mark was reached, and Avery drew me close in an embrace (he smelled of mint). That's when what he said registered in my brain. When I felt how tight his hug was, when I felt that he wasn't at all weak.

Then he let go and smiled at me. "See? I'm fine. I'm sixteen, I'm a man, and I can take care of myself. Besides, the wound's fully closed already, so we don't have to worry about that. I ate a lot this morning, and Niles prepared a whole turkey for me for lunch, so I'm good and full. And no, Ton-ton's not going to call you a Maggot. He'll call _me_ that. And when that moment comes this afternoon when he picks me up, I want you to whack him on the head with that thing," he said amusedly, pointing at my rolled-up, almost crumpled paper, "and bid me a happy goodbye as I get eaten by the jaws of the great black shark where I have to sit beside my brother for the next half hour. Okay?"

"Uhm, okay…" was what I said as a smart reply.

"Not convinced yet?" Avery asked. He faced Ranma and stood straight. "Do I look weak, Mr. Saotome? Do I look like I am in need of too much tender loving care? Do you think I should go back to the hospital and turn myself in for the rest of the week?"

Ranma raised his eyebrow and pursed his lips, looking like he's thinking hard about it.

"A little scrawny in the arms, but you're good."

"Ah," Avery sighed knowingly. "My arms always don't get exercise… Taekwondo focuses on the legs, after all…"

Of course, Ranma already knew that Avery does Taekwondo, since it was the reason why he bellowed that he was jealous, right in the middle of lecture once upon a December day. But this time he seemed very interested. "So how good are you, Avery?"

The brown-haired embodiment of stubbornness grinned. "Black belt, first class," he proclaimed proudly. "Hey, Akane once told me that you do martial arts, too. What kind? And are you as good as she says you are?"

Ranma looked at me and winked, hence I blushed. "Oh, Anything Goes. And good?" He trailed off, chuckling.

"Wow," Avery said, amazed. "Mind if you show me some moves? I'm interested in the unusual arts… Karate and Taekwondo actually bore me. Muai Thai's cool too, but it's just tedious."

"Sure!" Ranma immediately agreed. He turned to me. "Avery and I are going to the field and–" He stopped, seeing my eyebrows meet at the center. "No, don't worry, Akane, we ain't sparring! We're just going to show our moves and all that. You can come with us, if you want."

"N-no, thanks."

"Then we'll be back before the bell rings for science period!" Ranma assured.

Before I could even open my mouth, Avery had said, "Don't worry, I won't strain myself, I promise. I promise in the name of… the tumor the doctors got out of me."

"Avery!"

He laughed. "Okay, okay! I promise in the name of Niles and his turkey. And would I even lie to you? No. So trust me on this."

"Fine. Take care, both of you. Ranma, make sure Avery doesn't hurt himself…"

"Yes, _Mom_," my pigtailed fiancé joked, and immediately added "Off we go now, Avery!" before I could lift the rolled-up paper and whack him again.

"Yes, indeed! Akane, I promise to keep my promise!"

Avery had already walked away a few feet, but Ranma stayed behind for a second to sneak a kiss on my cheek. "You're a sweetheart, Akane," he whispered, making me weak in the knees. Then he caught up with Avery, and the last thing I heard were words about masters and chi and things that I didn't know those two shared in common. The last time they met was in the memorial park, and they didn't even talk to each other. Now they're acting like they've been friends since birth!

And if that's not enough to rattle me, the door behind me (yes, the door that kept the wild girls inside from sinking their teeth into Avery's flesh) slammed open. The screaming members of the Ranma Fans Club and the Avery Fans Club ran over me and my poor body as they chased my darling boys towards the field.

Am I just being too much of a MOM? A _stage_ MOM? To Avery? Was Ranma's joke the truth? That I was a… I was a MOM? Really, I was just worried about him! It's a good thing nothing happened to him at lunch time, although when he and Ranma came back (before the bell rang for science, just as Ranma had promised) they were sweaty and had red spots on their forehead, and Avery looked drained. I know that Ranma's a ball of energy, and it seems like the Avery a few months ago very well could have been one, too. But now he's not well, and he should take care of himself! Those two boys are just like… ugh! And I'm like…

Their mom.

It had sunken in. I cannot find any other adjective that suits the way I acted. I am so hopeless.

* * *

**Saturday, December 11, 1 pm**

Believe it or not, I just woke up. I woke up at one in the afternoon. I guess the coffee boost yesterday made me loose more sleep.

And P-chan's been staring at me, at think. Maybe he woke up at… er, maybe 8 in the morning, and he's been staring at me ever since. Like right now. He's beside me on my bed, his eyes unblinking.

Okay, that kind of freaks me out. But the whole shiny-glazed look is so cute.

I just kissed his forehead.

I am not hungry. 18 hours have passed since my last meal, and I am still not hungry.

I'm too tired to think. I'll sleep the whole afternoon through.

* * *

**Sunday, December 12, 8 am**

KAMI-SAMA, I REALLY DID SLEEP THE WHOLE AFTERNOON THROUGH! AND THE EVENING!

And I am famished, and P-chan isn't beside me anymore, and I feel so cold, and my tongue feels weird, and my hair is a blob of grease.

I need to take a bath! I can't let anybody see me like this! I can't let Ranma see me looking like a bride from hell! Aaaaaagh!

Ouch, bumped my head on the wall. Even the wall whacked me. And it's inanimate.

* * *

**Sunday, 10:30 am, my room**

The hot bath did me good. So good. And why, you ask?

Because the moment I submerged myself under the warm waters of tub (which has withstood the wear and tear caused by constant villain attacks, violent Ranma-Genma arguments, and untargeted mallet strikes. I've got to advertise this kind of tub to everyone) and its refreshing eucalyptus mint bubble bath soap and citrus bath oils, it dawned unto me:

I _was_ being a _mom_. I was so silly for being overprotective of Avery. I know I'm not his mom, but even from a friend level, that was a very weirdly caring thing I did. I don't even call it _caring_ anymore, it's more of… underestimating.

And if Avery ever realizes it, which, I'm sure he has, with him being smart and a martial artist and all… oh, it's a bad thing.

I am so sure that it's the lack of sleep that caused me to act as such. I'm personally sorry for having acted that way, really. That was really something stupid of me to do – because even though Avery was not in a very good state, what I did just… degraded him to something worse. Every man has his pride, and I just crushed his by treating him like a baby!

Haha, I just realized: If medieval-Ranma were in Avery's place last Friday, then he would have shouted at me at least ten times to "Quit fussin' over me, tomboy!" Then I would have whacked him hard on the head with my mallet so he would "Quit calling me tomboy, you fuss!"

Now that's an amusing, nostalgic picture!

I can hear the female Ranma shrieking outside in the yard. And Ryouga's voice sounds mad.

There go the clowns. _I'd like to be in their numbers, when the clowns go marching in!_ Honestly, those two guys, no matter how serious their argument may seem to be, I think it's just over some… I dunno, sandwich, or something. Well, that _was_ the reason why Ryouga chased Ranma halfway around the globe… I'm not sure if a sandwich (or worse, maybe a little breadstick) is still the reason they've been fighting after their first match here in Nerima, but nobody wants to tell me anyway, even Nabiki who surely knows all about it since she knows even the very whereabouts of hell itself. So I assume it's always over a sandwich (hmm… is it turkey or bacon?).

Hey, the phone's ringing outside my room.

Okay, 5 rings already. Kasumi should've answered it by now.

Oh, there. If it's not for me, she'll go downstairs since I'm the only person on the second floor right now. If it's for me, then–

Kasumi knocks.

* * *

**Sunday, 12 nn, porch, pigging out on Kasumi's rice cakes**

Fate had me there, she really did. The phone call was for me, from Avery. And he apologized to me.

"Hello, Akane," he started. "I'm sorry for what I did last Friday."

"What did you do last Friday?"

"W-well," he stuttered, "I knew you were concerned for me but I… shooed your concern away. That was something rude I did. I know that you care about me, and that you're worried about me, and–"

"No, _I'm_ sorry," I interrupted.

"P-pardon?" his voice stuttered over the phone.

"I'm sorry," I repeated. "Ranma was right, I _was_ being a MOM. I didn't trust your capacity to… to do things yourself just because of your… condition. I guess the instinct just kicked in; even though Kasumi's the mother of the dojo right now, I'm fussier when people get hurt. If I were a cat, then I'd have been licking Ranma's wounds until my tongue dried out." I stopped and blushed inwardly. "Oh, I didn't mean anything by that!" I gasped, more to myself. I censured myself and resumed my apology. "The point is, I care for you too much that I've been ignoring the fact that maybe you don't want me to be anxious about you, and doing so would just… annoy you, so–"

"Whoah, hold your horses!" he hastily protested. "I wasn't annoyed _at all_. In fact, _annoyed_ is far from how I feel! Akane, I was overwhelmed and touched with what you did because… well, nobody's ever cared for me that way before. If my parents did, then it's all a distant memory. And Ton-ton's not really… uh, the motherly kind. So it's you, and only you, Akane, and I appreciate that tremendously! But looking on both sides of the case, maybe you were a little… er…"

"Too mommish," I supplied dejectedly.

"Well, maybe not _mommish_, I'm not even sure if there exists such a word," he laughed softly. "Maybe… fretful's the term. Remember what I said? You should live life to the fullest. You can't do that if you fret all the time, you know, may it be about yourself or others."

So he was more concerned about _my_ welfare than his? Wait, where in this conversation did that turn happen? What was going on? I wasn't the one who had cancer! Avery's so… SELFLESS! I can't bear it anymore… he doesn't belong here on this planet full of violence and evil and corruption. He belongs to Mars with the nice Martians who draw pretty crop circles…

"O-kaaay…" I breathed, wondering frantically how Avery could be so perfect since Nabiki once said that nobody is ever perfect. And Nabiki's practically a walking oracle.

"So don't fret too much, okay?" he said, his voice so trusting and expectant and graceful. "Treat me like a normal person… like the Avery you knew before you came to the hospital. Promise?"

"P-promise."

I heard him exhale and credibly imagined an Avery-smile on his face. Then he chuckled. "Did Ranma tell you how much fun we had?"

I gathered my thoughts and my mood became brighter. "Yes, s'matter of fact, he did! He totally enjoyed sharing moves with you and he said that he's looking forward to getting to know you more. You two are getting along with each other so nicely! It makes me so happy…"

Now that was the bright side I failed to realize. As Avery narrated more extensively the new moves he learned from Ranma, and what he showed my fiancé in return, the bright side turned even brighter, until my mood became the opposite of what I felt at the beginning of the phone call.

We both burst out in laughter when he told me that they accidentally bumped foreheads with each other when he tried to follow what Ranma was doing in his kata.

"That was very clumsy of me!" he laughed.

"Yes, that absolutely was," I agreed teasingly. "So that explains the red mark on your foreheads when you entered the classroom! And given the fact that Ranma's skull is as hard as metal, then your red mark must have turned into a nasty bump you're nursing at this very moment…"

"You should work in those psychic hotlines, you know."

"Just using my sense of logic, smarty pants," I giggled.

Then I heard a vague voice somewhere in the background. Avery groaned and said, "Excuse me, Ton-ton's having a fit…"

"_I am not having a fit, Maggot, and stop calling me Ton-ton,"_ Anthony's voice retorted calmly, the fact that I can hear him clearly signifying that he's already only a few feet away from his brother.

"Okay, okay, so you're not having a fit. What are you fussing about?"

"I am not fussing," Anthony coolly said. "I am merely asking for paper."

Avery and I choked on air at the same time. "You're asking me for paper?" a flabbergasted Avery asked.

"Yes. Twenty letter size sheets. And what in the name of heaven happened to your forehead?"

"You, Anthony Hanabishi, the president of multi-million dollar companies and owner of hotel chains and acres of productive land, are asking me, your little brother, for paper?" Avery asked, ignoring his brother's remark about the bump.

"Yes," the older Hanabishi repeated. "I have run out of it. Unfortunately, I do not know how to make my own as it is a long and tiring process. And may I remind you that since our parents divided all Hanabishi properties between the two of us, then you, too, are 'the president of multi-million dollar companies and owner of hotel chains and acres of productive land' in the same way, only you are paying someone else to do that for you now because of your juvenile status."

Avery seemed to have stopped breathing (well, his mouth was just over the mouthpiece, and his every inhale and exhale earlier could be heard in my receiver). "Don't you have your _own_ paper?" he asked, this time sounding… a little goaded, but bowled over nevertheless. "You use it all the time for… you know, _paperwork_. Since you actually do that every second of your life?"

"Now _you_ are the one who is having a fit. I told you already that I have run out of it," Anthony explained, his voice void of expression. "And I only need twenty sheets. Surely you can spare your brother some paper."

The sound of fingernails on the scalp told me that Avery was scratching his head. "Can't you just ask Niles to buy it?"

"I need the paper now, and Niles is busy finishing up what is left of the turkey you did not eat."

"Oh. But I'm sorry, Ton, I only have exactly twenty sheets left and I need them all for a book report on Genghis Khan."

Anthony scoffed. "I am sure you are not required to pass it _now_ for it is a Sunday."

"But I've started doing the book report yesterday," Avery explained, "and I'll print it soon."

A period of silence hovered around the two, and I listened closely on the other end of the phone that I was holding tightly, wondering why everything was so quiet. I thought the line had been cut by some random interference.

Until I heard Avery gasp – a really audible gasp – and bellow "Give that back to me!"

There was a noise of someone hurriedly stepping away from the spot. "Are you troubled that I am going to do something to this darling photograph you have of Miss Tendo, Maggot? Do not worry, if you just give me paper then I will not do something odious your piteous cancer cannot take."

Avery gasped. I gasped. Anthony laughed (and that was the first time I heard him do that) a deep, placid laugh. _Kami_, Anthony Hanabishi did it! He stole my picture from Avery's journal and was holding it hostage until Avery gave him some paper!

"Do give me a moment, Akane, will you?" Avery muttered to the mouthpiece, his voice becoming sweet all of a sudden.

There was a _click_ that signified Avery had put the phone down on a table but did not hang up. And then there was a grunt followed by the loud and rapid sound of footfalls; Avery was shouting at his brother ("I'll kick your head off!"), Anthony was laughing at him ("Taekwondo is an abysmal match for Shaolin!"). Their voices rose and fell from my auditory perspective, and so did the plodding of their feet, which meant that Anthony was being chased by his brother in a rather large room.

It was so suspenseful, I swear. My grip on the phone was very taut that it's a wonder why it didn't break into little pieces. At first I was worried that Avery would injure himself in his delicate state, but about three minutes passed and they were still running around the room (Anthony's laughter was becoming louder and louder after each lap around the racing course, and so were Avery's yells of "Give that back you oversized dog!"). I got kind of bored so I began tapping my free index finger to my chin.

And then there was a riotous crash that made me jump – one that clearly happened just beside (or most likely _to_) their telephone – and a big bang of someone violently hitting his body on a hard surface (which was, I strongly infer, the side table where the telephone sat on). I think their phone was murdered, and I quickly removed the phone from my ear as very deafening _BANG BOOOOM_ sounds dominated my ears, and then a "GAAAAAAAH!" When I listened again half a minute later, the dial tone said hello.

Okay. What just happened? Anthony and Avery Hanabishi, the most prominent, calm and behaved people I know, just chased each other around a room because of paper and a picture (of me, by the way, so… _gulp_)! WHAT WAS THAT? Do they mess with each other like that all the time, like… like Ranma and Ryouga do, like wild boars in the jungle?

Wow, that's one violent life. They _live together_.

Whoops, just yawned while my mouth is full. Better do my Genghis Khan report now…

* * *

**Sunday, 10 pm, my room**

What a miracle, Ranma did his report by himself! Right after dinner, the both of us proceeded here to do the rest of our studying, and I was so surprised when he held out his finished report – all seven pages of it – for me to proofread. OMG. Ranma actually did it by himself. He did.

And I was so proud of him that the whole time we were studying, I had this smile on my face. He kept asking me about it, but I didn't tell. The reasons, of course, are: the funny thing that happened between the Hanabishi brothers earlier today and Ranma's being "determined and studious." And he told me that he and Ryouga actually talked today (I don't really know… maybe he was referring to the fight he had with Ryouga this morning… but then again, who knows?). Things are so great, thank heavens so, so, soooo much!

Although Ranma did keep his hips away from me the whole night, which was full of… you know. Insert giggle here. Hah, goodnight. If the boogeyman ever sets his sight on me and touches me, he'll end up in a crate in the Sahara.

Gosh, not sure where that came from, but goodnight anyway.

* * *

**Monday, December 13, Math**

Avery actually waited with a smile for Ranma and me by the gates this morning. The three of us pruned Kuno and his Hentai Horde (complete attendance, as always) no matter how I protested at first that Avery wasn't supposed to be included in the battle because he might strain himself. Okay, so I told myself not to be a MOM, but what I did a while ago was so _not_ mommish. Those hentais were actually sort of dangerous in a weird way, and Avery ended up with a small gash on his lower lip unlike the first time he fought with them with only his legs and he came out unscathed.

"Oh, c'mon, Akane," Ranma explained, drawing me close by the waist, "it was just a morning exercise. Right, Avery?"

"Morning exercise, yeah," Avery agreed distantly, wiping his lip with his hanky. He looked a little upset – and I think I know why: turns out, Anthony won in their battle yesterday (but with the racket and the violent noise and the fact that Anthony is a twenty-something six-footer, it's a wonder why Avery was unharmed), and little Hanabishi was the one who had to buy more paper. The whole thing got him distracted this morning, so maybe that's the reason why he took a strike to his lip. Perhaps, like Ranma, he was the kind who didn't want to lose in any rivalry.

Geez, these two have a LOT in common than I thought!

Anyway, I'm going Christmas shopping with Sayuri and Yuka later. Of course, Ranma and Avery wouldn't be accompanying us, since I'm buying their gifts. I already have a gift list; I just hope I could find everything that's in it!

* * *

**Monday night, porch across half-frozen koi pond, inside my very own furcoat**

Wow, the spirit of Christmas totally emerged today. Just as I expected, the students at school didn't pay much attention to the lessons because they all wanted to go shopping! Some of them finished over the weekend, but most of them had put it off until they saw the first signs of snow just this morning. I know that it's waaaaaay late this year because it should have started weeks ago, and I am so sure it has everything to do with global warming, but at least it still snowed! Rejoice, for technology hasn't damaged the world completely… yet.

When Ranma and I went home, we were both huddled together. It's sending sweet shivers up my spine, how close we were the whole time… his arm was over my shoulders and securing me to him while I hugged his firm waist. Whenever he spoke, his hot breath on my face made me feel warm despite the biting cold around us. His body felt so nice and gratifying next to me.

And yes, I have successfully bought every single thing on my gift list (except for two, though)! Sayuri, Yuka and I went shopping after school. We also bumped into Ukyou who was being stalked by Santa Claus (who is, of course, just Tsubasa in another one of her scandalous disguises). I am all set for Christmas, I can feel it. When the snow completely covers the ground like one thick coat of cold fur, everybody's going to seek warmth, and they're going to stick together in the name of love and affection. It's wonderful!

Poor carp, though. Dad transferred them to an aquarium inside the house, otherwise they'd freeze to death in the pond. I could almost imagine them in all their golden red and orange glory being defrosted by Kasumi right after winter. And then the family wouldn't even know they're enjoying carp stew. Oh, crud, no… thank goodness Kasumi's not that kind of person.

I'm worried about Avery. No, not in a mommish way again, but as a friend. He seemed awfully distracted the whole day that he didn't even notice his fans club fuss over his lip. His emerald eyes focused distantly outside the window of the classroom, and he looked more… moony than the usual. His skin was an alarming shade of white, his lips were almost the same color with his face, and his eyes looked sunken. Maybe it was the… the cancer taking effect. Or maybe it's the cold! It could be anything, Akane! But even though he did cheer up during dismissal time when he waved goodbye to Ranma and me before going into his limousine, I knew that he was feeling weaker and weaker by the minute. Oh goodness, the thought drains all the happiness from me…

Now, inside the white fur overcoat (which makes me pine for Ranma right now) Avery gave me, sipping some hot chocolate that Kasumi prepared, I am hoping he's sitting comfortably on a soft rug (complete with pillows and plush stuff) in front of his fireplace, enjoying his favorite warm drink and bathing in the warmth the fire was giving off. Oh, and the image of Anthony massaging his feet makes the scene better, too.

Brrr… the snow's being bolder by the second! The flakes are flying everywhere, and I'm shivering a little. That's with the fur coat and the hot chocolate.

Hey, Ranma just entered the dining room! Heard his footsteps even before he reached the first floor. He wrapped himself up with a woolen blanket, and now he's smiling at me. A whack on the head would erase that silly smile, I'm so sure… but I'd rather not do it. That would destroy the moment…

* * *

**Monday night, my room, squealing with every fluffy, sugary emotion existing**

"How's my favorite tomboy?" he greeted, taking a seat to my left.

"_Baka_," I muttered, playfully whacking his head. "_Bakabakabakabakabaka_."

We fumbled and scuffled with each other awhile, giggling the whole time until he stopped me from further shaking his brain cells by stretching his arm around my shoulders.

"You feel so good," he moaned in my ear, holding me tighter.

I puzzled. "That's the overcoat, idiot," I shot sarcastically, a generous amount of fog coming out of my mouth. In actuality, I was loving his musky scent. So very… manly… even though he didn't know he smelled like that.

He bought time to think, and then he looked at me. "No, I believe it's you," he said with a smile.

I blushed and focused on the pond, whose edges were very much frozen already. Just when I was too caught up in remembering the relationship of the freezing point of a substance to its volatility (I am afraid I was bombarded with too much chemistry for the past lessons. That doesn't make me a nerd, though, I clearly insist), I heard Ranma laugh quietly.

"I never fail to make you blush. Always like that, huh? You're the most vulnerable person I know when it comes to mush and wush."

"Am I really?" I asked vaguely, eyeing the snow that gently fell to the ground.

The truth is, of course, that I remember all – and I mean ALL – the things Ranma did to me for the past several months that made me turn into shades that range from sunset pink to beet red to… eggplant purple. And when he's the assaulter, then I _am_ 'the most vulnerable person there is when it comes to mush and wush'. Whether his assault is something completely intentional, or something unintended – which usually portrays him as a stuttering kid who is not used to affection and blurting out words sweet enough to decay anybody's teeth – he never fails to flush all the red out of me, even if the blush precedes (or is proceeded by) a vicious scream of "HENTAIII!" or "Ranma no BAKAAA!"

He chuckled, and it was followed by a slight shiver.

"Ranma, you're cold," I said concernedly, pointing out that what protected him from the temperature was a single layer of wool.

"Of course I'm cold, everybody in Japan is and that's obvious," he indicated. "Ain't actually a warm summer night, so don't lose hair about it."

Not wanting to be called _Mom_ again by my own fiancé, I zipped my mouth.

"You're awfully quiet," he said openly after a few minutes. "That's weird. Until now, I thought talking was your favorite hobby."

"And you've been a silent angel all your life, darling," I snorted.

"Hey stop that, Judge, I'm innocent!"

"Did you know that in Timbuktu, guilty prisoners aren't allowed to cut their hair? The men usually just let it grow and tie it into a… pigtail."

"W-what?"

"Yeah, they do. And did you know," I went on, taking a deep breath and enjoying myself, "that the moment a prisoner is released, he is given one last punishment to make sure he doesn't do the crime again? Instead of being allowed to go to the barbershop for his first haircut in years, the police let a CAT do the cutting. No, make that _eating_. They make the cat eat the pigtail, because cats in Timbuktu just LOVE pigtails. There had been hairball issues because getting hairballs has been a cause of cat deaths, but the police never worry about that since the prison is right beside the cat pound. Now isn't that just convenient?"

No reply. I looked at Ranma and he was a pale shade of purple. He had his head down, so I couldn't see his eyes because his bangs covered them.

Wow, he fainted with that false trivia of mine!

"Ranma?" I called. "Ranma wake up, sky's falling." I nudged him with my shoulder. "Ranma!"

No? That left me no other choice.

"Ranma, I had a one night stand with Kuno and now I'm pregnant."

I suppressed a grin that threatened to split across my face as his head snapped up.

"WHAAAT?"

"Oh, yes, Ranma," I continued, covering my face with both hands to reinforce the crying effect. "That was very… very _mean_ of him to take advantage of me like that… I feel so used and… and _sore_!"

His mind obviously disorganized and his façade becoming terribly hysterical, he put both his hands on my shoulders and shook me. "Tell me that's not true! Tell me!"

I removed my hands from my face and answered him with a victorious smile that held the all the sweetness of honey and the ridiculing sting of a rebellious killer bee.

"Y-YOU!" he accused, flabbergasted. "You queen of all evil you! Scheming, cunning, merciless root of all wickedness! You were the one who went chillin' and killin' Annabel Lee! You made the Jusenkyo springs! You invented calculus! And you… YOU were the matchmaker who got together Happosai's parents!"

I mischievously nodded in sheer agreement. "I am none other than Akane Tendo. And we haven't even taken up calculus yet, stupid."

"_Kami-sama_, you scared me to death," he panted, clutching his chest. "K-Kuno! Pregnant! T-take _advantage_! What in the name of hell were you _thinking_?"

I laughed. "You fainted so I woke you up."

"With the news that you're pregnant with Kuno's baby? You could have killed me on the spot, _baka_!"

"Otherwise you wouldn't have at least blinked to indicate you were still alive!" I explained, laughing with my heart's content. "Don't go screaming like Kodachi and losing your nuts and bolts about it." Goodness, he looked as pale as Avery.

"But… but you and Kuno… and b-baby… one night stand… S-SORE!" he stuttered incoherently, his eyes showing bewilderment and anxiety and disbelief and… well, all synonyms of the previously mentioned.

"Yes, baby, Kuno must feel so sore now, too…"

"GAAAACK!"

I nearly rolled over in laughter. I've never seen Ranma so… so like that!

"Stop it," he pleaded, covering his ears, "Akane, stop it! You're _killing_ me…"

My laughter faded as I observed him. His eyes were tightly shut, and he really did look so scared… like a little kid trapped inside a dark closet with a freaky doll that looks horribly like _Chuckie_…

"Hey there, kiddo," I whispered gently, holding his hands. I slowly removed them from his ears and held them down, but they balled up into uptight fists. His eyes were still closely shut (and for a second I fought the urge to laugh at him again because this Ranma was faaaaaaaar from the strong, manly, brave, abrasive Ranma that I knew), his brows furrowed. "You know very well I wouldn't do a thing like that with _Kuno_. And all hell will break lose upon his disturbed soul before he could ever take advantage of _me_."

I smiled and leaned closer to kiss him. I felt his hands loosen up below mine as he opened his eyes.

"Ranma. I'm not having anybody else's baby. That was just a joke, I'm sorry."

Clearly, he was still shaken by said joke, but he tried his best to look manly and take back the testosterone he had lost a while ago. "Just… just don't do that again, okay? You could give Happosai a run for his panties, ya know that?"

I giggled.

He smiled at me with a chastising look. Then I saw in his eyes the familiar sight of realization.

"What did you mean by… you're not having… anybody else's baby?"

I gasped, blushing, realizing what I had said. Why on earth did I happen to say that?

"I-I… have no idea."

"Whose baby are you having in the first place?" he asked innocently.

Gosh, those babies in the hospital have their own way of engraving their scream-y, newborn, watch-out-world-here-I-come bawling into people's minds.

"Dunno… yours?" I supplied meekly. And then I gasped. Goodness, if the tomatoes had seen how my blush intensified, then they'd immediately resign from the Tomato Company!

I focused on my hands that were still holding his, but I'm pretty sure he was blushing, too.

"Wow, that's… that's _something_," he breathed, a bit shaken. "That's really _something_."

Hurriedly, I looked at him. "Geez, I'm sorry, I shouldn't ha–"

"There's… there's snow on your nose," he interrupted my rush apology in a whisper as he lightly brushed his thumb over the tip of my nose.

Then he encompassed me in the warmest and sweetest of all embraces. We gazed at the pond and the dark, frosty sky and didn't mention a word about Kuno or cats anymore. I just sat there in his arms, taking pleasure in his presence.

But he was much happier for the rest of the night, the reason of which I have a justifiable, rational, tingle-inducing, heart-fattening, squeal-making idea. And that made me much, much happier, too – happier than the carp inside Dad's aquarium now that they're safe from being Kasumi's next culinary specialty the moment Spring comes rushing in like… well, like the way it always does in that comfy, sunny, flowery, feel-good way.

* * *

**Author's Notes:** New term here, people: mommish, Avery and Akane's term whose meaning borders on "fussy" to "excessively motherly". And as you can see, Ranma and Akane are very, _very_ comfortable with each other now, and that makes the world a better place. ;) That would also leave lots and lots of room for WAFF and other equally, if not more, lovely scenes. Lo and behold, the Akane you see now is far from the brooding-darkness-in-her-heart Akane in the earlier chapters! See? She did lighten up. One more thing: the only person who can break through Avery's barrier of calmness and composure is, of course, his very own brother. Anybody who has a sibling knows that. Avery may not be perfect, after all… haha! (",)

I hope this one didn't sadden you like what the previous chapter did… because in order for Christmas to be merry, I have to let go of the depressing words completely. And that's what I did for this chapter. Okay, maybe not completely, since there were still some emotional thoughts from Akane, but it's generally light, right? Avery and Ranma being buddies is adorable, don't you agree? And so are Avery and Anthony when they bicker like kids (Avery's yell of "Give that back you oversized dog!" was, of course, a pun regarding Anthony's startling resemblance to Sesshoumaru)! Ah, this entertainment is good.

Merry Christmas from da Duke! ;)

* * *

celestial lelila: First of all, thanks for indicating that you gave that nameless review! (",) I totally agree with you. "the fact that avery is too perfect makes him wrong for akane and all her flaws is a very true sentiment. i've always felt that about akane and ranma both being so flawed that their flaws compliment each other and make them perfect for each other." You, my friend, saw that message in between those many lines of melancholy, and I give you props for that! And hurrah, you're the first reviewer to actually say you liked Anthony because you liked Sesshoumaru! Props! What you said about Anthony and Avery being the perfect compliment to each other is totally true, because having the same personality as your brother would just tip the scales to one side, and that ain't fun. Thank you for empathizing with me when I said that a person like Avery didn't deserve his fate, because that's a universal truth that many people take for granted. And whoah! Avery doesn't have to die, does he? ;) Thanks for reviewing, and thanks too for condoling. I really appreciate it. I hope your holidays were as grand as mine! ;)

Ikerana: Weee, thank you for the praise and for keeping in touch with your emotional self when you read this! I know that to be fully touched by this chapter and feel the emotions in it would be a very hard thing to do if one just skimmed over it, which meant that you read this (miserable, sad and depressing) chapter thoroughly. God, that must've been about 10-15 minutes of sadness, I'm sorry! I hope chapter 9 made up for it. Thank you so, so much for the praise! (",)

RiaSternchen: No problem, I always see to it that I reply to your reviews! And whew, finally somebody noticed the larger roles that Sayuri and Yuka play in this fic. I figured that since this one's Akane-centric, then I should put the girls in. Otherwise, she'd appear like a confused teenager swimming alone in angst, her own humor and crazy assumptions. Girlfriends always help. Yep, see ya! ;)

Lou: Awwww, your review really, really, REALLY touched me. So, so, so much. It's actually one of the main inspirations I had when I was making chapter 9. (",) I'm sorry about the "friend" that you dumped, I'm sorry that both of you had to go through so much pain and trouble. But looking at the bright side, I'm glad that you related with chapter 8, that it touched and moved you. I feel like a much better writer already hehe, now that I know I didn't only amuse my readers but touched them as well. And wow, "Avery seems to be the perfect friend - and is the only original character I've ever, ever seen who was actually interesting. It was as if I'd want to see him in the anime!" Thank you! I just made Avery up and I didn't think the people would actually like him much. Appears I was wrong. ;) Thanks for condoling about Klarence; I know we both relate to the feeling of losing a friend. And bah, let the thief do her bidding; when judgment day comes, I wouldn't really care about that. And thanks, you say? No, thank YOU. ;)

Story Weaver1: I've gotta admit, the Kuno&Nabiki scenes were actually a breeze to write. LOL. But a little gross too, I guess, when I look at it from a different perspective. Haha! And beautifully tragic it is, thank you so much!

kenshinlover2002: Thanks, as usual, for reviewing! I will update, just like I always do. The next chapter will be even better, I promise. (",)

alanna28: Hehe, glad you found the baby portion funny ;) Thanks, too, and I hope your Christmas was as merry as mine.

The-Shadow002: I totally agree with you on plagiarism, it's such a horrid thing! Thanks for condoling. And yeah, I went over the chapter again and I DID see some grammar and spelling errors, thanks for pointing out! I fixed them and reposted this chapter. (",) Gah, I loved the humor in the walnut part, too. Yeah, I DO feel that the speedometer for the chapter was irregular, maybe I was feeling a bit rushed when I shouldn't have… well, I have my bad days. I sort of just bumbled off at the ending when Ranma and Akane were outside the house, and I agree with you when you said it was slightly abrupt. Thank you, as always, for reviewing, and don't worry about the bastards. They're… well, they're _bastards_, and it's best we leave them alone to do their own bastardly deeds. ;)


	10. Dealing With Attention

**Author's Notes:** I know I have a lot of explaining to do. I'm sorry. But there you have it anyway, so I'm pretty sure all is forgiven… right? Eeek.

Disclaimer: So I've been writing for quite a long time now. I know that, too.

Ooooo

**The Diary Of Akane Tendo**

**Chapter Ten: Dealing with Attention  
**

**Tuesday, December 14, English**

He threatened to sue. He was fuming when he held out an arm in front of me, saying that I should just watch him this time. He said that even though it wasn't mainly their fault, he just wanted to beat the Furinkan High Hentai Horde because they're so stubborn and annoying. He almost killed Kuno because the poor senior was so loud that he became the main recipient of anger and primary punching bag out of the three hundred guys who welcomed us at the gates of the school.

He snatched the wretched sheet of paper from Avery's hand when he saw a flabbergasted Avery looking at it. When I got one off the wall and made it into a paper airplane, he said I shouldn't touch them because… well, just because I shouldn't.

Ranma abhorred the posters.

"Are you serious?" Avery, whose bump on the head (caused by a previous kata blunder with Ranma) had magically disappeared, asked gravely. "You're not really going to kill the school paper staff, are you?"

My fiancé grunted.

"Look, Ranma, as much as I am appalled by these," I tried to explain, glancing at the walls full of the posters, "It's really not necessary to beat those poor people up. They're the media and that's what they do!"

"Poking and prying and taking pictures of us is fine," Ranma said through gritted teeth, "but it's a different thing when they actually place around school a couple of hundred posters of you and me _makin' out and lockin' lips_ in the dance and then putting a damn caption that says _'Ranma Saotome and Akane Tendo: All about love, but unable to contain their passionate surges of desire!'_ I swear I'll kill them!"

Looking on both sides of the corridor, Avery patted his back. "Cool down, Ranma. We don't want those people ending up like Kuno. He'll miss classes for about a week, poor thing broke a lot of bones…"

I took Ranma's fist in my hand and tried to ease the tension. "It's just the cold," I said calmly. "You feel cold, don't you Ranma? And it's clouding your judgment. You're not a weapon of mass destruction, okay? You're a high school student about to go inside the classroom because homeroom will start in five minutes."

"I ain't going into that room with _those media people _in it!"

"Now you're being childish. If it makes you happy, I'll talk to them." My hand rested on the door, ready to slide it open, when Ranma furiously shook his head.

Avery sighed. "Okay. I think a… _press conference_ would do us good. I'll schedule for the school paper to meet us at lunch, and then we talk and settle things out." He passed between Ranma and me and entered the classroom.

Ranma looked at me meaningfully. "It's not like the school knowing about us ain't fine, but…" he began, standing up from leaning on the poster-covered wall just beside the classroom door. "_They're violating our privacy, _Akane. Those posters just… Aagh, it's like… _sharing _you with the other guys, and I don't like it. Those perverts can't get you off their perverted brains, you know that! I swore I'd protect you, and they just threw in a hitch, damn media…"

And I have to say, even with the terrible feeling I had because of me and Ranma's making out photos around school, that I was greatly moved. And so I smiled, causing Ranma to tilt his head in askance. "Nothing," I answered breezily. "I was just… touched."

His face softened (background music: delighted girly screams from inside the classroom).

"I don't mind being the talk of the school," I continued. "I'm used to that all that time. But what you said just registered into my brain, and… well, thank you."

He flashed me one of his awkward grins. "Welcome, I guess." He tore a poster from the wall behind him and for the first time looked at it closely. "You and me don't look bad."

I giggled. "Of course not."

"And I look good with my eyes closed. I've never seen myself with my eyes closed. I'm more than good-looking! Wow, and you look pretty too. Your long eyelashes just curl up like that." He looked up from the paper and gazed at me (and so I blushed, just like I always do when he looks at me fixedly). "They're even longer in personal." He looked again at the poster and smiled with his eyebrows raised. "Man, we look really good when we're kissing. And is that your… _is that your TONGUE?_"

My jaw dropped as I hastily grabbed the sheet from his hand and looked at it. "No, _baka_, it's not!" I roughly shoved it back to him as he was starting to laugh mischievously.

The door beside me opened slightly and Avery popped his head out, looking paler than the usual. "Press conference at lunchtime," he said hurriedly. "Ranma, I suggest you keep your temper down 'til then. Just bear sitting beside the editor-in-chief the whole morning. Don't strangle him in the middle of Math class. And – aaagh – can you two go inside now? The girls are mobbing me again…"

I slid the door fully open and screamed. "STOP CLAWING ON HIM LIKE THAT! YOU'LL RUIN HIS CLOTHES!" I glared daggers at the girls whose greedy hands were all over Avery, and they retreated to their seats with disgruntled looks. "_Kami-sama_, look at you. You're a mess." I ran my hand through his unruly brown hair in a futile effort to arrange it.

"That's what happens when both of you leave me. I become vulnerable prey. _So don't ever leave me alone by myself, okay_? My ears hurt from all the screaming. And my body from all the constriction."

Ranma and I laughed. "Sure."

So there. Finally, both of us entered the room. And now I am really nervous, because Ranma's been shooting murderous looks at his seatmate who's been twitching since Ranma sat down. And Avery just passed me note saying that his backmate's violent trembling is disturbing him a lot.

Ooooo

**Tuesday, Lunch**

I'm so worried. They've been inside the school paper room with the school paper editorial board and staff for half an hour already. I'm getting cold. I wish I'd brought the fur coat rather than a denim jacket. And I'm really hungry; the three of us haven't eaten lunch yet.

Ugh, what's taking them so long? I should have gone inside that stupid room with them! I wish Ranma didn't ask me to wait here. I wonder–

Ooooo

**More Tuesday, Study Period**

There is now a long, crooked line on the previous page because I was violently pushed aside by the school paper members (all 21 of them) rushing out of the room. They had a really terrified look on their horrifically pale faces, and I'm sure it wasn't just the cold.

After a few moments, Avery emerged out of the empty room, straightening his beige _Hilfiger _jacket, his emerald orbs shining with amusement, followed by Ranma who was brushing off invisible dust from his shoulder, which I'm sure was just for a just-casually-survived-battle effect.

"Hey there, pretty thang, would you like to eat lunch with us?" he asked suavely, his blue eyes gleaming with sweet seduction and delight.

I raised an eyebrow. "_Pretty thang?_ Ranma Saotome, when did you start saying _pretty thang_? That's not even in your vocabulary."

Avery chuckled. "I taught him that. Did it work?"

I smiled sarcastically. "No. But I _am _very hungry, so I very well may be saying yes to Mr. Suave's invitation. And what exactly happened inside, anyway? Why did they run out of the room like they've seen Cologne naked?"

Ranma laughed, while Avery gave me a questioning look. "Who's Cologne?"

"A walking corpse," my fiancé snorted as the three of us started walking towards the cafeteria. "Mummified a century ago and rose from the dead just recently. Family friend."

It was my turn to laugh. "Okay, as tempting as our talk about wrinkled mummies could be, I really want to know what happened. If you did something physically atrocious to them, then–"

I was cut off because three guys from the school paper stormed past us, hurriedly peeling off the posters from the wall. They prevented having eye contact with the two boys with me.

"What's going on?" I asked suspiciously as we started walking again.

"You really wanna know?" Ranma asked, winking and then putting an arm round my shoulders.

I looked at him, then at Avery, who winked as well.

Okay. Getting weird. Ranma and Avery are becoming the Weasley twins, masters of mischief and secrets shared only between them. Is this Fate's way of telling me that she has power over all things on this planet, and if she willed it she can reduce me to a flummoxed heap of cells?

"What, you threatened to strip yourselves right then and there if they didn't remove all the posters?"

"OUUUCH," they chorused, taking a painful verbal blow to their manhood, male pride, physical abilities and looks.

"If we did, then they should have stayed to gawk at the two most handsome naked men they'll ever see their whole lives," Ranma said, casually colliding fists with Avery in approval as if they've been doing it for years.

I released a lungful of air and rolled my eyes. "_Kami, what in the world…"_

"We didn't beat them up, don't worry," Avery explained as we entered the cafeteria. "But since you don't really want to know, then we won't tell you anymore. What's on the menu?"

"Stir-fry," Ranma replied, taking his arm off my shoulders and taking a step towards the food being served by the cafeteria lady. "Pork adobo, lechon, dinuguan – man, that looks horrible – and fried… c-carp. There's onion soup as well, warm and anti-cold, but it sorta looks… alien."

And so the three of us got our stir-fry veggies with noodles from the obese but jolly cafeteria lady, looked for a vacant table and sat down, being eyed by all the students around us. Having gotten used to the attention, we ate our food and talked casually, like being eyed by everybody while eating was a completely normal thing. Amused, we occasionally looked at the students neurotically peeling off the posters on one side of the cafeteria.

Until Avery dropped his chopsticks and they fell noisily on the floor, since they're not made out of wood. His right hand just stayed numb in the air as he stared at it, frightened. He silently told us that he couldn't move, and I quickly took his hand in mine and rested it on the table before letting go, as to not leak out information about his condition to the many students watching.

"Is that the…" Ranma started, trailing off.

Avery nodded. "It's not the six-letter C-word, though. The other C-word, the longer one."

"The twelve-letter C-word?" I asked, referring to chemotherapy.

He smiled and nodded. I smiled, too. But Ranma didn't, because he was confused.

If somebody was going numb, nobody would smile about it, right? Wrong. Because if the cause of Avery's sudden numbness was the 12-letter C-word, then that would mean that the chemotherapy was doing its job of killing the evil cancer cells in his body. And that was a good sign – a very good one. If he had said that the numbness was caused by the 6-letter C-word, then the cancer has spread throughout his body.

But he didn't say _6-letter C-word_. He said _the longer one_. And that is why I was all smiles for the rest of the afternoon.

ooooo

**Thursday, December 16, my room**

Avery visited our home for the second time. Actually, he drove Ranma and me home, and since we had lots of homework to do because of the looming exams, we decided to do it here. At the Tendo residence.

4:30 – Niles the butler graciously refused to enter and said he'll just wait inside the limousine, so we let him be. Daddy and Uncle Genma cheerfully ushered our guest inside the house, where Kasumi was serving tea. The whole family already met Avery in the memorial park and found him very nice, so it was certainly a pretty picture. Everybody was asking him all sorts of questions while he politely answered with interesting answers. I saw Nabiki looking at him in a different way, though, and that made me nudge her toes with mine under the table.

6:00 – Dinnertime. Niles joined in because he said that his stomach was complaining. More conversation. Avery proved to be an excellent conversationalist, and he, Ranma, and I cracked everybody up when we told them about our misadventures at school during the week.

6:40 – Studying and homework. In my room. Ranma and Avery situated themselves comfortably on my bed as I sat on the chair next to my study table. We had a hard time concentrating, actually, because we kept on laughing about things. And then Ranma and Avery started wrestling like seven-year olds on my bed, causing a lot of destructive noise that didn't help. I decided that Ranma was a very bad influence to the once behaved Avery as I recalled that Avery wasn't at all hyperactive when I came to study at his mansion. Finally, Nabiki poked her head in and threatened to do something really… er, bad, and that shut the three of us up. Oh, and we are also going to accompany her in visiting Kuno-sempai in Dr. Tofu's clinic. Ranma didn't guarantee that he would apologize, though.

10:30 – Done doing all homework for tomorrow. We were almost done studying the coverage of the exams, and Ranma and I insisted that we could go on until morning to finally finish everything, but Avery gave a flat-out no and reminded us that we still have school tomorrow, and that we still have the rest of the week and the weekend to study anyway. Everybody else at home seemed to have gone to sleep already, so Avery left a thank-you note to my dad and left (he had a bit of trouble waking a freezing Niles up in the limousine).

Now it's about 11 already; I'm still writing on the study table, and Ranma is comfortably asleep on my bed. He looks so naive and gorgeous. He deserves a full page in… Vogue or Cosmo, or something.

"Sleep… tomboy…" he says hazily. I'm going to have to whack his head in the morning the moment he opens those pretty blue eyes of his.

It's really getting cold, even though the window's closed. Now where am I going to sleep? Stupid pervert. If he thinks I love him _that _much to share one bed–

Oh _Kami_, he just moved and left enough space for me, as if on cue. Pervert. If P-chan were here, he'd have scratched all the skin off Ranma and he'd emerge looking like a sunburned… pigtailed guy.

But my bed looks so warm and welcoming… and… _beautiful_, now that I think of it. Ranma makes my bed look beautiful. And _warmer_ and _more welcoming_.

I'm so sleepy. Goodnight.

Ooooo

**Wednesday, December 22, Avery's limo**

EXAMS ARE FINALLY FINISHED! I think I kind of botched World History a little… but I know I did very well on the others. Avery was predictably excellent in everything, and Ranma confessed that he somehow managed, thanks to Avery's voice in his head, lecturing about Khan and the Mongols and Mao Ze Dong and Fidel Castro and the quadratic formula and sentence structures.

Ukyou caught up with us just before dismissal time (and thank heavens she didn't challenge me to a cooking duel for Ranma's love, or maybe hit me on the head with that spatula of hers) and informed us that she'll be coming home to the province for the holidays to meet her family. And I think the gods were smiling upon us when, after taking a very deep breath, she apologized to me for her behavior in the past and said that from then on, she and Ranma will be very good friends.

With a last thankful embrace, Ranma told Ukyou to take care. Avery, Ranma and I bade her goodbye after that. And then the three of us celebrated in the ice cream parlor (you'd think that with all the snow going on, we wouldn't even think about eating anything cold, but apparently we all had an affinity to brain freezes and shivering) with Sayuri, Yuka, Hiroshi and Daisuke – we even let our ice cream melt before drinking it all up in a toast for "No more exams, Hiroshi and Sayuri, Daisuke and Yuka, Ranma and Akane, Avery and his fanclub, and happy holidays!"

Drinking frothy ice cream was a new experience. Quite nice, actually… but Hiroshi choked on his cherry, and after panicking to save his life, we all roared with laughter.

This is going to be the nicest Winter vacation ever. Cheers!

Ooooo

**Author's Notes:** Eeek (again). Forgive the length. Forgive me for… everything! Tsktsk. Fourth year high school schedules suck. I'll make it up to you guys. I WILL.


End file.
